


Pulling at Loose Threads

by hellowkatey



Series: Republic Spies and Jedi Guys [2]
Category: Star Wars, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: Clone Wars (2003) - All Media Types, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Anakin Is A Good Friend, Canon-Typical Violence, Enemies to Friends, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Enemies to Lovers, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Humor, Human Disaster Anakin Skywalker, Human Disaster Obi-Wan Kenobi, Hurt Obi-Wan Kenobi, Obi-Wan Kenobi is a Mess, Original Female Character(s) - Freeform, POV Obi-Wan Kenobi, Post-Order 66, Sexual Tension, Slow Burn, Undercover as Married, Undercover as a Couple
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-30
Updated: 2020-05-15
Packaged: 2021-02-28 20:34:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 14
Words: 45,056
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23273284
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hellowkatey/pseuds/hellowkatey
Summary: You and Obi-Wan have a history. One that usually ends in him trying his best to have you arrested, and you evading him successfully.When Obi-Wan gives you a chance to reform your ways, he also finds a side of him he was not ready to confront.*This is the Obi-Wan POV of Trusting the Process. It can stand-alone or as a supplement to Trusting the Process*
Relationships: Obi-Wan Kenobi & Anakin Skywalker, Obi-Wan Kenobi & Original Female Character(s), Obi-Wan Kenobi & Reader, Obi-Wan Kenobi/Original Female Character(s), Obi-Wan Kenobi/Reader
Series: Republic Spies and Jedi Guys [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1673530
Comments: 43
Kudos: 198





	1. You Didn't Have to Save Me This Time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the Obi-Wan POV of Trusting the Process. It can stand alone as Obi-Wan falling for the reader only from his point of view, but it will likely make the most sense when read after or alongside TtP!

Obi-Wan is not usually one to get involved in local law enforcement jurisdiction. He has no reason to; the Coruscant police force is more than capable of handling itself. 

Except when it comes to her, it seems. 

The first time he saw her, she was in a cantina, her arm linked with a very rich young man. He'd acquired his wealth fairly recently--and by sudden means--and was flaunting it in every way. Obi-Wan was only there that night because after spending an entire weekend in meditation, he felt the desire to be around people for a bit. Anakin abandoned him to go who knows where, so he thought he would do something he never does and go have a drink.

Of course, he cannot simply enjoy a cocktail on a night off. 

Obi-Wan couldn't help but notice the amount of alcohol she had consumed in such a short period of time. Every time her drink was half full he rang for another, pushing it in front of her and urging her to "catch up". The sway of her body and the fluttering of her eyelashes was beginning to make him nervous and angry. As angry as a Jedi can get, that is. 

After observing her for over an hour, she placed a sloppy kiss on the cheek of the man and excused herself to use the fresher. Obi-Wan watched as she stumbled her way across the cantina, catching the eyes of numerous other suitors with sticky fingers. That was it. 

He slid from his seat at the bar, placing some credits down for the tender and discretely followed close behind. He waited in the corridor until she came out of the bathroom. 

"Excuse me, miss, but can I call you a ride home?" 

She leaned against the wall, looking to where the corridor turns 90º and then down to his belt where his lightsaber hung. To his surprise, her glossy eyes suddenly cleared and her slouchy posture straightened. 

"You're a Jedi?" she said, crossing her arms. 

"You're... you're not... drunk?" 

"Ah, how chivalrous of you. I appreciate your concern, but I am as drunk as you are right now." 

"I'm not drunk." 

She winked at him. "Exactly, Master Jedi. Now, if you excuse me." She brushed past him, returning to the belligerently drunk routine as she stepped back into view of the bar. 

A con artist. Obi-Wan shook his head. While the young man shoveling drinks to his date was most certainly a predator of sorts, the woman he chose to target was likely more of one. 

Not his business though. He did his duty to ensure the safety of the young woman. 

The next morning, while reading the news a story caught his eye. 

HUMILIATION: YOUNG TRADE MOGUL ROBBED OF THOUSANDS

He hoped he would never encounter her again. If he did it would be his duty to turn her in. 

Unfortunately, there seems to be a law in the universe, where when you see someone once, you inevitably see them exponentially more often. This was the case with her. 

Even more unfortunate were the compromising positions he found her in nearly every time. Stealing, forgery, other cons. It was like she was _trying_ to drive him nuts. After the third time of running into her, he decided to make his intentions known. She was tucked away in an alley, obviously exercising her pickpocketing skills. He didn't know how he knew she was there, but something in the Force led her to him.

As calm and collected as when he first met her in the cantina she stepped out from her hiding place, eyeing his saber before meeting his eyes. 

"Jedi, what do I owe the honor?" she said, nonchalantly leaning against the wall. As if she doesn't have a pocket full of stolen wallets and jewelry he can hear clanking around. 

"Off doing illegal things, per usual, I see." he gestures to the lump in her cloak.

"I don't have a clue what you could be referring to." she smiles, placing her hand in her pocket protectively. "Besides, unless I look like a battle droid to you, I don't believe my _activities_ are of Jedi concern anyways." 

"Jedi bring peace and order to the galaxy. Stealing is neither peaceful or ordered. I have no problem turning you over to the law." 

"We can't have these fun little talks if you do that, _General Kenobi_ ," she smirks. Obi-Wan is caught slightly off guard by her knowing his name, but he doesn't show it. It does make him want to know her name, though. To even the score.

"It's not quite fair that you know my name but I do not know yours." 

She pushes off the wall with her shoulder taking a step towards Obi-Wan. He doesn't move when she is close enough for him to feel her breath on his chin. 

"I can't make things easy on you, now can I?" she whispers, taking a large step back and then giving him a small wave. Before he can properly react, a grappling hook has jetted out from a device she had hidden behind her back and hooked onto the roof of a building above. In an instant, she has pulled up the wall, nearly flying, until she lands on her feet on the roof. 

He doesn't follow her. Instead, he sighs, his cheeks rosy and head buzzing. He returns to the street, occasionally seeing her leaping across adjacent rooftops. 

* * *

With the history they have, he can't help but feel a breath of annoyance when he catches her speaking to an honest stall worker at the market. 

"Do I _want_ to know you're up to today?" Obi-Wan asks, stepping closely behind her. Defying one another's personal space for the sake of intimidation seems to have become a normal aspect of their interactions in the last few installments. At least he learned her name eventually, much to her dismay. 

She doesn't turn around immediately.

"Even scum like me has to eat, you know, Kenobi," she says, pulling credits out of her pocket and dropping them slowly-- deliberately-- into the outstretched hands of the stall owner. He hands her a bag of groceries and she finally turns around, a smug look on her face. "Can't even buy daro root without you breathing down my neck." 

Obi-Wan steps back in defense, feeling his cheeks grow warm and cursing their reactiveness. 

"To be fair, nine times out of ten you _are_ doing something illegal." 

She rolls her eyes, walking towards Obi-Wan but instead of continuing their usual song and dance, she brushes past him. "Has it been nine times already?" 

He turns around to offer his apologies for his behavior-- something he does not really like to do but in this case she seems particularly agitated-- but when he turns around she has disappeared into the dense crowd. No sooner than he concludes he can't find her, Obi-Wan is frozen with the feeling that something is very wrong. 

A disturbance in the Force. He doesn't need to think hard about it before hearing a loud crash and the sound of screaming in the direction the insufferable con artist just went to. Obi-Wan cursed to himself and took off against the fleeing crowd. 

He hoped she was smart enough to follow them. 

Of course, when does he _ever_ get what he wants? 

She stands motionless with her back turned to him, presumably staring at the oncoming attack like it isn't real. As quickly as she's standing she disappears. Panic rises in Obi-Wan's chest as he pushes through the crowd to where he saw her go down. Criminal or not, she doesn't deserve to die in a warzone. 

Her body lays curled in a ball on the ground, dirt caking her clothing and a streak of blood across her arm. Her hands cradle her head protectively against the stampeding citizens. Obi-Wan rushes behind her, scooping her up she's on her feet. He leans in, placing his lips close to her ears so she can hear him over the explosions and the sound of her own ragged breathing. 

"Woah there," he stabilizes her by placing his hand on her waist. "You need to get out of here." She just groans, and he starts pulling her out of the now abandoned road and shoves her into an alleyway. Maybe a little rougher than he usually would have but he does not have time for this. She falls to the ground, her eyes wide in shock. Then she looks at him, her eyebrows narrowing as she realizes he just threw her. He feels a smile tugging at his lips but he holds it back as best he can. Taking his saber out, Obi-Wan gives her a last nod and runs towards the oncoming battle droids. 

The attack is massive in comparison to what the Separatists usually attempt in a centralized city such as Coruscant. Obi-Wan is utterly shocked that they would be so bold in the first place, but this war has proven to bring out the unexpected in everyone. As he reaches the first line of droids, he swings into action. His saber slices through the scrawny bots while deflecting their blaster fire. Being alone against an entire platoon of droids is absolutely not how he expected his day to turn out. 

_Reinforcements will be here soon,_ he reassures himself. _I just need to hold them off until then._

In the back of his mind, he regretfully has found himself keeping tabs on his feisty friend. He can sense her presence, still lurking nearby. Why the hell she hasn't fled is beyond him. Blast, he _needs_ her to flee or else part of his concentration will remain on ensuring her safety rather than this fight.

She's a civilian of course. She must be protected. He would do it for any other citizen. 

He's fighting off four droids when he suddenly feels her presence shift. It's stronger. He quickly finishes the droids and turns around just in time to see her standing right behind him. From her hand sails a blinking device, soaring over the droids and landing near where many are setting up a cannon. One of the droids aims at her and he curses, pulling her into his chest. 

"What the hell are you--"

An explosion erupts. Obi-Wan wraps his arms around her protectively. Whether he threw them to the ground or the magnitude of the blast, he isn't sure. They land hard on the street, foreheads clanking together, limbs intertwined. Obi-Wan is vaguely aware of a dull ringing in his ears.

 _Shit. Shitshitshit._ He pushes himself up into a plank position to relieve her of his weight. Her head is tilted back, resting on the street but her eyes are open.

"Are you okay?" he says, trying to catch the attention of her glossy eyes. "Can you hear me?" 

Still nothing but a blank stare. 

"Please, answer me." 

She finally looks at him, but she doesn't reply. With the turning of her head, he spots trickles of blood exiting her ears. _Blast, she probably can't hear me._

At least she's conscious. He finally slides off of her, resting on his knees at her side. The bomb took out most of the other droids, but he can sense there are more on the way. He must get her out of here before that happens. 

His eyes scan down her body, searching for any other injuries besides her ruptured eardrums. When his gaze reaches her abdomen, he sucks in a breath. Deep red stains her clothing and drips down onto the street. In the center of it all is a shard of metal embedded deep in her side. He looks back at her face, but she has now caught up, staring at the foreign object that now sticks out of her stomach. 

Her hand shakes as she reaches over, gently touching the edge of the injury. "Oh," she says softly. 

"You need to come with me." She's still staring at her wound, so he gently places his fingers on the edge of her jawline to physically shift her attention to him. "You need medical attention immediately." 

A nod. That's all the confirmation he needs. 

He scoops her up in his arms, careful to not jostle her too much and disrupt the shard. She's cognizant to understand she needs to walk, so he lets her do so with most of her weight centered on him. As he walks down the alley--the one he put her in originally-- the reality of the situation comes crashing down on him. He can't help but feel the anger bubble in his chest. For once, he lets himself relieve it. 

"Why would you do such a thing? What could have even possessed you to run into an active battle like that? You could have been hurt or killed... or taken." She doesn't answer but his questions are basically rhetorical at this point anyways. "Why, you could have been three streets over, what the hell were you thinking?" 

She lets out a breath, her eyes finally meeting his. Obi-Wan realizes her hearing is returning. "You would have-- oh!" she groans, trying to curl into herself in pain, but he holds her straight to keep from pushing the metal in further. He searches her face, waiting for the wave of pain to pass. A pang of guilt hits his chest for getting angry with her when she's critically injured. "would have blown up if I weren't there." 

She's right. He absolutely hates that she's right. Still, the pride in him shows its ugly face before he can suppress it. 

"You wouldn't be injured." 

"Better off than you dead!" 

"I would have thought that would be what you'd want," he says before he can stop himself. Immediate regret fills every corner of his being as he can feel the way she recoils at his statement. He didn't mean it. He doesn't know why he even said it. 

The next block over is also empty. Obi-Wan guides her into a storefront. As soon as she has another surface to latch on to she separates from him, sliding to the floor. She won't look at him. He doesn't blame her. He can hardly look at her. 

"We have our scuffles, but I don't want to see you blown to pieces. I don't want to see the separatists take over just as much as you," she admits softly. He meets her eyes. He's never seen her look so vulnerable and it kills him that he'd treated her so poorly in the last few moments. 

"That doesn't mean running blindly into battle-- unarmed I might add!-- and nearly getting yourself killed." he says as gently as he can. 

"Why does it bother you so much? I am perfectly capable of--"

"I signed up for this," Obi-Wan blurts out as the culmination of his worry for her overflows. He steps towards her, "The battles, the ambushes, the danger. If I die in battle, then that is on me. But if you... if any civilian dies in pursuit of saving me like you almost did today... that is another innocent life on my docket that I can't handle to bear." 

She exhales deeply, letting her shoulders relax. A white flag to this moment. 

He begins to pace again when he hears her moving again. He turns to find her using the counter to muscle herself to her feet. Her face is pale-- too pale for his liking-- and her knees are wobbly. 

'Obi-Wan, look," she says. Hearing her use his first name makes his chest hurt for some reason. "I'm okay. It hurts like hell but it won't kill me."

"I can get you some bacta for that if you come with me--"

"I do believe you have a battle to attend to." Obi-Wan blinks a few times. He doesn't want to leave her, but he also doesn't have a choice. Reinforcements should be arriving but they will still need help with the next wave. Plus, he has no doubt he can locate her again. "Like you said, you signed up for this. I can take care of myself." 

_I see, using my words against me. Fair enough._ He's relieved she's joking with him again. He takes his saber off his belt and heads towards the door. His hand is hovering over the handle when he stops, taking another look at her. 

She's covered in blood and dirt and grease. Her hair is sticking up in multiple directions, some of the ends singed and other parts just matted against her head. She's an absolute mess. 

Yet.

He can't help get this turning feeling in his stomach when she gives him a small smile. A genuine one-- not a smirk.

"If I see you anywhere near the battle, I will have you arrested you on the spot."

Her face remains deadpan. "What else is new?" 

Obi-Wan can't help but smile this time before he runs out the door. 

* * *

The battle is quickly over with the help of reinforcements. With the last battle droid slain by his saber Obi-Wan clips it at his side.

"It sure was lucky you were here for the first wave, ay Master?" Anakin says, clamping a hand on his shoulder. "I didn't even have to save your ass." 

Obi-Wan's mind immediately goes to her. The memory of turning to see her holding that bomb horrifies him. Not because of the bomb, but of the lack of any sort of fear or hesitation on her face. The selflessness he never expected from someone he thought so lowly of. 

"Master?" Anakin waves a hand in front of his face. "What is it?" 

"I've cast an incorrect judgment," Obi-Wan says in a soft tone. He looks at Anakin, the confusion etched across his young padawan's face. "Come with me, I need your assistance." 

Obi-Wan takes off running, Anakin close behind him. He bursts through the door of the shop, still sensing her here. She lays on the floor, her hand holding a garment against the wound in her side. 

"Master what are you-- oh no." he runs in to see Obi-Wan kneeling at her side, his fingers pressed to her neck. 

"She's still alive. Call for medical immediately. Fuck, I should have done that before I left. How could I be so stupid?" 

"Master, who is she?" 

"Medical, Anakin!" He raises his voice in a way Anakin rarely witnesses. There's pain behind his tone, and he complies immediately, dialing the com number. 

Obi-Wan looks down at her, her face pale and closed eyes. Her chest rises at a troublingly slow rate. The shrapnel must have embedded itself deeper as they fled the scene, causing more damage than initially expected. 

"I'm sorry," he says softly to her unconscious form laying in his lap. "I misjudged you. I will repay you for the deed you have done to save my life. I promise." 

Medical arrives, taking her immediately to the hospital. Obi-Wan and Anakin follow close behind by foot, surveying the damage of the battle in the meantime. 

"May I ask who she is now?" Anakin asks hesitantly after a long string of silence. 

"You may." 

"Well, who is she?" Obi-Wan doesn't answer. Anakin rolls his eyes. "You said you'd tell me who is she." 

"I do believe I just said you could ask." 

"Master." Anakin stops, placing a hand on Obi-Wan's chest. "I hate to say it--mostly because it means incriminating myself-- but you're acting like _me_." 

This hits Obi-Wan harder than he expected. He absolutely is. He looks away from his padawan and friend, partially ashamed of his behavior... but also proud of Anakin's wisdom. He will praise him for that later. 

"You didn't have to save me this time, Anakin. Because she did." 

"I don't understand." 

"The con-artist I've told you about. The criminal that seems to be fairly strong with the Force. She picked up a grenade and saved me despite me doing nothing but make her life difficult in all the times I've met her." 

"Oh. Well, that's... unexpected." 

"What did you expect me to say?" Obi-Wan raises an eyebrow. 

"Maybe that you were carrying on some secret romance." 

"That's preposterous. Where would your mind get that?" 

Anakin rubs the back of his neck, continuing on their walk. "Not sure, really. So what are you going to do when she wakes up?" 

He hadn't quite gotten that far yet. 

"I'll have to think about that." 

"You said she is Force-sensitive? You could convince the council to make _me_ a master and then train her." 

Obi-Wan rolls his eyes. "There are a hundred reasons why that wouldn't work, but I appreciate the effort." 

"Well, what about making her a Republic spy? We always need them and if she gets away from you so easily she might already be pretty good at it." 

Obi-Wan rubs his beard. "You may be on to something, my friend." 


	2. Why Help Me?

Laying in a hospital bed makes her look small and young. This doesn't help the guilt gnawing at Obi-Wan.

"How is she?" he asks the medical droid, which seems to be scanning over her vitals. 

"The patient lost a lot of blood but should wake up soon. Her injuries were cared for. She will fully recover." 

Obi-Wan thanks the droid as relief floods through him. He glances down at the thick bandages around her abdomen. It will certainly leave a nasty scar. A forever reminder of her running into battle.

He pushes the memory away. He really needs to meditate as soon as he can. There is much going on in his head that needs to be sorted out. He wants to speak with her when she wakes up though. More importantly, he wants to just be there so she isn't alone. It's the least he can do. 

Giving her an opportunity to leave her criminal ways behind her is his next step of penance. He feels stupid for his oversight. The Force was bringing him and her together in so many ways and he pushed her away until fate made itself known in an explosive way. Whatever her role, it is the will of the Force and Obi-Wan is finally ready to listen to it. 

A low moan draws his attention back to her. Her eyes flutter open and then close. After a few moments, the process repeats until she manages to keep her eyes open this time. She squints, blinking in confusion. 

"Oh good, you're back," he says, leaning in so she can see him. "I was beginning to think I would have to find myself a new street thief to torment." 

"What... what are you doing here?" she croaks. Her throat must be parched. He spots a glass of water on a side table and hands it to her. She takes a few moments to devour the glass, handing it back empty. 

"Well, after the battle I came to look for you and found you hadn't gone too far before deciding to take a nap. I don't think the store owner would have taken kindly to finding you bleeding out on her floor." 

"Considering I lifted a pair of boots from her two months ago, maybe she would have welcomed that," she says, a smug look on her face. Obi-Wan raises an eyebrow in surprise.

"You--" he decides against his scolding. "Nevermind, nevermind." 

"I'm kidding." 

"Ah of--"

"It was a jacket, not boots." 

Obi-Wan rubs his eyes with his hands. She gives him the same feeling he gets with Anakin-- that she will be the death of him.

"You're much more tolerable when you're unconscious, you know." 

She smirks. "So I've been told. Did you win the battle at least?"

"I probably wouldn't be here if we hadn't."

"That is... that is true." Her smile fades and she looks down at her body to examine herself. Her fingertips trace the bandages wrapped tightly around her. She looks surprisingly neutral to them though he can tell she's uncomfortable. Now that she's awake, the questions he has for her are buzzing through his head. Why is she a criminal? Would she want to work for the Republic if she had the choice? 

Yet, when he opens his mouth to talk, he loses his train of thought. 

"Can I ask you a question?" He says finally. She nods. "What were you thinking when you ran into the battle. To uh... save me from the bomb." 

She exhales slowly, pressing her lips together. He can practically see the gears in her head. "I... didn't think. It was like it all happened in slow motion. I saw it and it's like my body just knew what to do." 

He leans back in his chair, nodding as he takes in her answer. How he didn't see it earlier is beyond him. It made everything make sense-- how she consistently was able to sneak up on him or get away with such ease and speed. The calmness she displayed in the battle and how she seemed to get "lucky" quite often. She's Force-sensitive. 

The one thing that he can't attribute to the Force is the selflessness of her actions. That is something that is a part of a person from the beginning; an attribute often found in the best of the Jedi. 

"How long have you known you were force-sensitive?" he asks, though her even being aware of it is unlikely. 

She looks surprised and then confused. She doesn't deny it though. 

"I didn't know for sure." 

"Well... it seems you are. I can feel it now. I hadn't truly noticed it before, but it explains a lot.

She sits up straighter in bed, that smug smirk returning to her lips. "Are you saying I've evaded you so many times because of the force... a thing I don't know how to control or use in any way?" 

That was exactly what he was implying. 

"The force works in mysterious ways, sometimes." 

"That's bullshit, Kenobi. Just admit it, I've successfully outsmarted a Jedi on more than one occasion." 

"You're starting to sound like my padawan." 

"Oh really, we should meet up to discuss our respective Obi-Wan is full of shit theories." 

Stars, he nearly loses it. As hard as he tries to maintain his deadpan expression he can't help the smile that is creeping onto his face. She seems to be having the same problem. 

"I'm sure Anakin would love that, actually, I'll be sure to _never_ introduce you."

She laughs in a way he's never heard from her. It's not the usual ones that are followed by a sneer and an insult aimed his way. This one is genuine, carefree. It awakens something within him that makes his chest feel warm.

It doesn't last though. Her laugh drops off and her smile fades and as she looks around at the medical facility he realizes what is on her mind before she can say it. 

"So, it looks like I'm not able to go anywhere. Is this where you finally make the arrest, General Kenobi? Are you just buttering me up so I have one last laugh before a jail cell strips me of my sense of humor?" 

"I have to be honest. My duty is to maintain order. And you're not exactly the poster child of that. But you also saved my life." 

"I've been looking for jobs, you know. A real job."

Interesting. And hopeful. "What will you do?"

"Hard to say. Think the Jedi Temple will let me mop their floors? My... skillset doesn't exactly translate well to a resume format." 

"Well," Obi-Wan says, standing up. His heart is beating embarrassingly fast. How is _this_ the negotiation that he loses his cool with? "I actually think I may have a potential job for you. Let me talk to some people first, though."

She looks utterly shocked. Her eyes are wide and her jaw looks ready to drop. "Why? I mean... I'm grateful, but why help me?" 

He runs his fingers through his hair, biting a little on his lip nervously. "To be honest, I don't really know." 

With that, he gives her a final nod and leaves the medical bay before he makes a fool of himself. 

In the hallway, Ahsoka sits cross-legged on the ground while Anakin sits across from her with his arms resting on his knees, fiddling with a loose screw on his lightsaber hilt. They both look at Obi-Wan as he comes out. 

"What are you two doing here?" 

The knight and his padawan jump up, looking at one another before Ahsoka steps forward. "The council was looking for you, Master Kenobi."

"Of course, I'll head there now." 

"Uh, Obi-Wan?" Anakin says as he passes him. He stops, looking back at the young man. 

"What?" 

"You might want to go to your quarters first."

Obi-Wan looks down at his robes-- still covered in dirt and blood that isn't his. No wonder she kept looking at his clothes every few moments. 

"Oh really, I thought battle grunge was in style this season," Obi-Wan says sarcastically before turning around to head in the direction of his quarters, Anakin and Ahsoka trailing behind him arguing the probability "battle grunge" _actually_ becoming a thing.

* * *

Obi-Wan finds himself a little nervous heading towards the council room. He's not sure why, and he tries his best to clear his mind and emotions, but he's sure Master Yoda will point out the strange bout of anxieties that have been surrounding this day. As he steps into the council chambers he's relieved to find only Masters Windu and Yoda.

"Kenobi," Mace Windu greets him.

"Good work at the market, you did." Master Yoda says. "Lucky it was, you were there." 

"It certainly was not an expected occurrence, but I was glad to be there to get ahead of the battle droids. Do we know the underlying purpose of the battle?"

"The purpose is still yet to be revealed, which is troublesome. We suspect it was a distraction from something, we just don't know what." Windu says. Obi-Wan suspected the same. 

"Do we have anyone looking into that?" 

"Master Plo Koon and Padawan Tano are looking into some leads right now." 

"Something else troubling you, there is?" Yoda asks, though his tone is more of a statement than a question. Of course, the wise master can sense Obi-Wan's stress. 

He strokes his beard, a bad habit he's picked up ever since growing the damned thing. "Just a strange occurrence. A woman saved my life in the battle. A criminal I have encountered many times in the last few months."

"A criminal?" Windu raises an eyebrow

"A con artist. Thief. She has proven herself to be good, though. Surprisingly selfless for the career she's chosen for herself. I'm wondering if the Republic Intelligence could use someone like her." 

"You want to make a con artist a spy?" 

"She ran out into an active battlefield to throw a bomb away from me-- we were not on the best of terms at the moment, I might add. It can take years to train some padawans to show that kind of dedication. Plus... she's sensitive to the Force. Strong for as untrained as she is, too. She could be extremely useful." He can tell Master Windu is apprehensive, but Yoda just looks at him with intrigue. 

"Injured in the battle, was she?" 

"Shrapnel to the abdomen." 

"Guilty you feel, for her injury, do you?" 

Obi-Wan sighs, running a hand through his hair. "I don't deny I feel partially responsible for her current state. I just... I have a feeling about her. We've crossed paths far too many times for it to be a coincidence." 

"The will of the Force you believe it is then."

"Possibly. I just know that there is a lot of good to her and if I can offer a way out of the current path she's going down... I think I should at least try." 

Master Windu and Master Yoda look at one another. Mace nods at him before they look back at Obi-Wan. 

"I will talk to the head of Republic Intelligence, but she will have to prove herself. That may mean working under you or another General until she is deemed trustworthy." 

Obi-Wan is surprised at the quick turnaround of Master Windu's decision, though he suspects they already had an inkling of what he was coming here to ask them. Anakin most definitely gave his debrief report earlier in the day, so it likely came up then. 

"I would not mind supervising her. It is my idea after all." 

"Settled it is. Your judgment of her, we trust."


	3. I Don't Offer Any Common Imbecile a Job

As her wound heals, her first day on the job comes closer and Obi-Wan's nerves rise accordingly. She accepted the position without hesitation. Even knowing him to be her handler for the beginning. It was a relief to see her trust in him. 

In the meantime, her strength grew to where she doesn't have to stay in the medical bay. Obi-Wan offered to accompany her home.

"It's funny you'll be seeing where I live," she chuckled while in the speeder to her home. 

"Why is that?" 

"I distinctly remember telling myself that I needed to prevent you from finding my home. I used to take roundabout ways just in case you were following me."

Obi-Wan holds his tongue in revealing that he had attempted to pursue her a few times, but she always seemed to manage to get away from him. He can at least save his pride. 

"Well, times have certainly changed." 

She instructs him to descend down into the lower levels of Coruscant. Nearly twenty levels down he pulls into an alleyway between a few tenements. 

"Home sweet home," she sighs. He looks around at the dark and musty apartments built into the depths of the city. No light reaches here. Only the glow of the streetlamp illuminates the path just enough that the general shape of her exiting the speeder is seen. "Are you coming?" 

Obi-Wan snaps out of his analysis of the sketchy area and hops out of the speeder holding her bag of belongings. She leads him into the entrance of one of the apartment buildings. They slowly climb the stairs to the third level where she unlocks the door at the top of the stairs and enters the apartment. 

Compared to the musty building, her home itself is quite clean and orderly. It's predictably small-- just a kitchen, a table, and a couch and armchair in the main room and what looks to be a bedroom and fresher adjacent to the couch. Even so, her shoulders relax as she enters, immediately plopping herself down on the couch. Obi-Wan sets her bag on the table, walking around the apartment to observe the collections of papers pinned to the walls. 

Some are figures-- hand-drawn by the looks of them up on the wall. He recognizes some of them as people high up in the Coruscant social scene. Targets for cons, probably. Some are layouts of buildings, diagrams of random mechanical devices. Obi-Wan comes to what he recognizes to be himself. It's a black and white drawing, of his head and shoulders. It's carefully shaded and sketched to depict him with a scowl on his face and a deep frown. To be honest, it's quite good despite the sour look on his face. 

"I see why you didn't want me to find this place. You like to leave a paper trail, I see." 

She just shrugs, seemingly unbothered by his examination of her wall of evidence. "Laying low gets boring sometimes." 

"I hope you don't continue this habit with Republic secrets." 

She rolls her eyes. "I'm not an imbecile, despite what you may think."

"Despite what _you_ may think, I don't offer any common imbecile a job as a spy." He says, turning around to face her.

"Fair point. Care for a drink?" she asks, rising from the couch and padding to the kitchen. From the cabinet she pulls out a bottle of alcohol and one glass, her hand hovering over a second one. 

"Tempting, but I must return to the Temple." 

She closes the cabinet, pouring herself a glass of the amber-colored liquid. "Suit yourself. Meditating again tonight?" 

"I plan on it."

She returns to the couch, sitting down with her legs folded underneath her. "What does meditation accomplish?" Her question has genuine curiosity behind it. She watches him closely as he approaches, sitting down on the armchair. 

"Meditation is a vital practice for centering oneself. It's a place to calm down, focus on the anxieties that may be getting in the way of feeling the Force and dealing with them head-on. A vessel clear of emotions allows for the Force to better inhabit it." 

Her head cocks at his answer as she considers it, her finger tracing the edge of her glass. "Then the Force is easier to use when calm." 

"That is the way of the light side of the Force-- the practices the Jedi teach from, yes. You are more in tune with the Force with a clear mind. You don't... sound surprised by this." 

"It was always random. I was comfortable in bed and wanted a drink of water, but I didn't really want to get up. I thought about how nice it would be if the glass just came to me, and as I was thinking pretty hard about wanting that glass to float across the room and I looked up to see the damned thing hovering on the table. It scared the shit out of me and the glass fell to the ground and shattered. There have been a few... confrontations I've found myself in where my hand-to-hand greatly improved when I calmed down and left things up to instincts. It never made sense to me but it worked." 

Obi-Wan strokes his beard at her stories. "You're using it without really realizing it. No doubt you're fairly strong in the Force since you're able to access it to a degree with no training." 

"Not strong enough to be a Jedi, it seems." 

"Your strength is not necessarily the issue. Jedi start training as younglings. I myself came to the Temple at the age of three, though most are identified closer to birth." 

She crosses her arms. "Are you telling me I'm too old, Kenobi?" 

"In the eyes of the Jedi Order, yes." 

"So I can't learn to use the Force, then?" 

"That's... a complicated question." 

She sips her drink. "I have time for a complicated answer." 

Obi-Wan sighs. "The short answer is you _can_ learn to use the Force. There are many non-Jedi throughout the galaxy that use it. However, a Jedi may not teach you since you are not part of the order, so you would either have to try and teach yourself or find a teacher." 

"So you can't slip me a few tips now and then?" 

Obi-Wan smiles. He appreciates her curiosity and willingness to learn and he can't say he hasn't considered teaching her a few things.

"Technically no." 

" _Technically?_ " she smirks. "Got it."

"I have no clue what you mean," He says, standing from the chair. "I also must be going now before my speeder is stolen." 

"Ah yes, the great Jedi Master must return to his surface-level residence to meditate in the sunlight." 

"I sense bitterness in your tone." 

"Good. Sounds like your senses are working correctly then." 

He chuckles, giving her a friendly smile before walking to the door. Before he leaves he stops, looking over his shoulder.

"I guess now would be a good time to tell you as an asset of the Republic you will be offered subsidized housing near your headquarters." 

Her jaw nearly drops. "Kenobi. You're just now telling me about this? I could have moved out of this shithole weeks ago." 


	4. How Cute.

In Obi-Wan's opinion, she needed more time before jumping into her new role. Unfortunately, wars wait for no one, and he was desperately in need of some intelligence for their next mission. 

They were nearing the last day of travel before arriving at the target location. Commander Cody walked onto the bridge holding his helmet under his arm. 

"I told Espy to report to the briefing after lunch, sir," he says, standing in his usual attention stance. Obi-Wan's eyebrows knit together in confusion. 

"Espy? Did one of the men change their names or something?" 

"Oh, no sir," Cody smiles, "I thought you heard. The boys gave the new spy a call sign. Seems to have caught on pretty quick." 

Obi-Wan shakes his head, his fingers stroking his beard. "Thank you, Cody, I'll see you at the briefing." 

Her presence here becomes more fascinating the longer she's around. Obi-Wan sent her off with Cody and the rest of the clones to learn the procedures and rules of the starship. By the end of the day, he found a group of the 212th had gathered around her as they pointed to different clones and she recited their names back to them. It became a game that she was exceedingly good at. When he was walking with her down a corridor one of them took off his helmet and looked at her. 

"I thought that--Hello, Boil," she greeted him, stopping mid-sentence. Boil nodded his approval and continued on. 

"I see you've built quite the reputation among the soldiers." 

"I bet them that I could learn all their names by the end of this mission." 

"And what if you don't?" 

She smiled, shaking her head. "Then I have to put on trooper armor and run an obstacle course of their design." 

Needless to say, her integration into the team was going smoother than Obi-Wan anticipated. Despite their rocky past, she is very likable. She, of course, didn't lose her wit, as she often fired back sarcastic remarks at him, much to the enjoyment of whatever of the soldiers were within earshot. 

The door to the bridge opens and in she walks. She's looked different as of lately, and he can't quite put his finger on it. She's been dressing about the same-- plain shirts and tunics with dark pants and boots. Her hair seems to be tied up more... maybe that is it.

"Has the time come for my first mission?" She smiles, joining him at the holo table. She places her palms face down on the edge, leaning forward to scan over the maps currently displayed. 

"You'll be thrilled to hear it has. I know we're all intrigued to see how you do, _Espy,_ " he smirks, earning a shy smile from her as she looks up at him through her eyelashes. 

"So you heard." 

"I did. Didn't take long for you to be inducted as an honorary clone trooper, I see." 

"It's short for _espionage_ , I'm told." 

"How cute." 

"I'm embracing it. Enough about that, though, what do you need me to do?" 

Right on time, Cody and a few others enter the bridge, taking their plate on the last third of the table. He notices them all greet Espy whether with a nod or a wave. 

Obi-Wan switches the hologram, revealing a turquoise and green planet-- Christophsis.

"We got a message from Senator Organa that the Separatist army has taken the planet. Admiral Trench has culminated a massive blockade around the planet and with transmissions being jammed we don't know what's going on down there. Your task will be to get onto the planet, figure out where things are happening, and report back your intel. General Skywalker will be joining us with the 501st to come up with a plan of action once we have more information." 

He looks at her to gauge her headspace. She looks between what is hovering above the table in the hologram and on a tablet containing more details of Senator Organa's message and everything else that is known. After a brief pause, she looks up from the tablet. 

"Are we sure I will be able to get through the blockade?" 

"They're still building it up, so you should be able to get in and out as a private vessel. You just have to get out before they close the blockade for good." 

Waxer steps forward. "Boil, Trapper, and I will be on-call if you need assistance as well." 

"Hopefully it won't come to that," Obi-Wan says, nodding at the infamous 212 Recon Division. "You are dismissed and can read through the rest of the files and come to me with any questions you may have remaining." 

She grabs the tablet and departs from the bridge, already reading through the file as she walks. He watches her leave, and the reason for her seeming different dawns on him.

She looks genuinely _happy_. 

* * *

So far, so good. She got through the blockade without issues. Now they wait for her report and for Anakin to arrive with the rest of the troops. 

The one part of the mission that makes Obi-Wan a little nervous is the lack of communication possible. Senator Organa managed to get a transmission out, but since then there has been nothing but radio silence. Sure, having an extraction team is great, but without being able to transmit a message for an extraction, what good is it? 

In theory, she should just be a woman in her private ship stopping to refuel. She should have no issues returning after her scouting. 

"General Kenobi," Rex says, approaching him with Cody following close behind. "We've been monitoring the blockade and they have greatly accelerated their formation. We predict they will have the entire planet protected in a matter of hours." 

"That's what I was afraid of." Obi-Wan sighs. "Admiral Trench is no fool. He knows we're coming." 

"We have no word from Espy either, sir." Cody cuts in.

"They must still be jamming transmissions."

"General, do you think she will get back before the blockade traps her in?"

Obi-Wan gazes out the front of the ship at the darkness of space outside the ship. He wishes her ship would pop out of hyperspace at that moment, but unfortunately it does not seem like he will be getting his wish yet. 

"I very much hope not." 

Rex and Cody leave him, and Obi-Wan finds himself gazing out the window of the bridge more and more. Apparently enough for Anakin to come up behind him, slinging his arm over his shoulder. 

"Whatcha looking at, Master?" 

Obi-Wan looked back down at the holo map he was supposed to be studying. "Just thinking."

"I sense unease in you." 

"I'll feel better once my spy returns back in one piece so we know what we're walking in to." 

"Oh," Anakin smiles, patting Obi-Wan's shoulder. "So you're worried about _her."_

"Oh Anakin, don't start with that whole thing again. It's her first mission and I want it to go smoothly." 

"Okay, okay, whatever you say." 

Obi-Wan glares at the young knight. "Don't you have battle plans to review?" 

Anakin is about to answer when Waxer and Boil come running into the bridge. 

"General Kenobi!" Waxer says breathlessly through his mask. "Espy made contact." 

Boil walks up to the holo map and presses a few buttons. The entire hologram erupts into a large scale map of Christophsis and the surrounding atmosphere. A soft gasp spreads through the room. 

It's a diagram of where all the ships, checkpoints, and major accumulations of droids are. The blockade is more advanced than any of them realized. It's like they have the entire Separatist navy camped out around the planet. The state of the planet itself looks to be just as complex. There are droids everywhere, nearly surrounding the refugee camp that Senator Organa so desperately needs supplies for. 

"Did she send a message as well or just a map?" Anakin asks, fiddling with some of the buttons. Suddenly another hologram pops up, this time of her. 

Her blue illuminated figure looks to be crouched in front of the camera, her hood up and her eyes constantly scanning her surroundings. 

"General Kenobi," she says, smiling grimly. 

"Espy, you look like you're still on-world.

She nods. "The status of Christophsis is much worse than we thought. Most of the population has fled by now due to the influx of Separatist forces in the city. They have cut off resources to the refugees remaining and--" she looks up at the sky. "by my estimation, they will be sealing off the planet here very soon. I uh, managed to... _come across_ the final battle positions of their blockade. That should also be shown on the map." 

Murmurs break out among the clones.

"Come across?" he raises an eyebrow. 

"The methods are unimportant at the moment. I'm just glad I was able to get a transmission sent ahead."

"Yes, how did you manage to unjam the signal?"

Blaster fire echos in the background and she looks over her shoulder, cursing under her breath. "A story for another time. I must go now if I am going to attempt to make it off this planet." She pulls her blaster from her belt. "Good luck."

The hologram cuts out before Obi-Wan can respond. 

"Damn," he says, the signal going completely dead. 

"Obi-Wan," Anakin says as he begins to examine the hologram closer. "I think these are a copy of Admiral Trench's direct orders." 

"You're kidding me," he says in disbelief, looking at the markings in the map. Sure enough, they are in the format of the transmissions that would have been sent out to every ship and droid involved in this attack. The value of having this... well it's way more than a scout report like she was assigned. This is a piece of top-secret information. As much as he wants to be annoyed at her going off the plan, she also has provided something that may give them the upper hand in defeating the infamous Admiral. 

"You should pick up recruits off the street more often," Anakin mutters under his breath. Obi-Wan gives him a _shut-the-hell-up_ look. 

"Okay everyone, it seems we have acquired the plans for Admiral Trench's blockade. With this, we can hopefully put together a plan of attack." 

Strategization proved to be a lengthy task. Even with the plans, the blockade was solid. They would have to go beyond the usual methods. Anakin mentioned something about taking a new model of stealth ship to deliver supplies. Obi-Wan decided to leave that operation up to him-- as much as he hates the unpredictability of Anakin's plans, he seems to pull them off somehow. Frankly, Obi-Wan prefers to have the benefit of being able to say "I didn't know he was going to do that," when the council questions him about his padawan's methods. 

When a session finally ended, Obi-Wan took the first opportunity to take a walk to the hangar. Cody was the first trooper he ran into.

"Any word from our spy friend?" he asked the commander, who looked at Obi-Wan grimly. 

"Not yet, sir. She missed her window.": 

"Dammit. Has anyone tried to get ahold of her?" 

"Not yet, but I can do that, General." 

"No, you have plenty of other tasks already, I got it." 

"Yes, General." Cody continues on, and Obi-Wan pulls out his com, setting it to as long-range as it can go. 

"Espy, are you there?" he says into the com. His question is punctuated by a long minute of dead air. If she were out of the blockade, she should be able to receive his transmission. If she's still on the planet though... maybe not. "Espy, come in." 

Nothing. 

Obi-Wan's stomach has a pit in it. He puts away his com, cursing slightly. He knows he needs to chill out. She obviously is more than capable of taking care of herself. The hologram of her with that glint in her eye and a blaster in her hand flashes through his head.

He just wanted it to be a simple mission. Just once. Of course, things would go awry. What is he to expect the way this war has been going so far? 

Still, he knows the next phase of this attack and it needs to begin whether or not she has made it of Christophsis. He reminds himself that she helped him come up with the plan of what to do in case they have to go into battle before she returns. She knows her mission. Obi-Wan needs to get his head out of his ass and concentrate on his own. 

"Ready, Obi-Wan?" Anakin's voice snaps him out of his racing mind. He turns to see the knight suited up in his armor ready for battle.

"Always." 

* * *

The fleet was assembled, awaiting the order to go into hyperspace. They would arrive in Christophsis's atmosphere and begin the confrontation of the blockade. The first ships took off, becoming nothing more than blips of bright light against the darkness of space. The next wave took off. Kenobi's ship was in the last wave.

He is about to give the order to go into hyperspace when he gets this strange feeling. He stops, closing his eyes and concentrating on the strange buzz in his head. 

"Sir?" Cody's voice seems far away. "General, are you okay?" 

Obi-wan raises a hand for him to hold on. Suddenly his eyes snap open and he looks to the far right of the bridge. In the distance is a small craft approaching rapidly. 

"Sir we have an unknown ship approaching. They are not answering our transmissions. Should we shoot her down?" 

"No! That's Espy," he says, quickly walking to the other side of the bridge to look closer at the approaching vessel. It's a junker, seemingly struggling its way through space as it is, but the Force signature coming from the ship is strong and clear in his mind. "Lower the shields and then go into hyperspace as soon as she's in." 

The crew compiles, and a few moments later Obi-Wan's ship thrusts into hyperspace. Relief blossoms through his chest as one of the crewmembers report it was her on the incoming ship and she's on her way up.

Sure enough, the doors to the bridge open. Obi-Wan turns to find her walking in slowly, her eyes meeting his at once. She looks like an absolute mess-- dark circles from lack of sleep under her eyes, the knee of her pants torn and a pretty bad scrape up her entire forearm are the most prominant features of her post-mission look, but she has a smile of confidence and relief on her grime-covered face. 

"You waited," she says, sounding a little surprised. 

"We almost shot you down, actually."

"I appreciate the restraint," she chuckles nervously. "My ship was destroyed so I had to borrow one. Turns out its transmitter was conveniently missing." 

"All that matters is you made it back." 

"We're going into battle now?" 

Obi-Wan nods as he watches a few soldiers from the 212th begin to make their way towards the hanger to get prepped. "Very soon. Your intel will likely prove to be vital for this mission. You did a great job." 

She grins. "I'm glad it was useful information." 

"I am quite curious to hear your _methods_ you spoke so little of--

"Oh boy..."

"-but that will have to wait," he puts a hand on her shoulder. He looks past her to see a small group of clones have accumulated nearby, looking over every few moments. He smiles and she follows his gaze, her expression lightening. "I think there are some people who want a turn to talk to you, anyways." 

"Probably going to try and trip me up on their names while I'm exhausted." 

"Get some rest. When you're recharged, you can join the rotation of manning the transmitters and relaying messages during the battle." 

He pats her shoulder and then dismisses her, walking towards the exit to go prepare himself for battle. 

"Good luck, General," she calls out after him, causing an involuntary giddy smile-- that she luckily couldn't see-- to appear on his lips. 


	5. I Have a Bad Feeling About This

At a certain point, Obi-Wan began to forget what it was like to _not_ be at war. It was a strange discovery to make-- a random realization over a harmless conversation at lunch about a mission he went on during his padawan days. It deeply unsettled him though. 

The Force has been feeling strange as it is. There was something brewing-- something dark and angry. He was constantly aware of it prickling at the back of his neck and it was beginning to annoy him. 

On top of the existential crises and the impending doom, he received an intelligence mission for Espy that was just the cherry on top of it all. It put him in a sour mood for the remainder of the day. Anakin was unfortunate enough to have to witness it.

"I have a bad feeling about this," 

"You say that about every mission--" 

"No, this time I really mean it." Obi-Wan interrupts his friend, crossing his arms and tugging softly at the hair of his beard. "This one is too risky." 

"Obi-Wan, you've got to have some faith in her. She's good at this." 

"I have faith in her," he shoots back, glaring at Anakin. "Don't put words in my mouth." 

Anakin exhales sharply in frustration. "I don't like this either. Putting anyone close to Jabba is dangerous. He isn't exactly the trusting type."

"Are you trying to talk me out of this or into it?" 

"I'm just saying-- you're not wrong about it being dangerous, but if anyone is going to pull it off, it's going to be her. That's why they assigned her to it." 

Obi-Wan hates that Anakin Skywalker is suddenly the voice of reason. He's right, too. She's gotten herself out of worse messes than being sent to Tatooine to infiltrate Jabba's inner circle. Hell, she's put herself in worse situations purposefully. 

He blames his irrationality on everything else that's going on. He's off his game, and his strange feelings of anxiety towards this mission must be transference. 

"I'm going to get her for the briefing, then," Anakin says, heading towards the door. 

Left alone, he waits for Master Windu to show up, centering himself with deep breaths. It's just the war. The lack of sleep. The loss. 

"You, my friend, need a vacation," Mace says as he enters the briefing room, giving Obi-Wan a pointed look. 

"Don't we all?" 

Obi-Wan can feel Mace sensing the tension in the room. His head cocks to the side. "You're unusually anxious." 

"I just..." he sighs, running his fingers through his hair. "I've been feeling this strange disturbance in the Force as of lately." 

"This has nothing to do with Espy going on this mission then?" 

"Wha-why would--"

The door opens, cutting off Obi-Wan and the strange direction that conversation was going in. Obi-Wan's cheeks feel hot and he stares down at the holo table instead of looking at her or anyone else in the room. He can feel her eyes on him nonetheless. 

Mace begins the briefing. "You've shown great promise in your time with us. This mission we have decided to assign you to could be the most dangerous one yet, but after a lot of strategizing with Generals Kenobi and Skywalker, I think we've reached a consensus," he pauses and Obi-Wan ignores the glare that Master Windu openly gives him. "and are ready to send you in. General Kenobi, would you like to conduct the briefing." 

"Very well." Obi-Wan pulls up a hologram map of the Outer and Mid Rim territories controlled by the Hutt clan. He's about to begin his explanation when she nearly recoils at the sight of the map.

"You're sending me to Hutt Space." She says matter-of-factly. Her face is neutral and hardened, but he can sense stress behind her stoicism. Anger, even. 

"Yes. There have been some intercepted messages suggesting the Separatists may be doing business with the Hutts." 

"Surprising. The Hutts aren't exactly known for their helpfulness. Much the opposite, I'd say." 

Obi-Wan glances at Anakin, who seems equally as confused by her behavior, especially with Master Windu in the room. She's usually very diligent about her words and actions around others, careful not to appear like she's undermining their authority with her sarcastic remarks that he and Anakin know to be just friendly banter.

"We are sending you to Tatooine, which is controlled by Jabba the Hutt. This is a less detail-oriented mission than usual as your only objective is to gather intel on what the Separatists are using the Hutts for. How you do that will require a bit more creativity and thinking on your feet. Does this sound... doable?" 

Obi-Wan looks at her and she finally meets his eye, nodding confidently.

It feels like she's staring straight through him, though. 

Anakin opts to go over the layout of the palace and the map with her, which he observes she isn't exactly paying attention to. Obi-Wan can tell Windu is noticing it as well, raising his eyebrow at him when they make eye contact. 

The briefing ends as it always does, with her being handed a case file to review in greater detail and her leaving. As soon as she's out the door Windu and Anakin turn to Obi-Wan with telling looks.

"Yes okay, I'm going." 

He runs out of the room after her, catching up to her quick gait. 

"What was that?" he asks, slowing her progress, but she keeps on walking without looking back at him.

"What was what?" 

"All of that. I've never seen you act that way." 

"So what? What do you really know about me anyway?"

"Okay," he grabs her forearm, and she finally comes to a stop. "Just hold on. If I didn't know better, you have a history with the Hutts. Which could be a major liability, so if there is something you need to tell me, I suggest you do it now." 

She tears her arm away, the look she gives him poisonously. "I'm not an idiot, I wouldn't have accepted the mission if I would be putting myself in danger. In fact, I'm probably perfectly suited for this." 

With that, she takes off down the corridor with fast, angry steps. He doesn't follow her but instead goes back to the briefing room. 

"What did she say?" Anakin asks as soon as Obi-Wan gets back, his arms crossed.

"What do we know about her past?" Obi-Wan asks, pulling up her file. 

"Not nearly enough, apparently," Windu shakes his head. "She was out of line." 

"There must be a reason for it. That was unlike her." 

He pulls up her file, but there is little recorded of her life. Her old apartment on Coruscant and a few employment stubs for the low-wage jobs she kept before becoming a con artist. The picture in her file is an old one. Her face is younger and her hair is much longer and unkempt, yet that hardened look remains the same. 

"Does she not have a birth record?" Anakin observes, scanning over the limited documents. 

"It doesn't seem so. There's not really anything from before she moved to Coruscant." 

Windu lets out a breath of frustration. "I think I agree with Kenobi on this now. Maybe she shouldn't do this mission." 

"No," Obi-Wan speaks up. "No, she should do it." The other two Jedi look at him in surprise. 

"You spent all day fighting this and now she proves herself to be emotionally invested in a way she refuses to explain and _now_ you want her to go?" 

"Master Windu, I think we need to have faith in her on this. She told me she is suited for the mission, and I'm going to back her." 

Anakin seems surprised, maybe even a little proud of Obi-Wan's answer while Mace just looks slightly aggravated. 

"Fine. Try to find out what she's hiding though." 

* * *

The journey to Tattoine is quiet. She was MIA for most of it. She claimed to be preparing but Obi-Wan has seen her work enough to know that she has had that file memorized since the first night he gave it to her. 

He found her prepping her ship, throwing nothing more than a small bag in the cargo hold. She's not in her usual clothes-- instead, she's been outfit in desert garb. Loose tan pants and a light blue long sleeve top. For protection from the sand, she has a dark brown jacket with a thick, leathery exterior, a scarf to pull over her head and mouth in a sand storm, and goggles pushed up on the top of her forehead. 

"Your comlink working?" he asks to break the tension. She looks up at him, simply nodding. "You have quite the ensemble going on there." 

"The sand storms here are not to be trifled with," she says softly. Her tone is surprisingly friendly, which gives Obi-Wan a glimmer of hope that they are moving past whatever strange energy has been circulating between them since the briefing. 

"So I've heard. You know the plan. I'll be listening, so if you need me just use your com." 

She gives him a polite smile. "Yes, of course." 

"Even if you're just bored." 

This earns him a slight chuckle. Progress. 

She takes off, and Obi-Wan makes way to the communications booth. He instructs Cody to watch over operations so he can concentrate on watching out for her. 

Within a few hours, he watches as her location moves from the landing pad to near the palace. Confused by her movements, he contacts her through the coms. 

"What is your plan?" 

Her response is immediate. "To _go in and say hello."_

"What? Are you mad?" He nearly yells, watching her location get closer and closer to the front door. 

_"You did say this mission was up to me. This is how I'm doing it."_

"That is--No I said-- You can't just walk in there unarmed and without backup." Obi-Wan stands, motioning for one of the other clones in the booth to approach.

 _"I don't need backup and I'm sure Jabba would prefer me to be unarmed anyways."_ she pauses. _"Kenobi, trust me, okay? I'll explain later."_

The com beeps and he knows that she has just turned off her speaker. She won't be able to hear him, but he will be able to hear her.

"General, how can I help?" The clone he motioned at asks. Obi-Wan sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose with his thumb and pointer finger. 

"Nevermind." 

He can hear her footsteps through the com as she shifts from sand to a stone walkway. Glancing at her position, she's just outside the palace. 

"I sure hope you know what you're doing." He says aloud despite her not being able to hear him. 

_"What is your business?"_ A new voice rings out. A guard, probably. 

"Mee am unko tah meet gee Jabba. Mee am an. Old pateesa u could settah." Obi-Wan's eyes widen, quickly punching in the function for translation. It seems she told them she was there to meet with Jabba as an old friend. She then tells them her real name. There's silence for a few minutes and then the sound of the door opening. 

"You may enter." 

She thanks them and the sound of her walking is picked up by the coms, this time more echoed from being inside. To his relief, the com beeps again as she turns the speaker back on.

"You know Huttese?" Obi-Wan says, an edge in his voice that he didn't mean to be there.

_"I do. I got past the guards, heading into Jabba's pit. Do you know Huttese?"_

"I can understand a fair amount."

The sound of music gets louder and Obi-Wan can tell she's getting close. 

The unsettling voice of Jabba is the next he hears. 

_"It has been a long time since you managed to escape me."_ the Hutt says in his language. Obi-Wan's mind reels. Escape him? She _was_ here on Tatooine. Maybe as a servant or... Obi-Wan's mind goes to Anakin's humble beginnings as a slave under Jabba's rule. Maybe she too grew up as such.

 _"Escape you? I believe we have two different versions of that story, Jabba."_

_"Please, take a seat."_

_"Thank you Jabba, I am exhausted from my journey."_

"You have a lot of explaining to do, I hope you know that," Obi-Wan says into the com, shaking his head. 

He listens to her talk with Jabba like she's speaking to a family friend. She explains her story that she is in need of a place to rest for a few days. Jabba surprisingly agrees and tells her to return in the morning. She leaves, and he tracks her back to the room she has rented in town. He waits for her to turn her com speaker back on, but she doesn't, so he takes matters in a different way.

She answers his holo call, the blue glowing figure of her sitting on the bed popping up on his communicator. 

"Why didn't you tell me?" he says as calmly as he can manage.

_"You wouldn't have let me do the mission if you knew."_

"You're damn right! There were so many other avenues you could have taken. But no, you marched right into the belly of the beast!"

_"It would have been more suspicious if Jabba caught me sneaking around--"_

"That's not the point. You should have told me you know Jabba. That he knows you." She seems surprised by his interruption and the rising discontent in his voice. It's not often she has heard him frustrated, so this must be about as surprising as him hearing her vent the other day in the briefing.

Her eyes narrow. "This _is not exactly a part of my life I like to dig up. I knew I could do the job and that is all that mattered."_

"You're missing the point. We could have taken more time to strategize or build a stronger narrative. What you did was reckless and could jeopardize the mission due to your nondisclosure."

_"My mission is to gather intel on the Hutts, right? Do you know what my job was when I was a servant to Jabba? I was a translator in meetings with bounty hunters, smugglers. Hell, I mediated a meeting between the entire Hutt council on one occasion."_

"How did you even manage that?" Obi-Wan's anger dissipates immediately. Curiosity takes its place as he imagines her taking the place of a protocol droid for Jabba the Hutt. The amount of trust in her he had to have had...

_"For whatever reason, Jabba trusts me. I served him... for a very long time to say the least."_

"And he just let you go? How did you end up in Coruscant?" 

Her expression darkens. The line of openness that seemed to be open is suddenly slammed shut again. " _With all due respect, General Kenobi, it is not relevant to this mission."_

Obi-Wan stiffens when she addresses him as General. She only does that when she's around others or she's asserting her displeasure with him. Seeing as there is no one around, he can only assume she is being very serious at the moment. She seems to immediately soften though, offering a small smile. _"Though, I promise to tell you the whole story once I return."_

So it's a touchy subject then. Noted. "While I am curious, do not feel like I am making you tell me. If it is not relevant then--"

_"Don't talk me out of it then. It's about time I process my past anyways."_

Obi-Wan shakes his head. _"_ Some Jedi meditation would probably do you some good."

_"You'll have to show me sometime. I'm going to get some sleep. Goodnight, Kenobi."_

"Goodnight," he says, and the hologram ends. Letting out an exacerbated breath he leans back in his chair, letting his head flop back so he stares at the ceiling. Somehow sitting her listening to her on this mission is more tiring than actually having to be on the mission. He's not quite sure how that's possible. 

Obi-Wan wakes up with the tentative hand of Commander Cody on his shoulder and the sudden realization that he didn't make it back to his quarters the night before. He rubs his sleepy eyes, Cody giving him a polite smile as he pulls himself out of this hazy state. 

"Thank you, Cody, I didn't expect to pass out here." 

"No problem, sir. Crys watched for transmissions from Espy. Doesn't look like she called in." 

Obi-Wan turns on her location tracker to see she's already in the Hutt palace. "Strange, she should have reported in before leaving this morning." 

"No other transmissions on the logs." 

He has that bad feeling again. 

"Do me a favor and playback her location for the hours I missed." Cody puts in a few codes and the little indicator of her location tracks from the room she rented for about three standard hours. Then, in the middle of the night, there's sudden movement. Her indicator jolts around a lot until it's steadily moved from her room towards the palace. The suns had not yet risen. "Oh no." 

"Sir, should I prepare an extraction team?" 

Obi-Wan looks at Cody, sensing the stress coming from the commander. He sometimes forgets many of the clones are also good friends with her. "Yes, but do not leave until I give the word."

"Yes sir," he says, leaving the room quickly. 

Obi-Wan quickly punches the transmission code into the holo communicator and tries to reach her. No reply. He speaks into the comlink, but there is nothing but silence at the other end. 

He tries once again. And again. Nothing. 

Dammit. 

He gets up, walking quickly from the booth to the hanger. Cody, Waxer, Boil, and Trapper are waiting by a shuttle, their faces grim and serious. When they see their General approach they perk up, standing at attention. 

"I cannot get ahold of Espy so we are--" A beeping at his com. His heart jumps in his chest. "Wait, this may be her." 

The hologram comes up.

"I have been trying to reach you for--" he pauses, the realization of her appearance hitting him. She's standing in a cramped fresher, blood running down her neck and a towel pressed to her face. He steps out of the way of the other troopers. "You're injured? Are you okay? What happened?" 

_"Jabba decided I needed to be roughed up to prove my loyalty,"_ she says, removing the cloth to reveal a deep gash along her chin. "Bounty hunters Dengar and Embo woke me out of a dead sleep." 

"Are you okay?" he asks, pushing down the frustration with himself for not being awake. He allowed this to happen. 

_"I'm fine. Really. I talked to Jabba and he seems to believe my story for now. But I can't stay here long. Jabba knew the Republic was sending a spy."_

"He knew? How could he know that?" 

_"Well, who knew about this mission?"_

Obi-Wan stops, taking in a deep breath. "Are you saying you think there is a mole?" 

_"It's a theory. I am going to try to find out more when--"_

"No, we need to get you out of there. If there is a mole, your cover could be blown." This mission was a bad idea. Not only did he fail to figure out her past association with Jabba like Master Windu asked, but he managed to let her get captured and beat while he took a damn nap. 

His judgment is clouded and she's the one being affected by it.

_"They obviously don't know who the spy is if they had to interrogate me. Just give me a few days, let me see what I can find."_

"I really don't think--"

 _"Please,"_ She interrupts him. _"At this point, extracting me would be far more dangerous. I need to leave naturally, preserve my neutral image to Jabba as best I can. That means staying for a few days, keeping my head down, and seeing what else I can figure out."_

He looks at her and sees clarity of mind and determination. With a sigh and a shake of the head he expresses his discontent.

_"I know, but you just need to trust me."_

"You're starting to sound like Anakin. Between the two of you and Ahsoka, the council must think strong-willed rebelliousness is part of my curriculum." 

_"Is it not?"_

Despite the war waging in his head, he smiles. 

"I'll give you the time, but get out as soon as it is safe. Do you promise?" 

_"Yes, I promise. I'll report back as much as I can."_

"Excellent," Obi-Wan goes to hang out the transmission, but he stops, a heaviness in his chest. He looks at her glowing holographic stare, head cocked slightly to the side as she watches him intently. "Be careful, okay? I don't want to have to bring you home in a bacta tank." 

Her hologram disappears before she can reply. He prefers it that way. The come-down of the rapid succession of events from him waking up in the booth to realizing she was missing and not replying to being told there's a potential _mole?_

The only people who knew about this mission directly were Anakin, Master Windu, Chancellor Palpatine, and Obi-Wan. Anyone else would have to go into the secure files. He'll have to check the access privileges.

At least they didn't know it was her. That may mean it was just an intercepted transmission instead of a security breach. 

His mind is reeling. 

He can feel the eyes of the troopers he practically ran away from watching him. 

He takes a deep breath and goes to explain the situation to them and ensure them of her safety. 

Though, something still nags at him. That disturbance that has him so distracted. It's familiar yet he can't place the source. 

* * *

"What are you saying?" Anakin's hologram illuminates Obi-Wan's dark quarters. The young knight went to assist with a battle nearby and is on his way back to the ship.

"The Hutts knew the Republic might send a spy." 

"Jabba is notoriously suspicious, he could have just been paranoid." 

"She was very clear that he 'was told' a spy would come." 

"Just what we need." Anakin huffs. "What do you need me to do, Master?" 

"Check if any of the transmissions got crossed. And if the files were accessed by anyone." 

Anakin nods, and the holo cuts off, leaving him in the dark. It's been a few days since the incident, and he can't find anything that would point to a mole. He hopes Anakin will be able to have better luck picking up a lead. Other than that, things have gone surprisingly smooth. She is keeping her head down, spending the time in the court, and not getting kidnapped in the dead of night. Progress. 

Obi-Wan, on the other hand, got tattled on. The first half of his conversation with Anakin consisted of him _encouraging_ him to go to sleep and stop making his men nervous by staying up for two rotations straight. He suspects Cody said something to Rex and Rex told Anakin, which of course meant Anakin was going to threaten to tell Master Yoda and Windu. Predictable, but effective nonetheless. Obi-Wan gave Crys the reigns and agreed to sleep tonight. 

He climbs into his bunk, lying flat on his back and staring up at the ceiling. Despite being awake for so long, he's hardly tired. 

He turns up the volume on his comlink. Just in case.

Closing his eyes, he rolls onto his side into a comfortable position. 

Better check to make sure it isn't accidentally on silent... 

Roll over.

Close eyes.

Is his lightsaber close?

He reaches over the side of the bed, his fingers grazing the hilt of his weapon. 

Okay, okay. 

Roll over.

Close eyes. 

This time it worked. 

"Why can't bad guys hang out on tropical ocean planets?" Anakin grumbles, kicking the sand in front of him. 

"You should ask them." Obi-Wan replies. He looks out at the endless expanse of dunes. Rolling hills of nothing but sand and the clear blue sky. 

"Two suns just seems excessive too." 

"That, you'll have to take up with the Maker." 

"Are you sure we're going the right way?" 

"Anakin," Obi-Wan sighs. "just because we're back on your childhood planet doesn't mean you get to act like a child." 

He kicks the sand again, this time it catching the wind and flying back into Obi-Wan's face. He winces as the fine grains dig into his skin and get into his eyes. "Dammit, Anakin!"

"Master, I didn't mean to, I'm so--" the padawan stops mid-sentence as Obi-Wan rubs his eyes and brushes the sand off his eyes. 

"I don't believe that sentence found an ending,"

"Obi-Wan," he says, alarm in his tone. Obi-Wan squints through his burning eyes, to see a wall of brown blacking out the clear blue sky. "Sandstorm." 

"Just our luck." Obi-Wan huffs, looking around for somewhere to take cover. There's nothing though. 

An alarm starts blaring. From where Obi-Wan can't tell, but it must mean there is an establishment somewhere close.

"Where is that alarm coming from?" he asks, earning a confused look from Anakin. 

"Alarm?" 

The sand grows closer, the wind hollowing. Obi-Wan covers his face with the sleeve of his cloak. "Yes, the alarm. We need to find shelter!" 

"Master, I don't--" His voice is drowned out by the sand storm hitting like they've run into a wall. It's practically opaque, and Obi-Wan lunges forward to grab Anakin's arm but he's too late. It's like it swallows him whole, pulling him into a dark nothingness of nothing but sand. He tries to yell out his name, but there's no way he could hear it. 

Sand is everywhere. In his eyes, his nose, his mouth. He can feel it dropping into his ears, down between his skin and his clothing. It's like he's drowning in it. 

"Anakin!" He yells again. 

"Obi-Wan." he hears his name coming from behind him. He quickly turns, only to find the whistling winds and another wall of sand. 

"Anakin where are you?" 

He sees a figure move. Just faintly. Obi-Wan steps towards it, squinting hard to see the shadow of a person through the storm. His stomach turns as he keeps going forward, the feeling of impending doom resting on his shoulders. 

The dark figure stops moving and Obi-Wan can see the outline better now. He keeps pushing forward against the storm. The alarm seems farther away now. They're going in the wrong direction, dammit. If only Anakin would stay close to him. 

"We must go back the other way." he yells, but through the storm and the whistling of the wind and the blaring alarm, there is just deep, sinister laughter. It cuts down to Obi-Wan's bones, and his hand immediately falls to his lightsaber. "Who's there?" 

There is no reply. Just the sound of a saber igniting, and two bands of red jetting out through the darkness in opposite directions. 

Obi-Wan stumbles back in surprise, but that glowing red only draws closer. "That's impossible," he yells, reaching for his own saber, only to find that it has disappeared. The alarm blares louder, ringing in his ear as the light is only inches from his face and in the glow he sees the face of the dead.

"Maul." Obi-Wan whispers, sitting straight up in his bed. His hair is stuck to his forehead, slick with a cold sweat. It was only a dream. Only a dream. 

But the blaring alarm wasn't. 

His comlink, now fallen on the ground next to his saber, blinks red and rings loudly. He curses, grabbing the objects and jumping out of bed. She's hit the panic button. 

Obi-Wan throws on his boots, radioing Commander Cody to prepare an extraction team. He runs straight to the hangar, trying every few minutes to get a reply from her, but her microphone is off. 

He reaches the prepared ship, jumping into the shuttle and ordering them to take off immediately. 

"What do we have sir?" Cody asks, looking at the navigation screen with her location. She is still in the palace it seems. 

"Panic call. Something's very wrong.' he replies, not only because of her calling but because he can just feel it. There's darkness looming over the planet of Tatooine. It's clear through the Force, hitting him a punch in the jaw now. 

They enter the atmosphere, flying towards the palace. As they grow closer he can feel the disturbance growing stronger and stronger. He gives the men a general plan to enter the palace and find her. Just as he's telling them where to land his comlink beeps and he raises it to his mouth quickly. 

"Where are you?"

 _"Back exit, on the_ walkway," she says, sounding breathless. _"Maul is right behind me. I have his saber. There's another one too, but I haven't seen him."_

Obi-Wan thinks his heart might stop. Everything--that feeling he's been having--suddenly makes sense.

"I'm sorry, you WHAT? Did I just hear you say, Maul?"

He doesn't even have time to question why the HELL she has his SABER, or HOW she managed to do that. 

_"Yeah, that was the part of the update I didn't get to give. Just get me out of here."_

He turns to the pilot. "Go round to the back. Tell the other shuttle to take the front. There is a very dangerous Zabrak in there. Tell them to be very careful of him." 

The ship dips, heading in the right direction now. 

"I'm in a transport. We're on our way to pick you up-- it'll be there any minute," he says to her. 

_"Fantastic, I--"_ and then her voice stops with a deep gasp and a choke and Obi-Wan feels his blood run cold. He opens the shuttle doors, looking out over the sandy landscape surrounding the palace. they round the corner and in the distance, he can see the walkway.

The dark side of the force is potent. He takes out his saber, ready to jump off at the first chance. 

They draw closer and Obi-Wan can see the red-skinned Zabrak-- the one he thought he had killed so many years ago-- standing on the walkway overlooking a canyon with his hand stretched out in front of him. Across the walkway, she hovers above the ground, her hands at her throat and her body stiff. Between them is a floating cylindrical object-- Maul's saber? As they get closer he can see him straining to get the saber back to him, but it floats there. 

The realization dawns on him. _She's_ doing that. 

They finally fly over the walkway and Obi-Wan yells Maul's name, getting him to take his focus off of her and onto him. As soon as the Sith looks away Obi-Wan watches in amazement as the saber goes flying over the edge of the chasm, the push of the Force propelling it downward. 

"Land and back me up," he says to the clone troopers.

Then he jumps off the transport.

As he drops, so does she, crumbling to the ground with desperate breaths and drooping eyes. He lands between her and Maul, immediately igniting his saber and getting into his battle stance. He hears the ship behind his land and the sound of footsteps crossing the walkway. 

He just looks at the Sith that he assumed to be dead. How could he have possibly survived? He eyes the prosthetic legs, the clawlike extensions at the end. The Zabrak looks thinner, with a wildness in his eyes that's much different from the collected look he had years ago. The anger still radiates off him though. 

"I believe it's your move," Obi-Wan says. Maul's face twists into a small smile. Almost like he's satisfied. Not the reaction he expected.

"Not yet. But soon," he replies calmly, his eyes flickering to the side. Before Obi-Wan can do anything, he jumps over the side, disappearing into the dark chasm below.

Some of the troops look over the side. From the palace, the remaining ones that were on the other transport come out looking quite frazzled. 

"Take that transport back. I will go with the other one," he tells Waxer who is waiting for him. He nods, and the full shuttle takes off. 

Obi-Wan walks into the palace, glancing at the blaster marks all over the walls. A few servants cower into their rooms as he passes, weaving through the hallways until he comes into the mostly empty court of Jabba the Hutt. 

A bounty hunter pulls out his weapon at the sight of the Jedi, but Obi-Wan raises his weaponless hands. 

From behind him he hears Jabba order him to back off. 

"What are you doing here, Jedi?" Jabba asks in Huttese. "Was that noise your doing?" 

Obi-Wan turns around, bowing. "Your Highness, I must apologize for the racket. I was tracking a criminal through the galaxy and found him here on Tatooine. I must, unfortunately, report that he has fled, killing one of your servants he used as a hostage in the process." 

"You have caused damage to my palace and my property? How will you pay for this?" 

Obi-Wan rubs his beard. "Well, your Highness, I was hoping driving away a dangerous Sith would call us even." 

Jabba laughs deeply. "I do not take the side of the Jedi or Sith."

"Even if his plot was to return to kill you?" 

Jabba looks more surprised at this. "What do you know, Kenobi?" 

Obi-Wan holds back his smile. "I see we have a deal then." 


	6. I've Heard Rumors

"I've heard rumors," Anakin says in a sing-song tone as he jogs up to walk alongside his master. Obi-Wan grimaces, thankful that his beard hides the heat rising in his cheeks. 

"Anakin, what have I told you about gossiping." 

Obi-Wan is walking back from discovering her fast asleep in a lounge area tucked away in the back of the starship. He went looking for her after she wasn't at breakfast, only to find her quarters unlocked and empty. It didn't take long for him to figure out her sleeplessness manifested in her exploration of the ship. It's something he's also done numerous times. Finding her in the old senator's lounge wasn't a surprise either. He too has fallen asleep watching the glimmers of passing stars. 

He decided it best to let her sleep. He draped his cloak over her for added warmth. He planned to return in a few hours. 

Then Anakin found him with a glean his eye that can only mean he's in the mood to cause trouble. 

"I like to think of it as comradery with the men." 

"Right."

"They mentioned quite a tender moment in the hanger with Espy." 

Damn it, he should have restrained himself. At least waited until he wasn't in a room full of troopers who Anakin obviously has the inside scoop with. 

The image of her coming off the transport, her body weight almost entirely leaning on Boil, flashes through his memory. She was horribly pale, a massive saber burn cutting into her shoulder and exposing charred skin. Her robes were covered in sand and blood, likely an unpleasant combination. As he took over Boil's escort, something in him just clicked. He felt this massive relief to see her standing there and embraced her carefully. 

They've grown to be good friends in the last year or so. He enjoys her company and to see her standing on that bridge with Maul-- someone he thought he would never see again-- it awakened this urge within him. He couldn't stand to see her die at his hand. Holding his master while he died at Maul's blade was enough. 

"I didn't realize a hug was so scandalous." 

Anakin smirks. Obi-Wan knows what he's thinking about too. Obi-Wan spotted Anakin and Senator Amidala sharing an embrace a few months back. He made a snarky quip about how close they've become since seeing her again after ten years, pretending not to see the blush that rose on his padawan's cheeks. 

Obi-Wan is no fool. He is aware of Anakin's feelings for the woman and despite the lack of evidence, he suspects they have a relationship. 

He hasn't quite decided how to address that whole situation though. 

Anakin seems to know how _he_ wants to address whatever he thinks is going on between Obi-Wan and her. 

"It's not scandalous, per se. Surprising maybe."

"Is this you trying to tell me you would like me to hug you more?" he raises an eyebrow at his young padawan. Anakin rolls his eyes at first, but then stops and sort of shrugs.

"Actually that might be quite nice." 

"Duly noted.

"I also heard another thing." 

"What is that?" 

Anakin stops, looking down the empty corridor. "She used to Force against Maul?" 

Obi-Wan hoped people wouldn't ask questions about that. "Maul was weak. Injured. She broke his wrist."

"That doesn't explain how she was able to fight against a Sith's Force powers and throw his saber down a canyon. She's untrained..." Anakin squints, his gaze searching Obi-Wan's face. "Right?" 

"You think I'm giving her tips?" 

"Are you?"

"No, Anakin." he sighs, messing with the rebellious hairs on his beard that like to stick out. "She's smart though. She understands the very basics of the Force. It wouldn't surprise me if she picked up a few tricks as the older Force-Sensitive children do sometimes."

" _Should_ we be training her?"

"I... I don't know. I don't think the council would allow it at her age. They didn't even like you being nine when you began." 

Anakin scoffs, likely remembering the difficult first few years of his training. 

"True. She has a Force signature, though. I can sense her sometimes. That could be bad if she doesn't know how to control it." 

Obi-Wan has sensed her before as well. Her first mission a year ago was the last time... before today when she was fighting against Maul. Maul's signature was certainly more overpowering, but he could definitely distinguish her from him. 

"I'll have to ask the council for guidance." 

"Probably for the best. Maul doesn't seem to like it when people get in his way." 

The words Maul uttered to Obi-Wan before jumping off the walkway still linger in his mind. It was a threat and a promise. He will definitely have to look out for the ravenous Zabrak. 

Stars, he can hardly believe Maul is alive. He cut the man _in half_. That should have been the end. Obi-Wan can't help but feel a tinge of insecurity. Killing Maul was his trial to become a Jedi Knight, and now the Sith is found alive. What could that mean? 

Anakin excuses himself to go meet up with Captain Rex, leaving Obi-Wan where he stopped. He was going to his quarters, but he now feels the desire to go back down the hall he just came. 

He glances back at Anakin disappearing around the corner and then turns around to go back towards the lounge. 

She's still asleep when he steps back into the room. Still curled in the same position. The lounge is a small room with a plush couch shaped like a half-circle that takes up nearly half of it. The true hallmark of the hideaway is the massive window that looks out into space. At hyperspeed, the stars blur together into ribbons of bright lights. It's truly beautiful. 

He sits down next to her feet and watches the lights go by. After a few minutes, she begins to stir. He looks over at her, seeing her eyes flutter open. 

"I see you found my favorite hiding place," Obi-Wan says softly as her gaze lands on him and she seems to realize where she is. 

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to sleep here. I was just--"

"Taking a walk? You wouldn't be the first. This room used to be for distinguished guests that may be traveling on the ship. It was locked until Anakin managed to "accidentally" break the locking mechanism, making it open for anyone. Not like we get many guests anyways."

"It's beautiful." 

"Indeed. It makes you forget you're at war. Even if only for a few moments." Obi-Wan looks out the window, his smile fading. He's not really sure why he's admitting these things, but it feels good to say aloud. 

He feels her eyes examining him. 

"How do you deal with it?" She asks suddenly. He looks at her again. She's clutching his cloak, running the material between her fingers nervously.

"Deal with what?" 

"War. The horrible things you see nearly every day. How do you sleep?

He laughs at her last question like it's a joke. "I don't sleep. Not very well, at least."

"So it doesn't get better, is what you're telling me."

He leans towards her, looking into her eyes. She has this incredible strength to her that he admires. She never shows her fear if she has it. She appears to be seemingly unaffected by anything the galaxy throws at her. 

Yet now, when he looks into her eyes he sees the exhaustion behind it. The flecks of fear. He knows that look well. 

"Who do you see? When you close your eyes." 

She looks away from him. "As of lately, Maul." 

He hasn't heard her debrief so he's still not entirely sure what he did to her. What he must have said to make her sleepless after such a tiring day. How he even found her. He hadn't considered the things he didn't know yet. Visible wounds aren't the only injuries that can occur. 

Obi-Wan reaches his hand out, placing it over hers softly. She looks surprised by his action. 

"He can't hurt you anymore. I won't let that happen. Running into him was... an unexpected coincidence. I'm sorry you even had to face him." He pauses, running his thumb gently along her skin. "Though, I'm sure he's sorry he had to run into you the way you dealt with him." 

She smiles, staring at his hand over hers. The moment hangs in the air thickly as the tension seems to build slightly. After a long moment, she finally looks at him, her expression softened to a degree he's never seen from her. 

"I was born on Dandoran." she begins. 

And so she tells her story of her smuggler parents and her ultimate position as a servant to Jabba after their disappearance. How she spent her adolescent years trying to maintain her innocence and ended up becoming a trusted advisor to the Hutt. It explained his reaction to her return. When she realized where her life was headed she left, finding her way to Coruscant. Found her way to Obi-Wan's life. 

She began to cry at some point. He had never seen her express her emotions so strongly. In a strange way, he was jealous of her ability to talk about her fears and attachments so freely. At the same time seeing her like this broke his heart. Her entire tough persona was disintegrating before him. All he could do was scoot forward, wrap her up in his arms, and hold her. 

She practically melted into his embrace. It was different than when he hugged her in the hanger. She balled the fabric of his robes up in her fist, let herself lay her head against his neck. He ran his hands up and down her back, soothing the silent sobs that escaped her shaking body. 

They finally part, her cheeks pink and still tear-stained, but she seems better than before. That strength has replenished and he can't stop staring into her eyes to marvel at how beautiful it is to see that again.

* * *

Obi-Wan sits on his bed in his ship quarters, reading through some notes from the day. There's a knock at his door and he stands to answer it. The door opens to reveal her standing in his doorway. 

"What are you doing here?" he asks, glancing down the hall.

"Obi-Wan," she says, her voice breaking like she's about to cry. He pulls her into the room, shutting the door. She practically falls into his chest and he wraps his arms around her in response. 

"What is it? What's wrong?" he asks her, moving backward slowly until the back of his knees hit the edge of his bed. He sits down and she follows, sitting across his lap and burying her face in his shoulder. She doesn't seem to be crying but he can't see her face with it pressed into his shirt. One of his arms wraps securely around her waist while the other settles on her knee. 

She still hasn't replied. He tries to crane his neck to look at her, but he can't seem to get an angle. He reaches up with the hand that rested on her knee and brushes the hair that has fallen into her face behind her ear. Before he realizes what he's doing he leans down and presses a soft kiss to the top of her head. 

This seems to get her attention as she leans back, removing her face from his shirt and looking at him with uncertain eyes. For a moment he thinks he's crossed a line, but his doubts are extinguished by her leaning in and kissing his cheek softly, her face remaining close as she looks him in the eye. He can feel his heart pounding, the proximity of them driving Obi-Wan nuts. Her eyes travel down to his lips, and he closes his eyes.

But the feeling of her lips against his doesn't come for a moment. Only a gasp. His eyes snap open and she is staring forward through glassy eyes. His eyes travel down her body, sucking in a breath as a large wound has opened up in her chest. Like someone drove a lightsaber through her body. 

He looks back at her eyes in panic as she places a weak hand to his cheek.

Obi-Wan awakens in a cold sweat, immediately bringing his hand to his cheek. The ghost feeling of her dream hand against his cheek still lingers, taunting him with the strange subject matter. The kisses, the fatal wound... it's not quite a vision, but it was a vivid dream for sure. A dream that puts a strange tingling in his stomach. 

He feels the desire to go find her. Make sure she's okay. It's a ridiculous sentiment considering he knows it was only a figment of his unconscious, but as he lays back down to try and sleep again he can't help but find himself wide awake and preoccupied. 

Obi-Wan wishes that dream was novel. Unfortunately, the only new part of it is that he saw her about to die. The rest... well... Not exactly a new concept that has been intrusive into his dreamland. 

It embarrasses him when he thinks about it. He shouldn't be dreaming about her in such a way. While they're similar in age and friends, he's still her handler. Obi-Wan tells himself it's just a physical thing. He's always found her attractive, even when she was still a criminal. 

He needs to stop thinking about it. Thinking about her. 

Then again, the vivid nature of the dream haunts him. 

Cursing, he kicks his covers off of him and gets out of bed. He likely won't be getting back to sleep anytime soon anyway so he slips his cloak on over his nightshirt and pants and combs through his hair with his fingers. Once he has some shoes on, he exits his quarters, wandering down the hall.

Her quarters are two halls over. He lingers nearby, deciding if he should actually knock and see if she's okay. 

He really should let her sleep.

It will bother him until he sees her next if he doesn't, though. 

Blast it. 

He steps forward, holding his fist up to knock when he stops. He can sense her Force signature ever so slightly. He feels her tranquil state-- she's likely sleeping. She doesn't seem to be in pain or dying. He drops his fist, stepping back from the door. 

Footsteps nearby. He curses again and starts walking back towards his quarters. None other than Captain Rex rounds the corner, looking surprised to see Obi-Wan. 

"Oh--General." 

"Hello, Captain Rex." Obi-Wan gives him a cordial smile before continuing on his way. As he passes the captain, who has an inquisitive look on his face, it dawns on Obi-Wan that her quarters are at the end of a dead-end. The other rooms aren't assigned. He pinches the bridge of his nose. Rex caught him walking away from her quarters, in his nightwear, in the middle of the sleeping shift.

Obi-Wan is absolutely not prepared for the questions Anakin will have when this gets back to him.


	7. You Just Want to Protect Me

Obi-Wan sits in the temple with his legs crossed in front of him, hands relaxed on his knees and his eyes shut in quiet meditation. After a morning full of meetings before his mission, he needed a little bit of time to center himself before departing. He's found it can be difficult to meditate on a Star Destroyer being so cut off from the living world.

Of course, he can't catch a break. Across the meditation room near the door the hushed voices of his padawan and his padawan's padawan bickering. 

"You're telling him," Ahsoka whispers.

"It was your idea!" Anakin huffs.

"You're his padawan."

"Well you're _my_ padawan and I'm telling you to tell him." 

"Listen here--"

Obi-Wan sighs, opening his eyes to see Ahsoka jabbing her finger into the center of Anakin's chest. 

"Tell me what?" Obi-Wan calls out. The knight and the padawan's heads snap in his direction, their eyes wide. Anakin pushes Ahsoka forward. 

"Ahsoka has something to tell you, Master." She turns to scold him but stops as Obi-Wan raises an eyebrow at her. 

"I, uh... _We_ just wanted to let you know that we booked the hotel room for your mission." 

"You mean _rooms_? 

Ahsoka pauses, her eyes flickering back to look at Anakin. 

"Well you see, we were thinking about it--"

" _Ahsoka_ was thinking about it." Anakin cuts in. Ahsoka glares at him. 

"Anakin and I _together_ were thinking about it and we thought it might be a good cover if you and Espy...uh...went on the mission as..."

"Newlyweds." Anakin finishes, watching Obi-Wan carefully. 

Damn kids. They hear about him hugging a woman _once_ decide they're meant to be entangled in some forbidden love affair. 

Obi-Wan pinches the bridge of his nose between his fingers. "Who in their right mind gave you two the responsibility of booking the room?" 

"Master Windu," Anakin says, the corner of his lip twitching like it does every time he lies. Obi-Wan raises an eyebrow. "One of the Republic Intelligence guys forgot to tell you before you left the briefing so he gave the contact to us."

"To give to you." Ahsoka pipes in. Anakin jabs her in the ribs with his elbow. 

"But we saw you were meditating so we wanted to help you out." 

"And then they asked what the occasion was." 

"You gotta admit it's not a bad cover." 

"Enough of that," Obi-Wan holds a hand to stop them. "Before I volunteer the both of you to teach younglings for the next month. I'm not pleased with this arrangement you've put me in, but it really isn't me you should be justifying your actions to." 

He stands from the floor, straightening his robes and starts towards the door. When he reaches Anakin he places a hand on his shoulder, looking at the young man with an amused smile. "You should be much more worried about what the _spy_ is going to say when she finds out you've hijacked her op." 

Ahsoka's eyes go wide and Anakin fights to maintain his smug expression but Obi-Wan can see the realization hit him. Troublesome as his padawans are, Obi-Wan is fairly tolerant of their antics. It's a fair trade: he looks the other way unless they are actually doing things he needs to step in on and he gets the privilege of bringing up their embarrassing moments without consequence for the rest of eternity. 

_She_ , on the other hand, has full control of the entirety of the 212th _and_ the 501st to do her bidding. Obi-Wand and Anakin may be their superiors, but she holds the power of having hundreds of men to help her pull her pranks and seek her revenge. 

It's quite amazing actually. Obi-Wan is constantly intrigued by her connection with them. For her birthday they got her a helmet with both blue and orange accents. He wouldn't be surprised if they managed to get her into full armor by her next birthday.

Obi-Wan leaves the two in the meditation room to go grab his things. It's just about time to leave for the mission. 

They received intel that there was a secret weapon being built by the Separatists. Their source led back to Canto Bight, a wealthy city on Cantonica in the Corporate Sector. One also notorious for massive weapons deals. 

The neutrality of the system made it nearly impossible for them to send a squad of troopers for backup. They would have nowhere to orbit or hide out. Obi-Wan joining her on the mission was the alternative. 

"Do they think I'm incapable after the whole Maul thing?" she asked him after the briefing. He could see the self-doubt in her eye. 

"Of course not. You handled yourself better than most on that mission." 

"I got kidnapped twice, Kenobi." 

"I don't think the second time qualified as kidnapping." 

She rolled her eyes, but a smile appeared on her lips. 

"Point is, you're absolutely not incapable. It's a precaution. Truthfully, I'm happy to get away from the battle for a few rotations." 

She elbowed him in the ribs. "Are you really referring to my job as your _break_?" 

"I'm saying there's 100% fewer battle droids and troublesome padawans involved, yes." 

They parted ways to go prepare. Obi-Wan headed to meditation and she went back to her apartment to pack her things. Though his meditation was for his own mental clarity, he spent the time until Anakin and Ahsoka interrupted him thinking about how she can possibly think she failed that mission when she stood head to head with a former Sith Lord and caused his retreat.

* * *

They met at the ship in the evening. She was there before him, her bag thrown in the hull and seated in the co-pilot seat with her feet up on the dash as she swiped through the files once more. When he entered she smiled at him warmly. Her ill feelings from earlier seemed to have worked themselves out. 

"Greetings," he plops down in the pilot seat and starts his checks. 

"How was meditating?" 

"Ahsoka and Anakin showed up."

"Kids these days," she says, imitating Obi-Wan's accent, "they just don't respect the art of meditation like they used to," 

"I don't sound like that," he chuckles. "And you're right, they don't." 

Obi-Wan starts the ship up and sends the clearance codes for takeoff. Coruscant becomes a tiny blip behind them in a matter of minutes. He gets in the hyperspace lane and she calculates the jump. 

"Two jumps. Entering coordinates." 

The computer beeps and the Obi-Wan presses the acceleration forward. The ship jolts into hyperspace and he sets controls to automated. 

With nothing to do, Obi-Wan is aware of the knot in his stomach once again. It's been there since he left Anakin and Ahsoka with the news of his... marriage. He hasn't told of her of this arrangement yet. He's not afraid of her as the other two are, no. That is not what is eating at him. 

It is most certainly the wedding bands in his pocket. 

Obi-Wan doesn't really remember his parents. He left his home on Stewjon when he was three to go to the Jedi Temple. He spent enough time at home to occasionally recognize the scent of his mother's perfume or taste of the fruit his father used to cut him for breakfast most mornings. His memories are fleeting, though. He doesn't remember the sound of their voices anymore, nor could he point them out of a lineup. 

Yet, he received a package a few cycles back. It was from his father. All it contained was a small cloth sack and a letter. The letter was brief. His mother had died ages ago and now his father had fallen ill. They have no other family and he wanted Obi-Wan to have these. When he opened the cloth sack it was their wedding bands. 

He thought it silly at first. His father sent a Jedi their rings. An attachment he would never be able to have. Yet, as he touched the rings his opinion changed. He could _feel_ the years of marriage engrained in those rings. Happiness and sadness. Anger and remorse. Pain and relief. It was like nothing he ever experienced before. It was almost overwhelming. He put them back in the satchel and hasn't touched them since.

Until now.

They feel heavy in his pocket, yet he feels nervous when he can't feel them. He keeps pushing his hand into his pocket to ensure they haven't moved. He knows she's noticed the pauses he's taking at times when he stops to check for them. She must think he's losing it. 

"Have you gone on many intelligence ops?" she asks, her eyes glancing at his hand re-entering his cloak pocket, but she doesn't linger there long. 

"A few. Not as many as you." 

"Experience sure comes fast working for the Republic. I feel as though I've aged 10 years."

"Wars age everyone quicker it seems." 

"No kidding. I'm pretty sure I saw a gray on Anakin the other day." 

"I wouldn't doubt that," Obi-Wan chuckles. The conversation fizzles out into a strange tension. He hopes she doesn't notice it, and it's all in his head. 

"Something on your mind, Obi-Wan?" She asks, using his first name which can only mean she's being sincere and not joking around. Dammit. He should just tell her. 

"It's nothing."

So much for telling her. She leans back in her chair, her eyebrows raising. "You're not telling me something." 

"It's nothing you need to know." Obi-Wan mentally scolds himself. His words are not lining up with his mind at all, making him sound like an ass.

"I beg to differ, _General_ Kenobi. You may outrank me on the battlefield but I'm the agent in charge of _this_ operation." 

"Oh, like you informed me of your associations with Jabba before walking into his damn lair?" 

Her clenched fist comes down hard on the arm of the chair. "That was still my op _,_ you _e chu ta._ You monitor my wellbeing but I approve and oversee my own operations and decide what is need to know."

"Don't you think I should have at least had some sort of clue?" 

"Are you really bringing this back up again?"

"I suppose I am." 

Her intense glare cuts into him. "Would you have let me go on the operation if you knew I was a slave?" 

"As a matter of fact, no. I would not have." 

"Then you wouldn't know that Maul is planning something. Or have found the mole in Republic. All because you wouldn't have trusted me to remain objective and do my job. Now tell me, Master Jedi, _did I_ remain objective and complete my mission?" 

He finds himself trapped by her question, his cheeks growing warm with embarrassment. 

"Did I?"

"Yes," he replies finally. "Yes, you did." 

"Then do me a favor and stop treating me like I'm still a street criminal." She stands suddenly, her lips pressed together tightly. He calls out her name as she storms back towards the door. 

"Please, I-I'm not trying to... I wasn't-- dammit just..." 

She stops at the door as he trails off, squeezing his knuckles white as he attempts to formulate his thoughts in some sort of apologetic manner. She lets out a deep, shaky breath, still facing the open door. 

Slowly turning she looks at him, the anger fading more into a pained expression. "You were the first person I ever told of my past. I trust you, Obi-Wan. Don't throw that back in my face." 

She leaves, storming off towards the quarters of the ship. 

Obi-Wan rests his heads in his hands, grabbing a handful of his own hair and clenching it in his fist in frustration. She just... drives him crazy sometimes. In a way where he loses head and he doesn't know why. Obi-Wan remained stoic against criminals, murderers, and even politicians. How is it that she evokes such a strong response from him? 

He gets up, walking back towards the quarters. He stops at hers, the door open as he peers into the small room. She sits on the bunk on the far side of the room, her back against the wall and legs drawn into her chest. Her eyes flicker to his presence, but her blank facial expression remains emotionless. She's shut him out. 

"I began teaching Anakin as a young boy," her head cocks slightly in confusion but she listens. "We found him on Tatooine. He was sold into slavery to the Hutts with his mother. My master freed him, and he began training as my padawan," Obi-Wan slowly steps into the room. "As he got older, that anger of his childhood hasn't gone away. He gets emotional and irrational at times. I was always hard on him about it. We didn't talk about what was bothering him. I didn't stop to consider what I could be missing." 

He reaches her bunk, looking at the space beside her. She nods slightly, and he sits down on the edge of the bed. "I'm still trying to find that balance between being Anakin's master and his friend. I know he hides things from me and I know I should have done better from the start. The point of telling you this is that I do trust you. You've proven your allegiance to the Republic and the Order and you've more than proven to me of your abilities as an operative. I just..." 

"You just want to protect me." 

"I do. I did not mean to offend you." 

He sits next to her as silence falls between them like a blanket rather than the strained static of earlier. He feels lighter, in a way. He hadn't ever voiced his concerns for Anakin aloud.

"I'm not used to having other people look out for me," she says quietly "Most of my life was having other people dictate what I could and couldn't do. What to wear, what to eat. Where to go. I guess I unconsciously transferred the resentment I had for my masters onto those giving me orders... so, onto you." 

Obi-Wan was going about this all wrong. His intentions were right but now he's done the opposite of his efforts to be more sensitive. "I truly am sorry for my foolishness."

"Your foolishness is acknowledged," a small smile appears on her lips. "And is pardoned." 

He smiles back at her as relief rushes through him. He didn't realize he was holding his breath.

"We should probably check on the ship. We can't be far from that second jump. They stand from the bunk and start walking back towards the cockpit. 

Obi-Wan's mind immediately falls back to the source of his outburst in the first place-- blast it, he _still_ has to tell her about the marriage scheme.

Maybe severely pissing her off and discrediting her wasn't the best preface to a fake marriage proposal. 


	8. To a Long and Happy Marriage

"There's something I need to tell you about this mission," Obi-Wan says, leaning against the doorframe of her quarters. He nervously twists the ends of his hair.

"What is it?" 

"I had Anakin and Ahsoka call and make the reservations for us. And well... they seemed to have taken it upon themselves to tell the hotel reservation staff that we are coming here on our honeymoon."

She bursts out laughing. Obi-Wan rolls his eyes as the nervousness is suddenly released from his shoulders at her reaction.

"I didn't expect the thought of marrying me to be so _hilarious_." 

"It is... I mean, it's not." She steps forward and places a hand on his forearm. "You'd be a wonderful husband, Kenobi. You have to admit the situation is funny though. And not a bad cover." 

"I suppose, but I'm still going to have the two of them washing starships until they are older than Yoda." He sighs and pulls a box out of his pocket. "Anyways, here is your ring." Obi-Wan opens it up to reveal the glimmering wedding band that once belonged to his mother. Her eyes widen as she picks up the box carefully, plucking it out of the cushion and rotating it around to examine it. Obi-Wan realizes as she holds it that not everyone has the same size fingers. Shit. 

She slips it onto her ring finger and he lets out a breath of relief. It fits perfectly.

"It's gorgeous." 

Obi-Wan picks up a second ring that is underneath the cushion of the first. A similar band but without the stone. He puts it on, staring at it with a blank expression. The metal feels strange wrapped around his finger. He flexes, finding no hindrance to his mobility. It too fits perfectly.

"What is it?" She asks. He looks up at her, ignoring the phantom taste of jogan fruit on his tongue-- a faraway memory. 

"Nothing. I just... It's weird to see this on my own finger. The Jedi code forbids attachments and well... Marriage is the greatest of attachments." 

"Well," She loops her arm into his and pulls him into the corridor. "it may be fake, but at least now you can get the experience. Even if it's just with me." 

_Even if it's just with me_. He can't hide the look of surprise that crosses his features. She says things like this a lot. Random statements that discredit or downplay herself or her abilities. She often jokes around with prideful statements of how skillful she is with things or how hilarious she is, but Obi-Wan has caught on is that is just what those statements are-- jokes. It's the little things that creep out from between the cracks of her shell that reveal her true feelings. In this case, she really thinks she is not a viable option for a life-partner.

There are so many things he wants to tell her. That she's intelligent and witty and strong. That she inspires him by what she's overcome and her propensity to get the job done. That she's quite beautiful and charismatic. He can tell many of the clones harbor crushes on her. Her laugh makes him smile and her smile lifts his mood. She's a wonderful friend, loyal, and a good listener. 

He wants to tell her that any man would be lucky to have her. That just because he _can't_ marry her, doesn't mean he wouldn't _want_ to. 

The last statement rings in his head. Like it came from somewhere external to his mind. He shakes it off, not in the mindset to analyze his own intrusive thoughts at the moment. 

* * *

They reach the hotel, and Obi-Wan is immediately amazed at the lavish decorations, trying not to think about the cost of the place. After spending so much time sleeping in battlefield campsites and the cramped quarters of Star Destroyers, this is certainly going to be a change. Anakin is going to be so jealous.

She goes to stake out the exits and layout of the main floor while Obi-Wan approaches the check-in desk. A human woman stands behind wearing a formal business suit. 

"How may I help you?" 

"We are--my wife and I are checking in," he says.

"Name?"

"Should be under Kenobi." 

She rifles through the holonet form. "Ben?" 

Obi-Wan nods, and she hands him a keycard. "Ah, the newlyweds. We're so happy you've decided to spend your special days with us! We have a ocean-view queen room for you." 

"Right, of course. Thank you." 

"You're in room 512, Mr. Kenobi," she gives him a knowing smile that makes Obi-Wan a little uncomfortable. "Enjoy yourselves." 

His cheeks burn as he returns to her. They walk to the lift. He can feel her examining him closely. 

"What now?" 

"One bed." 

"Well, of course, it's a honeymoon after all. Never been married but I do suspect people on their honeymoon don't tend to sleep in twin beds." 

"You're... okay with it?" 

"So long as you don't snore."

They reach the room and Obi-Wan unlocks the door. Before he opens it he gives his a mischievous smile. "Should I... carry you over the threshold?" 

"Shut the hell up, Kenobi." 

She pushes past him and enters the room before he can scoop her up. The room is nice, much nicer than anywhere he's stayed before. He whistles as he examines the sparkling fresher and the large comfy-looking bed. She stares out the balcony at the rolling waves of the ocean before turning around. Obi-Wan is doing a quick sweep of listening devices when she gets his attention by waving around a bottle of wine. 

"Look what we have."

"You do realize we aren't actually on our honeymoon right?" 

"Well obviously, but it would be irresponsible of us to let this go to waste." 

Obi-Wan crosses his arms and gives her a stern look. She suddenly lowers the bottle and underhand tosses it across the room at him. He catches it, looking at the label. It's a nice bottle. Not overly expensive, but not the average bottle that can be found in any wine aisle. 

"Live a little," she says, coming closer to him. "Plus we don't have to begin until morning. Sharing a bottle of wine isn't going to even get us tipsy." 

"We could be going over routes, plans--"

"We did that yesterday." She reaches out and takes the bottle back, popping the cork before he can protest. "Now I can drink this whole thing myself, and I will do _happily_. Or you can join me." 

"This feels like peer pressure, you know." Obi-Wan smiles as she pours two glasses of wine.

"It's what us regular folk call a Jedi Mind Trick." 

Obi-Wan chuckles, as she hands him a glass of the sparkling wine. "To a long and happy marriage," he says, clinking the glass against hers. 

Wine is not Obi-Wan's usual drink of choice. He is more of a liquor man, only indulging in wine when it is put in front of him. It's a classy drink for sure though, and he appreciates how it doesn't burn as it goes down. That is a blessing and a curse. 

From the first sip, he can feel the warmth of the sparkling wine spread through him. He remembers that wine always makes his cheeks rosy and flushed. That's another reason he prefers to stay away from it. It makes him feel like a young padawan again, reminding him of the diplomatic missions Qui-Gon and him used to have to go on. 

"I don't believe I've had wine in years," she says wistfully. 

"When was the last time you remember having it?" 

She thinks for a moment, sitting down on the edge of the bed. "I was second mate in a small delivery ship that brought shipments of exotic fruit to the markets. I was in charge of ensuring we got paid the right amount or negotiating if there was trouble since I knew most of the languages of our sector of planets. We were leaving from...oh I don't even remember. We were leaving somewhere when a stowaway tried to hijack the ship. He killed one of the crew members and had the captain at blaster point. I happened to be in a good position and stunned him. We had a long-running joke about the first one to have to fire their blaster would earn a bottle of wine. So the guys got me a bottle of plum wine at our next stop." She smiles at the memory, taking a long swig of her glass. 

"So that's what you were doing before coming to Coruscant?"

"That was my..." she counts on her fingers. "Fourth job. The first three were small crew positions. Mostly smuggler ships but they didn't tell us that. This one was my first one when I came to Coruscant, and it sent me right back out into space." 

"Why did you leave it?" 

"Turns out the crates weren't actually full of meilooruns and muja fruit. Found _that_ out when a squad of eccentric pirates took over the ship in order to steal our shipment of _spice_." 

Obi-Wan scoffs, sitting down next to her on the bed. "Let me guess, the leader was one named Hondo?" 

She looks surprised. "How'd you know?"

"Lucky guess. I've dealt with him a time or two." 

"Well anyway, I thought I was doing actual work, not making drug deals, so I left after my crew got jettisoned from our own ship on an escape pod and picked up by a Trade Federation ship, I took a shuttle back to Coruscant. I tried tending a cantina, waitressing, but it all just wasn't right." 

"May I ask how you wound up where I found you?" Obi-Wan asks carefully. She's alluded to this part of her life a few times, but he was never entirely sure of what led to it. He feels now knowing her for much longer and being on as good a terms as they are, it may be finally time to ask. She hesitates at his question, finishing her glass of wine and standing back up to pour another. Her back is turned to him as the sparking liquid pours into her glass. 

"I got hungry." She turns around, her gaze hardened. "I ran out of credits, got kicked out of my housing unit. I couldn't find a job and after a week of an empty cupboard and living off whatever I could buy with the money from pawning the last of my belongings I cracked. I..." she looks down, rubbing the rim of the glass with her thumb. "I figured out that if I did myself up and hung out in upper-level cantinas, I could usually pick a few pockets, get a free meal out of the exchange." 

Obi-Wan recalls the first time they met she was acting drunk and ended up stealing from a wealthy young man. "You seemed to be good at that." 

She sits back down on the bed. "It's quite a horrible feeling to find out the only thing you're good at is illegal." 

"I think you turned things around in the end." 

She smiles. "Somehow, all thanks to you." 

"You would have found your way eventually."

"I'm not quite sure of that." 

He continues this back and forth of asking her about her past and she was surprisingly open about it. After another two glasses, she managed to turn it on him. He demonstrated to her his ability to make the bottle float across the room to refill her glass, which made him feel silly to be using the Force in such an impractical way, but the way she smiled at him made it quite worth it. Plus, the heat in his cheeks indicated that he had hit the sweet spot of drinking enough in a short period of time to find himself tipsy-- tipsy enough to fall off the bed laughing when she started doing a dramatic reenactment of Anakin, Ahsoka, and Rex attempting to take over Obi-Wan's usual post-battle duties when he was unfortunately indisposed due to getting blown off a tank that was rigged with thermal detonators.

"You always manage to find yourself in the most precarious of situations, you know that?"

"I always have them under control." 

"You were nearly blown up! You spent three days in a bacta tank." 

He leans back against the wall, folding his legs in front of him. She is lying on the bed, her head handing upside off of it to look at him while her empty glass rests loosely in her hand. He resists the urge to reach out and brush his fingers through her hair... it's not an impulse he's ever had before and he blames it on the alcohol. 

"That's not nearly as close to the craziest thing I've done. Especially since Anakin came along." 

"Like what?" 

He considers the wide array of wild missions he's found himself in. Surrendering on Christophsis to buy Anakin time, pretty much every moment of the Battle of Geonosis was quite notable. 

"I once jumped through a window to get an assassin droid." 

"How far up were you." 

He thinks about it a moment. "A hundred or so, possibly." 

She blinks in disbelief.

"And you just jumped straight through the window?" 

"I had to get that droid!" 

"By jumping through a window? I thought Anakin was the reckless one." 

"Who do you think practically raised the boy for ten years?"

And then she laughs and it makes him smile wider than he has in a long time. She rolls over, her eyes locking with his. Her tangled hair drops into her face but she doesn't seem to take notice of it. 

"You're staring," he says, a bit more flirtatiously than he would have liked, but he's only partially to blame for that.

"This is Obi-Wan Kenobi in rare form, I mustn't let myself forget this moment."

He doesn't admit that he too is taking mental snapshots of these moments as well. He wants to remember this light feeling in his chest and the buzz that spreads through his body making him feel warm and invincible. 

He mustn't get too comfortable, though. It's late and there's work to do. He stands up, much to her disappointment... and his own... and they get ready for bed. She of course, doesn't allow him to take the floor. It's not worth arguing with her about it and he's truthfully a little relieved to not have to sleep on the carpet when the bed looks as comfortable as it does. As he lays in it, it definitely is the most comfortable thing he's ever gotten to sleep in. 

He grows drowsy quite quickly. He hones in on her steady breath. She's close enough he can feel the dip of the mattress and a tiny bit of her body heat, but they maintain their distance. It sort of reminds him of when Anakin was very young still and he would wander into Obi-Wan's room. Tears would usually be brimming over his eyes and he would tug on the edge of Obi-Wan's sleep shirt until he awoke and groggily lifted his blankets for his young padawan to slide into bed with him. Sometimes he would tell Obi-Wan of his nightmare or what was keeping him awake. Other times he would go right back to sleep. 

Sometimes these were the nights Obi-Wan slept the most sound. The feeling of another person so close-- especially one he constantly has to watch over through his training-- helped him not center on his anxieties for a night. He knew Anakin was right there next to him, safe and sound. He gets that same satisfaction from having her here. 

Sleep finds him quickly, pulling him under into a dreamless slumber.

* * *

The first to sleep and the first to wake. His eyes flutter open at the vibration of his wrist com. He set an alarm the night before. The first thing he notices is that there is no longer two dips in the mattress, but one large one in the center of the bed. 

In the night, it seems they had gravitated towards one another. She lays on her side facing him, fast asleep, hair going in every direction. He's close enough that if he leans forward at all their noses would touch. Her legs are pressed into his, and her arms are curled between them, her top arm laying over his hand. Their proximity surprises him as he processes it for a moment, ever so carefully pulling his legs back and his arms away from hers. She stirs slightly but remains in a deep sleep. 

He goes to get out of bed to let her continue her slumber for a few more minutes but stops. Drawing back allowed him to see her more fully and he can't stop staring at her blissfully peaceful sleep. The lines in her face are gone and her jaw is relaxed, making her look young. Untouched by the horrors of her life. He indulges at this moment to just examine her without her watchful eye criticizing him. 

She really is quite beautiful. 

With that he forces himself to get out of bed, cursing the allowance of his mind to wander in such a way. 

As he washes his face and trims his beard he reminds himself that he is only unable to form attachments. There is nothing that prevents him from being attracted to people. 

He refutes his own argument as he chooses his outfit for the day. Attractions to a coworker, someone he works closely with, is an attachment in itself. He can't let himself do that. He stares down at the clothes he packed. They're a deep blue, a softer material than his usual Jedi robes. With black pants, belt, and black boots he hasn't seen himself in colors other than beige in quite awhile. 

He's slipping on the tunic when he hears her waking. He has her back to him, but he can feel her eyes on his exposed back. He speeds his dressing, turning around to see her drowsily looking at him.

"Apologies, I thought you were asleep."

"I am asleep." she says into her pillow.

"I see. Well, it's time to get up anyway. We have a brunch date." 

She groans, pulling her body up. Her voice is raspy and low. 

"On my actual honeymoon, there will be no getting out of bed until at least late afternoon."

"Duly noted." He says, rolling his eyes. He slips on his outer layer. "Can you be ready in an hour?" 

"Please, I can be ready in half an hour." 

She slips out of bed, heading into the fresher. He hears the water start in the shower and finishes getting ready. Obi-Wan steps in front of the mirror and looks at himself. It's jarring to see himself in colored robes. He feels like a politician-- probably because it was Padmé that gifted him these a few cycles back. She certainly has an eye for fashion. 

The longer he looks, the more he likes the blue hue. It reminds him of the deep waters of an ocean planet. He must say it complements his skin tone as well, though it makes his auburn hair look redder than usual. 

He suspects she will take a little longer than the half an hour she promised, so he makes the bed and folds up his night clothes. With the room now orderly he sits on the bed to meditate. 

Obi-Wan has quite a bit to contemplate too. He often has to work through the thoughts and feelings he gets after a night of drinking. They tend to pool in his psyche, only to be left of him to deal with in the morning. Yet another reason he tends to keep his alcohol intake to a minimum. 

He also has this strange feeling about today. There's this air of uncertainty surrounding him that he doesn't necessarily like. The Force is warning him of something and he is not sure of what. On one hand, it may mean they are close to their objective. On the other hand, it also could mean danger. 

He hears the fresher door open and footsteps approaching. He opens his eyes to see her standing near the front hall, looking quite shy and grabbing at her clothing. He holds back the urge his jaw has to drop. 


	9. Blue Really is Your Color

He's never seen her wear a dress. Or have her hair done in anything else but a style practical for combat at any moment. For as hesitant as she seems standing halfway between the fresher and the main room, he can see her chin high and shoulders back with confidence. She feels as beautiful as she looks. 

The dress itself is quite simple. A light blue one that is more fitted above her waist and flowing down where the hem licks the floor when she walks. Dainty straps cascade in gentle loops off her shoulders. 

Before he can compliment her, he's distracted by her own gaze running up and down his own abnormal attire. He looks down at it, suddenly unsure of the outfit. 

"What... I'm not really sure about them--"

"Blue really is your color."

He looks up at her, stunned at the genuine compliment so much he believes she's making fun of him. She seems to notice his unsure expression.

"It looks good, Obi-Wan. Plus, we match," she says, gesturing down to her own dress. There are so many things he'd like to say to her. So many compliments he could give, but he holds his tongue. Once he begins admiring her radiance, he's not sure he will be able to stop. 

"Padmé?" he asks, shifting the tone to something more quippy.

"Does this look like something I'd have hiding in the back of my closet?" 

"Not particularly." he chuckles, standing up and offering his arm to her. "Ready for the day, darling?" 

"Of course, _Ben,_ my dear." She says, her cheeks growing a tad redder than they were a moment ago. 

They go to brunch. It's a lovely set-up in the main dining room. Even in his nicer clothes, he feels underdressed compared to the other life forms in the room. As soon as they enter the room, walking arm-in-arm, Obi-Wan begins identifying the essentials-- all the exits, possible suspects, the closest possible makeshift weapon, and a way out. They sit, the first thing out of her mouth the same list of priorities-- including her initial suspicion of their target. 

She's impressive for sure. Her skills and intuition have certainly grown since her first missions. She is so much more relaxed now, just going with the flow. He can feel the way the Force surrounds her, humming with life and harmony. He's not sure how she's managed it, but he notices she has her Force signature under control. It's drawn in, only there because he knows to look for it.

The first course is served. It's beautifully plated and looks absolutely delicious. The grandeur of it reminds him of the more high-profile diplomatic missions he's been on. He takes his first bite, guilt coursing through him at just how good the food is.

"We are certainly living the high life for this one." he sighs.

"Listen, we wouldn't be able to hold any credibility if we walked around in our issued clothes and ate on rations. This is the best way to get information quickly, which is what we need." 

"I know it still feels strange, though." 

"For a slave and a Jedi, no wonder." 

For some reason, her words hit him wrong. While he usually lets the things she says like this slip, he can see the twitch of her lip into a frown, like she's remembering her duties. Or the mission to Tatooine he sent her on where she had to resume that life. 

"You're not a slave. Not anymore," he says in a low voice. It comes out more stern than he intended. She stops midbite, setting down her fork and looking at him with a neutral expression that is far more unsettling than any anger she could have thrown at him.

"Well, I know that. I was one though." 

"Yes, but don't insult who you've become by quantifying yourself by your past. You're brilliant at what you do." 

He's had this on his mind for so long. Every time she belittles herself back to just an orphan finding her way in the world he just wants to remind of her of how far she's come. IT sounds so stupid actually coming out of his mouth. He's telling her things she already knows-- of course it's stupid. Obi-Wan immediately regrets allowing himself this outburst. 

" _Ben,"_ her emphasis of his undercover name sends a chill down his spine. He's acting so unprofessional he feels like he could fold in on himself. "I know what you're trying to say, but I don't think--," Her gaze moves behind him as she trails off for a moment. He resists the urge to follow where she is looking. He can see the gears turning in her head like she does when she's coming up with a plan. "I don't think I want to speak about this right now. Don't follow me, I need a moment." 

She stands, quickly departing from the table and heading in the direction of the bar. 

"Well," Obi-Wan says to himself. "That went about as bad as it could have." 

* * *

She forgives him. She seems to have to do that a lot. Especially when his nonsensical thoughts decide they must be heard before he can censor them. Those also seem to stumble out without permission around her more often too. 

She made a friend though. The female associate of targets. Her approach was quite bold and possibly suspicious, but for the time being it's something. He has enough to send a recon droid after them to track their movements. 

They return to the room. While he monitors the droid she stands out on the balcony, gazing at the ocean. Anakin used to do the same whenever they were on water planets-- really, any planets that had flora other than sand. After seeing the motif of longing for a world beyond the desert in so many people he's come across, Obi-Wan is fairly sure he never wants to live on a desert planet. He quite enjoys the aesthetics of a water feature or even an urban setting. 

The woman-- Arden-- split off from the dealer. He orders the droid to follow the dealer. The man heads up into what he figures to be the towers opposite to the one they are in. He reaches a high floor...maybe nine?... and takes out a digital card scanner. 

"Where are you going?" Obi-Wan says to himself. The camera's shift and he's inside the room. It's another hotel room, but it looks uninhabited. The man walks out onto the balcony, pulling out a scope. 

The realization dawns on him. He shifts the camera so it is facing out in the direction the man is looking and zooms in. 

_Shit_. 

He stands, putting his equipment out of view of the window. He runs his fingers through his hair a few times and loosens his tunic. Obi-Wan is not quite sure _why_ he's doing this, but it seems right for the part. He steps onto the balcony.

 _Just be_ _confident._ _Act like this is the most natural thing in the world._

He steps right behind her, trapping her between his chest and the railing, a gentle hand on her waist. She sucks in a slight breath at the contact but stays still for the most part. She even seems to lean into his touch. 

"I take it your friend may have had some suspicions of you. We're being watched." 

With this information, she slowly twists in his arms. He now has both his hands on her waist. Her hands drag up his chest until they settle behind his neck. Like they're slow dancing lazily but there is not sway to their movement. Just holding one another. 

"What do we do?" she asks, though he gets the feeling she already has a fully thought out plan in mind. 

"I thought this was your territory." 

"You're not going to like my answer, Kenobi." 

"Try me." 

"If they're watching us then they may be checking to see if we are who we say we are. Which means we have to play up the newlywed act." 

"You're right, I don't like your answer."

She runs one hand slowly down the neckline of his tunic and then back up again. On the way back up she ever so slightly caresses his cheek with her thumb and forefinger before returning her hand behind his neck.

He can feel his blood pressure rise from that alone.

"People like this are paranoid but money-hungry," she says in a voice that sounds like it's meant to be whispering dirty things in his ear, but instead it's used to explain the psychology of their target... he hates how attractive he is finding this. The control within him is very quickly unraveling. "We just have to be moderately convincing and they will take it at face value, especially if we don't threaten their buy." 

"Okay... fine. How do we do this?" 

"Pretend to seduce me to come back inside and then shut the blinds. They will assume the rest." 

He nearly chokes on his own tongue. 

"Why do _I_ have to seduce you?" 

"Kenobi I swear to--"

"Fine." he huffs, tightening his grip on her waist so she's drawn in closer to him. "Come on in, now."

She chuckles at his half-hearted attempt, furthering the torment by turning back around towards the ocean.

"You don't know what you're doing at all, do you?"

Suddenly pride takes over, and Obi-Wan's control that has been so quickly waning all morning suddenly disappears. 

He steps closer to her, her back now flush against his chest. He drags his hands around her body until one rests across her stomach, his fingers spread out, gripping at the fabric of her dress ever so slightly. Her breath hitches at his movement, giving him confirmation that he's by the grace of the Force doing _something_ right. With his other hand, he takes her lead from earlier and drags his fingers from where it sat so comfortably on her waist up the side of her body. He traces the curve of her waist, the dip below her shoulder blade, and the smooth skin of her shoulder. He crosses his arm to the other side, looping it over her hair and pushing it to the side to expose her neck. 

Goosebumps punctuate her skin as he breathes cool air over it, dipping down to press a gentle kiss just below her ear. The contact creates this electricity between him and her, the crackling in the air nearly palpable.

She draws in a breath that's somewhere between a gasp and a moan. The very sound of it causes warmth to spread from his fingertips to low in his stomach.

"How is that?" he whispers in her ear, letting his lips brush against her ear lobe. He can feel her breath ragged and shallow. It makes him feel better that she too is struggling to hold it together. 

"Who the _hell_ taught you how to do this?" 

To be honest, Obi-Wan is just as surprised at his actions as she must be. He didn't even think, he's just _doing._ Every part of this is pure instinct-- instinct he did not realize he had. 

She finally turns around to face him. Her cheeks are more flushed than he's ever seen and he immediately notices the distinct dilation of her eyes as she gazes up at him. 

And then she touches him and he feels like his legs might give out. It's just her hand to his cheek, but it's so intimate and lovely that he can hardly process it. Her other hand rests on his chest right over his heart. As her fingers run along the junction of where his beard ends, he takes that hand on his heart and holds it up to his lips, pressing a kiss to it. A new round of goosebumps run up her arm. If she could see his skin under his sleeve she would be able to see he has a matching set. 

As he kisses her hand they lock eyes and the world tunnels. All he can see is her standing before him, staring at him with her lips slightly parted and her chest rising and falling at a faster than usual rate. While there is not much else he can see... what he can _feel_ is an entirely different story. Never in his life has he felt the Force feel the way it does in this moment. It's like he's floating, the Force that flows in both of them suddenly forming these channels between the two of them with every point of contact. He can feel the shock and nervousness and the _longing_ that is occupying her thoughts at this moment, yet he also can see that these are just the underlying feelings. The same feelings that he is dealing with. 

He blinks and everything has changed. He's holding her in his arms, one arm looped under her knees and his other cradling her back. Stars they're so close. He is getting lost in her eyes and he needs to focus. He tries to look elsewhere, only to find his new fixation upon her lips, and suddenly he can't think about anything else besides imagining what it would be like to kiss those lips.

Obi-Wan is so close. Just a few centimeters away. He wonders if the Force around them will just combust. That's the way it feels anyway. 

Before he can move, she beats him to it. She closes the distance, but her lips do not touch his. Rather, they press against one of his cheek. And then the other. "Go inside," she says, her voice hitching slightly as she presses her forehead against his. 

And suddenly he sobers, recalling where he is and what he's supposed to be doing, and the _mission_ that is slipping his hormonal mind. He carries her back inside, taking two large steps in before releasing her onto the bed where she bounces against the mattress. He turns around and closes the door, snapping the curtains shut. Darkness replaces the light of the room, and he's eternally grateful that she can't see the blush that has got to be covering his entire face at this moment and the unwanted guest that is thankfully concealed by the bagginess of his tunic. 

"I'm sorry," he says, realizing his damn voice is an _octave_ lower. 

"For what? I think you did a good job. Maybe too good." there's a pause in her voice. A playfulness. "When did seduction get added to the Jedi curriculum?"

He laughs, more out his own necessity to ease the tension than the irony of her joke. It still helps. His mind slows down and he feels the heat in his cheeks start to fade. Suddenly realizing how dark the room is he flips on the desk light. 

She's sitting on the bed, propped up on her elbows. The strap of her dress is still dropped off her shoulder-- his own doing in the midst of his attempt at "seduction". She looks about as flustered as he does. It relieves him even more. He just looks at her and she stares back as if they're making the wordless agreement to not speak of _that_ moment ever again. When the silent agreement is made he cracks a smile, finally responding to her initial quip.

"It is strictly an extra credit skill." 

* * *

A lot can happen in a few hours. Especially on missions such as these. 

For instance, Obi-Wan certainly didn't expect to wake up with a pounding headache, a throbbing in his neck, and a ringing in his ears.

For a moment, he was a bit disoriented. He felt drowsier than usual, and his connection to the Force seemed dull. His heavy eyes shut once again before opening again. What time is it? Why didn't he change into nightclothes? Is she also--

As his mind goes to her it all comes flooding back. 

Going to the bar. Running into Arden and her boyfriend Diric. Getting invited to an exclusive gambling event. Espy being an absolute _champ_ at Pazaak. 

And then things get a little foggier. Coming back to the room. He remembers holding her hand as they walked through the streets. They both had the slightest buzz of intoxication that brought a welcomed warmth through them. It was a successful night. They had some solid leads to follow now. 

And then-- 

He shoots up from his supine position, trying to stand but getting caught on the blanket. He stumbles forward, but she is there, catching his downward progress with strong hands supporting his shoulders. She sits him back down on the bed, immediately wrapping her arms around him in a tight embrace. 

Arden was here. She held Obi-Wan at blaster point before injecting him with something that made the world spin and then go black. The last thing he saw was her eyes wide and her mouth open like she was screaming but there was no sound. Only the sound of his own heartbeat and a ringing in his ears. Even as the world went black he could feel the fear through the Force and he fought hard against the world that was quickly disappearing from his grasp to reach her. 

And then he couldn't push through it and he felt the nauseating feeling of falling and falling until all was still and dark. The moment he had lived in before was but an echo, dwindling as it grew further and further. 

Now that he's conscious once again all he can see is her face at that moment before he fell. He has a feeling that look is going to haunt him.

"What has happened? Are you alright? Where did she go?" he blurts out in rapid succession. She brings her palms to his cheeks and her fingers press against his temples softly. 

"Obi-Wan, take a breath." 

"Arden was here. Sh-she drugged me." 

'Yes, and now she's gone." 

This gets his attention. He searches her face. Does she mean... _gone_ gone or... 

"Did you..."

"I didn't kill her, no." 

His tensed shoulders drop in relief. 

"Well, what happened?" 

"She thought we were jeopardizing the sale of a weapon. She was here to... _discourage_ us from going to the presentation."

"She does realize I denied that invitation right?" 

"Yes, that's what I told her. She didn't seem to buy that. I managed to turn the blaster on her and we talked it out. Made a deal." 

Obi-Wan raises an eyebrow. "What kind of deal?" 

"Arden would show me the plans to the weapon and we would leave as soon as you came to. No interfering with the presentation." 

"You saw the plans then?"

She stands up from her crouched position, a sly smile on her face. She presses a button on the holocomputer and a crude outline of a large orb comes up. Obi-Wan stands to get a closer look.

"I have something better. I copied them to your computer. They're crude plans, but they are something." 

He stares at the blueprints in disbelief. This is... far better than he thought they would get from this mission. 

I must send these to the council at once. What language is this written in?" 

"Geonosian, I believe." 

"Of course," he says, the buzz of those blasted bugs forever engrained in his mind. "I shall transmit these then." 

"We can do that on the ship." 

"The ship?" 

"Part of the deal was leaving as soon as you recovered. I intend to keep my word." 

He looks at her through the glow of the hologram. She seems calm again now. That feeling of fear he felt before he was rendered unconscious not evident in her signature anymore. She acts like the entire endeavor was just routine negotiations and she didn't spend part of it staring down the barrel of a blaster. 

Maybe Obi-Wan is rubbing off on her a little too much. 

"Very well. Let's pack our things." 

As he's putting his things into his bag, pulling out his usual Jedi robes, Obi-Wan can't help but wish they had just one more night. Despite his earlier feelings of guilt over the lavish conditions, he knows he will soon be sent back to the cold confines of his Star Destroyer quarters. Dipping his toes in the comfort of this mission is going to make that bunk seem ten times as hard and cold. 

Of course, that is his duty. To live humbly, serve the galaxy. 

He glances across the room as she slips that blue dress into her bag with the utmost care. She's already back in her usual clothes, hair pulled back from her face, and any makeup wiped clean. Another identity fading away as she returns to her usual one. 

She catches him looking at her, giving him a small smile. 

They head back to the ship. The council commends them on the mission, having gone over the plans of the mysterious Geonosian weapon. As soon as the call ends she retires. 

He stares out at the flashing lights of hyperspace. The navicomputer has him taking a different route back to Coruscant. Only one jump, but double the time in hyperspace. Maybe he does get one more night. 

Then something hits Obi-Wan like a brick wall. It's a cocktail of exhaustion, fear, and relief. His chest feels tight. It takes him a moment to realize it isn't him feeling this way, but her feelings getting projected through the ship. 

He ensures the autopilot is on and then goes to find her. 

The door to her quarters is still open. He peers into it, finding her laying on the bed, her hand dangling in front of her face as she examines the ring. His mother's ring. 

He wishes he could remember her wearing it. Hell, he wishes he knew what she looked like. What she sounded like. What it felt like to have her hold him. 

"It was my mother's," he says, careful not to startle her. By the way, she flips over to look at him with wide, eyes, he's not sure he succeeded. "They were given to me after their death." 

The admission falls off his tongue easier than he expected it to. He's never spoken of his parents before. Not even to Anakin, really, besides telling him what his home planet was. 

"I'm sorry," she says as she sits up, her voice hoarse and cracking... like she's crying. This alarms him. He enters the room, crouching down in front of her. Little lines where tears left their trail trace down the contours of her cheeks. One drips off her jaw, making a tiny stain on her shirt. He reaches out, gently brushing a tear off her cheek. She seems surprised by his action.

"What is it?" 

Her eyes don't meet his at first. She just seems distant and lost. He reaches out with the Force and feels the waves of tiredness. Her hands shake and her body is cold. 

She opens her mouth to speak, but words don't come out. More tears build in her eyes. 

Obi-Wan understands what is going on. It's the dump after a mission. The realization that everything that just happened actually happened and the body and brain finally process all the fucked up things that occurred. It's painful and exhausting and just enough to occupy the mind so that it's nearly impossible to actually rest until the tears stop flowing or they drive the body into a forced sleep. 

Obi-Wan also knows what he always longs for when these moments hit him particularly hard. He opens his arms and she leans forward into him. The dams break and she sobs into him, wrapping her arms tight around his body and burying her face in his shoulder. He gathers her up, flipping them around so he's now sitting on the bed and she's cradled in her lap. 

She clutches a piece of his tunic in her fist, much like a young Anakin used when he would break down. 

And like Obi-Wan would do as a padawan himself. Somehow feeling his master's tunic in his grasp grounded him. Qui-Gon used to rub circles on his back until Obi-wan would calm down. He starts doing this for her.

Time passes and he can feel her breaths begin to slow and the sobs become nothing more than the occasional gasp for breath. He continues holding her close as her chest rises and falls at a more regulated rate and her grip loosens. He carefully looks down to find her eyes closed.

And now he faces an option. Qui-Gon used to lay Obi-Wan down at this point and he would sleep soundly through the night. 

Obi-Wan usually did the same for Anakin, though when what was bothering him was particularly scary to the boy, he would lay there with him. Obi-Wan can lay her down and go... 

or he can stay. 

The decision should be an easy one, yet he's finding himself hesitating. He tries to think about what she would tell him to do if she were awake. The events of the previous day do not seem to help. She encouraged him to sleep in the bed with her yet she stopped him from kissing her on the balcony. 

_To keep him from breaking the code._ The realization hits him over the head. He could feel her desire though the Force like she was verbalizing it to him, yet her action confused him at the time. It seemed the opposite of what he knew she was feeling. She wasn't letting him get lost in the moment. She took his out of control moment and took control for him. 

Obi-Wan lays, back, pulling her with him. He places her carefully on the inside of the bunk, her back against the wall. Her head rests on his shoulder and her arms adjust to wrap around his torso. Her legs slowly uncurl, stretching out before the top one sags over his legs. 

She stirs, her eyes fluttering open from the movement. Obi-Wan pushes a piece of her hair out of her face.

 _"_ Are you feeling better?"

She looks at him and then at their current position. "I... needed to get that out I suppose." 

"It's been a long day for you."

"Is something bothering you as well?" she asks, somehow honing in on the internal argument he's having with himself. He smiles at her sincerity. She would have made a wonderful Jedi.

"Nothing I can't sort out with some meditation."

"As the queen of suppressing things, I can tell you sometimes you just need to say it."

"Or sob it, in your case."

"Look what you've done. You were sweet until that comment. Now I just want to hit you." Her fingertips push against his chin playfully. 

Silence falls between them. Her hand returns to resting on his chest. He's surprised she hasn't said anything about the state they're in. Maybe she too is holding her breath, hoping he won't move.

"The last thing I saw before Arden knocked me out was your face. You were afraid," he finally says after a few long moments.

"I thought she was injecting poison into you." 

"I've never seen you look afraid before. Surprised maybe. Caught off guard. Never afraid though."

"There was nothing you could do."

"That's the worst part of it. I woke up and the first thing I thought of was the look you gave me before I blacked out. I needed to find you immediately."

"Obi-Wan," she says, her chin tilting up. He looks down to gaze upon her in the dim light of the quarters. He knows the words that are on her lips, but he's not quite ready to hear them. Not yet.

"I know," he says softly, swallowing hard. "Get some rest, now."

He resumes those circles on her back. Her gaze remains locked on him for a moment longer before she curls into him, closing her drowsy eyes once more. Obi-Wan is left with that same feeling from the balcony. Where he so desperately wants to do something but he's fearful of the consequences. 

He could easily untangle himself from her. Lift her arm, slip out from under her leg. 

Yet, he doesn't want to. He's in complete control of his moment. His mind is clear and collected and there is nowhere he would rather be than laying here at her side. 

Before he can psych himself out he leans down to test the waters. He presses his lips to her forehead. As he pulls back she's staring at him. He half expects her to actually hit him, but instead, her hand draws up to his face, cupping his cheek. 

So begins the stand-off. She looks at him, her eyes telling him that _it's okay._ She's given hin the torch and it's his move to set the fire. 

But they just look at one another. Both too afraid to say anything, let alone move. 

Exhaustion makes the final decision. Her eyelids soon grow heavy and she slips into an accidental slumber before Obi-Wan can make up his damn mind. He's left alone once again, stuck somewhere between regret and relief, which is not the place he wants to be.

He curls his arm around so his hand rests on the curve of her back and tilts his head so it rests against hers. His eyes begin to droop with drowsiness as his body is engulfed her warmth. He doesn't care that he's indulging in the comfort of her touch and walking a dangerous line of forming an attachment. 

But frankly, Obi-Wan is shit at not forming attachments. He always has been. For so long, he convinced himself it was his duty to push them away. To not allow his hardened exterior break and allow others in.

But what good has that done? What is the line? Is there even one? Anakin used to have this cloak before he hit his growth spurt. It was a hand-me-down from one of the other padawans, many years old. One of the hems in the left sleeve was beginning to fray and Obi-Wan always had to remind him not to pull at the loose threads. He would cut them when they got back to Coruscant. Of course, he never listened to Obi-Wan and pulled at those threads anyways. By the time Anakin had grown out of the cloak, the left arm was a good few centimeters shorter than the right from the unraveled fabric. 

Obi-Wan can't help but feel like that's what he's been doing. He's been pulling at those loose threads instead of cutting them like he knows he should. 

Soon, he will unravel. The damage will be irreversible. 

Yet.

He lays here, this woman tucked against his side. Her gentle breath tickling his chin and the weight of her arm across his chest drawing him in to join her in sleep. 

And it feels like the most natural thing in the world.


	10. Kadavo Certainly Wasn't a Vacation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you read chapter 9 before the afternoon of May 2, there are a few changes to the very end of the chapter. I forgot to include a few details :)

Waking up tangled in limbs is not what Obi-Wan is used to. 

It's not unwelcome, though. 

She's still fast asleep, luckily not also awoken by the vibration of Obi-Wan's com letting him know he has an incoming transmission. He can't exactly answer it here with her lying on his chest-- especially if it's the council-- so he ever so carefully slips out from under her arms and lays her head down softly on the bunk. 

He takes the transmission in the cockpit. The hologram shoots up revealing the blue glowing figure of Master Yoda. The rest of the council is not present, which alarms Obi-Wan. Not only is this an unexpected transmission, but one with just the Grand Master. 

"Master Yoda, is there something wrong?" 

Yoda smiles at him. "Wrong nothing is. Checking in, I am." 

"Oh," Obi-Wan says, running his hand through his messy bed head. "We are nearing Coruscant, actually. Should be coming out of hyperspace in--"

"No. Checking in with _you_ , Obi-Wan." 

"I don't understand what you mean, Master." 

Yoda chuckles, standing from the chair and walking closer to the camera. "Great deliberation and uncertainty I sense in you."

Obi-Wan holds back his horror and embarrassment. He feels like he's a child been caught red-handed even though Yoda likely has little clue of the context of his _deliberation and uncertainty._

"The war has been taking its toll on me, I suppose. As it has everyone" 

"Towards the war, your uncertainty? The order? Or something else?" 

He wants to just be honest with his mentor. Tell him of the doubts he's been having that this war is sending the galaxy in the right direction. He's hinted at it in meetings, but being so new to the council makes him feel like he should maintain a low profile. He wants to tell Yoda of the feelings he's been having and the tough time he's had with deciding how to handle them. 

Who he really wants to talk to is Qui-Gon. He would understand his predicament. He would sympathize with his doubts and would keep his secret from the council until he figured things out. He wouldn't judge Obi-Wan for not following the code as he should be. 

But Qui-Gon is dead. And Yoda is the one standing before him. 

"No, not the order. Mostly just... the war. The Force feels so strange sometimes, it's hard to explain." he says. It's the truth... just not the entire scope of his thoughts.

"Felt this, I also have. Meditate more on this you must."

"You are right, Master Yoda." 

"Something else there is," he says. This time it is not a question.

"Master?" 

"Formed an attachment you have. To your spy." 

Obi-Wan's blood runs cold. 

"We are... friends. Just as I am with my men. The mission always comes first, of course." 

"Tell you I don't of the dangers of attachment." 

"I'm her handler. Establishing trust is part of that." 

Obi-Wan knows he shouldn't be arguing with Yoda, but he also knows he has a point. The council can't have him put in charge of leagues of troopers and expect them to follow him without a foundation of trust. He has to make relationships with the people he is responsible for if the Grand Army of the Republic is ever to succeed in this war. 

"Defending her you are. Revealing your attachment, young Obi-Wan. Natural it is to form a bond with someone who saved your life. Worried I am, that you are too close." 

He breathes deeply, trying to keep himself collected while the frustration tries its hardest to build in his chest. He can't afford to let Yoda see it though. His chest still aches at what he knows he must do. He's run out of time and now he must give in.

"You are probably right, Master. We've worked together a lot these past few months. I've gotten used to having her around." 

"In order a break is, for you and our spy friend. Reassigned she will be, temporarily." 

"I understand. I hope i have not let the council down." 

"To you, I come as a friend, Obi-Wan. Know of this, the council does not. Set things right, you will."

The transmission cuts out and the figure of Yoda disappears. _Reassigned._ They're sending her away. 

At least Master Yoda said it was only temporary. And the council doesn't know. 

He still wants to scream. Bang his fist against something hard. He thought he had more time to figure this out for himself. 

Obi-Wan looks down at his hands, drawn into tight fists with white knuckles. Shame courses through him. He _is_ attached. He's angry at the idea of her getting reassigned and he's letting it get to him. Enough to actually have _argued with Master Yoda_. He slowly releases his fists. It's best that she reports to another handler for awhile. Maybe indefinitely if this is how he's going to act. He must get back on the right path. As much as it might hurt to let her go it will hurt more if he wakes up to find himself fallen from the life he has devoted so much to. He is a Jedi. A protector. A general for the time being. 

He stares at the ring around his finger. He goes to slip it off, but suddenly he loses the will, dropping his hands to his side. The mission ends when he steps onto Coruscant. 

* * *

She was reassigned to an agent named Matese. Obi-Wan did an extensive background on him when he found this out. From the records they had, he seems like a good agent. 

She will be a valuable asset to the team. They will appreciate her ingenuity and it won't take long for her to make friends. 

He can't say he doesn't miss her though. 

One of the first things Cody asked him when he returned was where she was. It felt like he got punched in the gut. News of her reassignment spread through the 212th in just a few hours. He heard the whispering of theories to the reason for her departure in the mess hall and wistful sentiments of things she seemed to have planned with the men that were now scrapped until her return. Anakin even noticed the shift when he and Rex joined hin on a mission. 

"The men seem... quiet," Anakin said, looking around at the orderly mess hall. He, Obi-Wan, Rex, Ahsoka, and Cody all sat together at a table in order to go through a few strategies over dinner. 

Ahsoka nudged him with her elbow, shooting him a look. 

"We needed a spy today to do some recon," Obi-Wan says with a blank expression. 

"Okay, and you sent Espy, right? Did something happen?"

This time Cody shoots Anakin a look. Anakin groans in frustration. 

"Okay, would someone like to tell me what I'm obviously missing here?" 

"Espy was reassigned," Ahsoka says through her teeth. 

"What?" Anakin's eyes widen as he looks at Obi-Wan. "Why didn't you say anything? How does everyone else know?" 

"It's just a reassignment. Happens all the time." Obi-Wan says. "I do believe if we flank from these coordinates we can get behind their heavy cannons and find their weak spot." 

They finish the strategy session and Obi-Wan departs hoping to escape his old padawan before he inevitably tries to get him to talk about her. 

It doesn't happen that day, but it does while headed to a mission on Kiros to check in on a distress call. 

"Why do I get the feeling Espy's reassignment wasn't routine?" Anakin asks when they are alone on the ship. 

"I don't know. Why _do_ you have that feeling." 

"Yoda pushed it though. That seemed abnormal." 

Obi-Wan stops cleaning the grip of his lightsaber and looks at Anakin, whos standing in the doorway with his arms crossed. "You looked at the transfer paperwork?" 

"Well since _apparently_ no one tells me anything around here, I did my own digging." 

"Sticking your nose in people's business can get you in trouble, my young friend." 

"That sounds like a veiled threat, old man." 

Obi-Wan rolls his eyes and turns his concentration back to his hilt. "Master Yoda has his reasons for everything. Sometimes he holds wisdom beyond our understanding." 

"Right. But you don't agree with him, do you?" 

He puts down his lightsaber. The boy isn't going to let this one go. 

"What are you trying to accomplish, Anakin?" 

"Obi-Wan," Anakin crosses the room and sits down in front of him. "Come on. You left for that mission on Canto Bight with her and returned without her acting like you haven't had a cup of tea in weeks." 

"The tea selection has been pretty sparse as of--"

"That's not the point. You can say you miss her, you know. We all do." 

Obi-Wan sighs. He doesn't often acknowledge how much his young padawan has grown, but moments like this remind him that he's not a little boy anymore. 

"I do miss her. She's a good friend and a good morale booster when the days are grim. That doesn't make Master Yoda wrong, though." 

Anakin shrugs. "You can think someone is right and still disagree with them." 

"Well that hardly makes sense, but I know _you_ believe that based on how often you argue with me." 

"I don't-- Nevermind that. Point is, it obviously bothers you that she's gone. Maybe that's... something to think about." 

Anakin gets up, patting Obi-Wan on the shoulder before leaving the cockpit. They're landing soon. Obi-Wan sighs, clipping his saber at his belt. Sometimes he can hear the voice of Qui-Gon through Anakin. It's beyond him how he managed to train such a rebel of a padawan, but the boy has his moments of clarity and wisdom. 

He _does_ miss her. And he does think things would be better if she were here, not only for him but for all the troops. 

There's nothing he can do now, though.

* * *

The mission went wrong. It went very wrong. What began as a plea for help from a colony of Togrutas turned into an undercover infiltration of a Zygerrian slave auction. He can still feel the shadow of the whip digging into his ribs and slicing open his shirt when he thinks about it too much. Laying in the slave quarters on Kadavo he hugs his abdomen tightly, curling his knees into his chest. The entire situation has been such a blur. At first, he was worried about Anakin and Ahsoka. Sending Anakin into any situation that deals with slavery is just poor taste in general. He couldn't believe the council was allowing it. Anakin assured him he would be fine and he'd rather be able to do something about it than send someone else in but Obi-Wan still saw that anger in his eye. 

Then he worried about Anakin too much and forgot to worry about his own identity being discovered. That's how he ended up on his knees before his padawan, a stadium full of slavers calling for his torture, and the whip in Anakin's hands. 

That's how he found himself here with Captian Rex. Slaves in a world where it's supposed to be illegal. 

The slavers were hard on him too. They knew of his identity and took advantage of it. The number of times he's been spit on and called _Jedi_ sc _um_ is up there with the number of times the whip has dug into his back and chest. He can't even look at Rex anymore, both afraid of causing him to be subjected to further torture and too ashamed to look him in the eye. When the days are feeling especially long and the devilish combination of decoration, sleep deprivation, and blood loss has him spiraling, he feels like a child again. A young padawan afraid of rejection. 

Suddenly he knows what they mean when they talked about breaking the slaves. He feels absolutely shattered.

But between the bitter sting of the open wounds on his back and the ache in his chest from the unclean air, Obi-Wan thinks of her. When his vision is blurred and dark spots dance in front of his eyes he pretends the tightness around his chest is not him suffocating on his own breath, but her warm embrace holding him as he drifts to sleep. He tries to imagine the numbness in his fingers and toes after he's been stabbed with an electric prod is just the residual feeling of her fingers running against his skin sending goosebumps over his flesh.

It's cheesy and wishful thinking, but it helps. He recounts their last words to one another. 

_"It's for the best,"_ She said. Voice tight. Chin held high in a show of false confidence. And when he asked her if she truly believed that she told him _"I don't. And neither do you. I take it Master Yoda does, though."_

He still doesn't know how much she heard. Not that it would make a difference. 

" _I'm afraid,"_ he admitted to her. 

_"Of what?"_

_"Must I say it? I know you know."_

Oh, the way her eyes bore into him when she said "I _want to hear it. I... need to hear it."_

"I'm afraid of losing you," Obi-Wan whispers aloud to no one but the ash floating through the air. He's surprised he managed to muster those words. Her trust in him was even more surprising. 

_"You're far too stubborn to ever turn on the dark side."_ she had said.

Stars he hopes she's right. Right now he just feels cold and empty. His connection to the Force is weak. He hasn't felt this alone in a long time. 

He places his palm to his cheek. In his mind, it's her hand holding him. Rubbing her thumb over his cheekbone. 

A part of him feels silly. Recounting the forlorn moments of their ultimate separation as a fantasy to distract himself from his wretched place. He should be meditating. Finding his center. Not letting the memory of her voice penetrate his mind. 

Yet, as he sits so badly broken he can't help but allow himself this one comfort. He can meditate tomorrow. Find his center when his head stops spinning and his belly has something other than bile and a few bites of ration bars in it.

"General Kenobi?" he hears the soft voice of Rex standing outside his bunk. Obi-Wan rolls over to look at him. Rex has been luckier than him. He's dirty and exhausted but not nearly as badly beaten. He's grateful for this. 

"Rex, I pray you call me Obi-Wan. Or just Kenobi at the very least."

Rex grimaces, obviously not entirely comfortable-- the respectful soldier he is-- but he complies. " _Kenobi_ , sir, it's our rotation soon." 

They'll have to work on the sir, but it's a step. 

"I know. I'm coming." 

Rex passes up a small canteen. "I found some water. I had some already. The rest is for you." 

Obi-Wan looks at Rex like he just handed him a newborn child. He thanks him, drinking a greedy gulp of the canteen. He usually would try to savor it, but he's becoming weak from how little water he's had. He must push through if he's to last until the Republic is able to find and free them. 

"Where did you find this?" 

Rex shifts uncomfortably. "Please don't ask me that, sir." 

Obi-Wan swallows dryly, sitting up in the bunk. Now he's curious, but he can see the discomfort in the clone's eyes. He doesn't ask. 

"To our posts, then I suppose." 

They return to their duty. Shoveling for hours on end with no breaks for food. He collapses twice to weakness, which only earns him a whipping or a shock to the collar around his neck. As if that was going to make things better. 

"Rex?" Obi-Wan says in the midst of their shift when the slaver is preoccupied elsewhere. 

"Yes, Gen-- Obi-Wan?" 

"Do you ever wish you weren't fighting the war?" 

Rex looks surprised by the question. "Sir, I was bred to be a soldier. I'm only here because of the war." 

"Yes, I know. I'm grateful to have gotten to know you and your brothers. I just..." 

"If you're asking if I've ever thought about it... then yes. Honestly, I'm not sure who I'd be. My entire life has been as a solider." 

"Maybe you will get to find that out. After the war." 

Rex shoves his shovel into the thick dirt and rocks. "If I may be frank, I fear what will happen to us clones after the war more than I do during." 

"I imagine your mission objective would switch to peace. Something we all could use. I don't know what the council has plans for, but I will advocate for your best interest. I promise you that." 

Rex smiles at him. "Thank you, sir. It really is an honor to be able to fight alongside the Jedi." 

"I'm sure we keep you plenty entertained at times, too." 

"More than you know." 

The slaver soon returns and they must cease their discussions. Another day without an extraction, but after getting to speak to Rex frankly he feels a little bit more himself. Enough that he does allow himself to meditate when he gets to rest for the night. 

He still thinks about her as he drifts off to sleep, though. This time she's sitting in the co-pilot seat, her feet resting on the dash and her head tilted back in laughter. He can practically hear the lovely noise and he hopes it will choose to occupy his dreams. 

* * *

And when they are finally rescued, Obi-Wan's mental spiral is on the upward trend, but the same cannot be said for his physical condition. He limps onto the ship behind Anakin, Ahsoka, and Rex, barely registering anything around him. His mind tells him to stay close and follow them and his legs comply. 

The adrenaline wears off and the Force he's been using to will himself to continue standing seem to give out all at once, and he collapses in the middle of the hanger, much to the horror of Anakin who is the first besides Rex to lay eyes upon the mess of his mangled body.

He wakes up in the med bay laying on his stomach. His head is pounding and his body is stiff but when he reaches back to examine the extent of his injuries he feels only the fresh scar tissue that has formed over his injuries. 

"Obi-Wan."

Obi-Wan looks to the side to see Anakin sitting in a chair next to his bed. He looks exhausted. Like he's been sleeping there. 

"What... how long?" 

"They dunked you for about twenty hours. You were already unconscious so you couldn't fight them," he says, the corner of his mouth twitching into a smug smile. 

"I'm sure the med staff will request me to be brought in pre-knocked out for the foreseeable future, then." 

"Likely. How do you feel?" His eyes flicker to Obi-Wan's bare back. He suddenly wishes he had a little more covering him than the thin med pants and a blanket. He's bound to get more visitors as soon as Ahsoka finds out he's awake... 

"Like hell." 

"You look that way too." 

"Thanks.

"Rex said they whi--"

"Please Anakin," Obi-Wan winces once he realizes the path he's going down. "I'll relive those horrors later. 

"All due respect, master, but it sounded like you were already reliving them in your sleep.," he says with a sad look on his face. "You woke up screaming a few times." 

Obi-Wan doesn't even remember dreaming, let alone waking up other times than before. Maybe that is for the best. 

"Well, Kadavo certainly wasn't a vacation."

"You..." Anakin trails off for a moment like he's trying to decide if he should say whatever is on his mind. 

"Out with it." 

"You kept... calling out for her." 

He doesn't have to say her name for him to know who he's referring to. Embarrassment licks at his cheeks. 

"Who heard?" 

"Just me. Maybe some of the med staff, but I was the only one close to you." 

This is good news. 

"I, uh. I thought of happy moments when things were--"

"You don't have to explain yourself, Master. I understand." 

He smiles at his padawan with appreciation.

"Thank you, my young friend. Though I must ask a favor of you." 

"What is it?" 

"I can sense Ahsoka coming and I would truly appreciate if you could throw an extra blanket over my back. I... don't want her to have to see it." 

He disappears from view. A few moments later Obi-Wan feels a blanket being placed over him carefully. The fabric feels scratchy against the sensitive skin of his injuries, but he at least feels more concealed. As if on cue, the door to the med bay opens and in bounds Ahsoka followed by Rex and Plo Koon. 

He talks with them for a bit, feeling better just having them around. After they leave, Anakin still remains for a moment, lingering with a datapad in his hand. 

"What is it, Anakin?" 

He gets up from the chair he's been sitting in and hands Obi-Wan the datapad. 

"I checked in on her. Thought you might like to know." 

The datapad is a case file. Much of the file is redacted-- typical of Republic Intelligence-- but what the file does show is that she returned back to Coruscant safely from her mission and is now awaiting new orders. Anakin then pulls a transmitter out of his pocket and lays it on the bed next to Obi-Wan's hand. He looks up at the boy. 

"It's long-range. And protected. You can call her... if you want, of course." 

Obi-Wan is not often rendered speechless, but Anakin seems to have figured out how to. 

"T-thank you." is all he's really able to stammer out. Anakin seems amused by this but says he will leave him to rest and exits the med bay. Obi-Wan is sure this streak of kindness from his old padawan will soon come to an end as soon as Obi-Wan is recovered and capable of aggravating him with witty quips once again, but for now, he will accept the kindness of the young knight. Maybe Anakin will even take this as a show of good faith to finally tell him about Padmé... 

Obi-Wan stares at the transmitter lying on the bed. Speaking of Padmé he has no doubt in his mind that this is Anakin's lifeline to her when he's on missions. The fact he's allowing Obi-Wan to even know it exists... maybe he's still trying to make up for sending him on a fake marriage mission. That would explain a lot. 

Whatever the motive, it's a nice gesture. 

Obi-Wan picks up the transmitter and turns it on. He knows her code by heart and his fingers hover above the keypad. 

But he doesn't press them. 

Something within him tells him it's not time. Not yet. He had much time to consider the reason for their separation while on Kadavo. The problem is not entirely that he has formed an attachment, but that he is reaching for her in his moments of weakness. He must grow stronger. Contemplate some things about himself and the future before he can reconnect with her. Moping over her absence and allowing himself to miss her the way he has is doing neither him or her any good. 

Obi-Wan turns off the transmitter and datapad and casts them aside. For the time being, at least. 


	11. Blame Anakin, He was Driving

The galaxy is on fire and Obi-Wan feels as though he is made of straw. 

The Outer Rim Sieges have been lengthy. He's tired of it. Anakin is tired of it. The clones are even getting run down by the progression of the war. Is there an end in sight? He hopes so. 

They're between battles. Obi-Wan is nearly falling asleep at the table in the mess hall while scrolling through a datapad. Anakin is throwing rice at him, trying to get it to fall down the front of his tunic. Obi-Wan deflects it lazily with the force a few times before getting frustrated and shooting the grain back in his face. 

"That wasn't nice." Anakin huffs, throwing another. 

"You're acting like a child." 

"I'm tired." 

"Then go to bed, Anakin." 

"If I go to bed you'll sit here all night. Someone's got to make you stop at some point." 

Obi-Wan glances up over the datapad. "You know you could _help_ me finish this stuff." 

Anakin stretches his arms over his head. "I'd just slow you down." 

Obi-Wan rolls his eyes at the young knight, looking back down at the transmissions he missed while in battle. 

The door to the mess hall opens and in walks Captain Rex and Commander Cody, both with commanding gates. 

"Sirs," Cody says, glancing around at the empty mess hall before putting a holo chip on the table. "We received a distress message from Escarte."

"Escarte? Who in blazes is in Escarte?" Obi-Wan says, scratching his beard. Cody looks at Obi-Wan a little nervously before the hologram comes to life. 

"General Kenobi," Obi-Wan freezes. It's _her_. She's sitting in the pilot seat of what seems to be a small ship. She seems calm, but there's a bit of uncertainty to her expression. "Pleasure to be working with you again. I have been dispatched to track down Thal K'sar. Unfortunately, our intel was outdated, and my ship is being boarded in the asteroid field outside the Escarte mine. I'm afraid I will likely be captured, so I need you to listen very carefully. I am going to get captured and taken to the brig where they are keeping K'sar. There I will free him before I'm locked up and sneak him out. I will need an extraction team though, as it is unlikely I will be able to get my ship. I know this may sound... risky," she smiles as if she's telling an old inside joke. "but we believe K'sar's testimony is vital to end this war and at this point, I see no other option to get out. Send me a signal if you will not be able to send anyone. Otherwise, I'll assume I shall see you soon." 

The hologram cuts out and there's a moment of silence. 

"That sounds like a Skywalker plan," Rex says. 

"If its a Skywalker plan then it'll work _splendidly_." Anakin shoots back.

"And probably involve blowing something up," Obi-Wan adds. 

"I can _not_ save the day if you guys would prefer." 

"Okay enough, we can roast Anakin later." 

Cody picks up Obi-Wan's datapad and starts looking through it. "I believe we can spare one of the squadrons--"

"No," Obi-Wan stops him. "I'll go. I can extract her. If this prisoner is as important as she says he is, we must be discrete. It will be harder for the Separatists to catch a small ship and it'll be able to move faster. I can escort them back to Coruscant and then return to aid in the battle." 

Obi-Wan watches the gears in Cody's brain turn as he considers this plan. "What if you don't make it back in time, sir?" 

"There should be two other Jedi generals meeting up with you. Though, I'm sure at this point you and your men have things well under control without us." 

"Well, we always appreciate the blaster shielding, sir. You can count on us, General."

"I shall go at once then. Knowing our friend she is already causing mayhem." Obi-Wan stands and starts heading out toward the hanger to take a ship. Behind him, he hears the soft patter of running footsteps. "Anakin, where do you think you're going." 

He matches his master's gait. "Coming with you." 

"I was not aware it took two Jedi to extract one spy and a prisoner." 

"It doesn't, but when was the last time you slept, Master?" 

Obi-Wan gives him a side-eye. "So you're coming to babysit me?"

"Someone's got to keep your head on straight." 

"Oh, and you think _you_ are right for that duty?" 

"You give me so little credit, Master. I am offended." 

They reach the hanger and Obi-Wan approaches one of the shuttles. He stops outside the ramp, looking at Anakin suspiciously. 

"Tell me why you actually want to come and I'll let you accompany me."

"Master--"

"Anakin." 

He nudges a piece of his long hair out of his face and sighs. "I want to go back to Coruscant. Even if it's just for a day." 

Obi-Wan wonders if when he says Coruscant he means a certain senator from Naboo.

"That's all you had to say. See how great _honesty_ is?" 

* * *

Obi-Wan spent the entire journey to Escarte engulfed in the giddiness of getting to see her again. He was certainly not expecting their reunion to occur yet, but he's been long prepared for it. He wonders if things will be awkward. To spend over a year apart after the sudden goodbye they had may bring up some strange feelings. Or will they fall back into things like old times? He can hope for the latter. 

Maybe she's changed. Changed her mind about him. Much can happen over time. People can change. Obi-Wan certainly has. He wonders how working with Republic Intelligence has changed her. Her hair looked longer in the hologram. She looked tired, too. 

Soon enough he will find out. 

They come out of hyperspace to the near-barren space near Escarte. Anakin shakes his head at the desolate area. 

"What are they doing sending someone all the way out here? It's practically wild space." 

"K'sar is a skilled artisan for the Commerce Guild. Their intelligence says he was the one to design a mechno-chair that could be traced back to some finances of this war. He's supposed to be put to death, which is why she was looking for him." 

"And they sent a spy to extract him?" 

"I believe her mission was just to confirm his status there. But she mentioned their intelligence was old and it caused her to be captured." Obi-Wan rolls his eyes. How could they be so reckless to send someone alone with bad intel on such an important mission? 

"That seems sloppy for RI."

"Indeed. It will certainly be something to look into. Is that the mine?" Obi-Wan points to a structure atop one of the asteroids. Just as he points there is a massive explosion from the far side of the mine and alarms begin to go off. 

"I think we're in the right place. Hold on!" Anakin increases the speed and they shoot forward toward the mine while dodging asteroids. Obi-Wan holds on tight.

"I see she did employ a Skywalker plan." 

"Oh hush." 

The ship ducks under the bottom of the asteroid and loops around. Obi-Wan reaches out with the Force. He feels her Force signature humming presently. She's strong and impressively in tune with it. 

"Coming up to the hanger." 

Obi-Wan stands and shrugs off his cloak. He grabs his saber and heads to the ramp of the ship. As it begins to drop he gets a full view of the battle. Half of the hanger is engulfed in flames. Destroyer droids are shooting toward the corner. He follows their line of fire to her, holding two blasters and shooting at them. She's uncovered though-- K'sar seems to be cowering in the corner offering no help-- and a blaster shot hits her in the shoulder. She yelps in pain, not getting any time to recover before another explosion rocks the hanger. She goes flying backward, as do the droids. 

"Blast it." Obi-Wan curses, using the Force to try and soften her momentum but she still slams into the wall at a concerning speed. He ignites his saber and jumps down onto the platform to block the blaster shots headed her way. He runs to her side just as she slumps over. His heart is in his throat as he puts a hand on her shoulder. Her eyes flutter open slowly as she gazes up at him, unsurprised by his presence. 

"You're late." 

"Blame Anakin, he was driving." 

Speaking of Anakin, Obi-Wan sees him also jump off the ship to do some damage to a few droids. He must have given controls to R2. 

He helps her up and she immediately goes to the Bith watching curiously from the corner. She grabs his arm and starts guiding him toward the ship. She always has the mission at the forefront. He can tell she's in pain by how she's favoring one side, but she's getting along well enough. 

Obi-Wan covers her while they board and runs to the cockpit to prepare to take control. Once Anakin is on the ramp he closes it up and pulls away from the hanger. 

Not the cleanest extraction ever, but it happened. Obi-Wan's adrenaline catches up with him finally. 

Anakin enters the cockpit, slumping down in his chair. 

"That was easy." He says. "Artoo, program the navicomputer for Coruscant." 

Obi-Wan stands. "She's injured. I'll go check on her." 

"And Thal K'sar?" Anakin adds, with a small smirk. 

"Yes, and K'sar. I believed that was implied," he says, pushing down the blush that has reached his cheeks. 

They're sitting in the hull. She's slumped down against the wall looking like she might pass out at any moment. 

"You're injured." K'sar says to her, pointing down to the very obvious blood stains spreading through the front of her shirt. 

"And you look like hell," Obi-Wan says. Both she and the Bith look up at him. 

"Just what a girl likes to hear." 

Her voice is strong. It relieves him. She likely just looks worse than it actually is. Or her pain tolerance is incredible. 

"Come, let's stitch you up." She stands shakily and follows him into the small room with medical supplies. Once the door closes he looks at her with a disapproving gaze. "You can't help but get yourself into trouble, can you?" 

She sits down on the cot. He kneels in front of her so they're at the same eye level. "This was unplanned trouble. I _thought_ I was being cautious." 

He reaches back and finds a few bacta patches. If a blaster shot or two is all that is ailing her this should be sufficient, especially from the distance they were shot.

"At least you weren't _trying_ to give me a heart attack then. I uh... believe you will have to remove your shirt so I can clean the wounds." 

She doesn't hesitate to begin working at getting her tunic off. He has to help her a little bit, which only brings a greater blush to his cheeks. Yes, this is entirely for medical reasons and it is necessary that he can see what he's doing but he can't help but feel a little flustered. He makes the mental note to ensure his walls are up and tight so Anakin doesn't feel him projecting. That is not a conversation he needs to have with him. 

Her shirt is off and now he can see the extent of her injuries. It definitely looked worse than it is. She has a large burn mark on her shoulder and a few scrapes up her abdomen, but nothing plenty of bacta can't fix. 

He tries to look anywhere but her exposed skin as soon as he gets a sense of what he needs to do. 

"You know, I expected our grand reunion to have significantly less blaster fire," she says, making him smile. He looks back up at her.

"Really? I'm not surprised at all, though I'm disappointed I was correct in my assumptions." 

He looks down at her shoulder to start working on it, but something shiny catches his eye. His gaze flickers to a chain around her neck. At the end of the chain are two familiar wedding bands. 

His parents'. The ones he had left with her. They make everything around him seems to stop. He didn't expect her to wear them all this time. Obi-Wan can't stop himself from reaching out and touching them softly. The metal is surprisingly cool for being tucked against her warm body. He feels the presence of his parents at their touch. It's warm and comforting and feels encouraging.

"I kept them safe." 

"I see that." 

He looks from the rings to her eyes, getting lost in her gaze. 

"They reminded me of you. Made me feel safe." 

"I wish I could have _been there_ to make you feel safe."

"We had our duties. And look, they brought us back."

"It may not be for long." 

"I don't care," she says softly. He opens his mouth to say something-- to break off the road this conversation is going down but he stops, sucking in a shaky breath. No, he's thought about this conversation. It's practically rehearsed in his head, but actually saying it aloud is more daunting than he realized. His nervousness is obvious. He isn't trying to hide it now. 

"I... I thought about you. Every day. Before and after every battle."

"Not during?" she says with a small smile. How wonderful. He's made up her responses to him for so long--taking into account any way she could possibly react-- and she still manages to surprise him with this reply. Her candidness relaxes him.

"Darling, if I were to think of you in the middle of battle I would not be standing here right now."

"You're right, Jedi are shit at multitasking I hear." 

He's smiling like wild now. 

"I resent that view," he replies, but his expression is the opposite of resentment. She's so close now and he flashes back to the balcony when he could feel her breath so close and feel the nervous pounding of her heart under her skin. Or the last night they spent together wrapped in one another's arms, stuck in a moment that came to pass. He was unsure in those times, not quite ready to give in to his impulses, but that was then and this is now. He knows exactly what he wants and she is sitting before him. 

He leans down and presses his lips to hers. She's surprised at first, taking a moment to kiss him back. He pulls away, hovering right above her lips and looking into her eyes. Her pupils are dilated and her cheeks are flushed but she initiates the kiss this time, sending goosebumps down his spine. He just lets himself melt into it. He presses closer, finding himself between her legs and she locks him in by wrapping her legs around his waist. He kisses her deeply, letting his instincts take over. Stars, he could lose himself this way. It's better than he ever imagined. 

He finally parts, just looking at her in amazement. "Oh, I'm in trouble, now." 

"I mean if Anakin can get away with being married to a senator..." 

Obi-Wan stops, giving her a look of disbelief. "How the hell do you know about that?" 

She points to her face. "Spy."

"Right."

"How do you know?" 

"He's not quite as sneaky as I believe he thinks he is." 

"So you saw them together?"

"Padmé may have left her office door open one day." 

"I see. Like I was saying: if Anakin and Padmé are flying below the radar, I'm sure we can keep one kiss a secret." 

He raises an eyebrow. "One kiss?" 

Obi-Wan certainly planned on there being well more than _one_ kiss in their future. 

"This is me giving you an out."

Her words are shocking. Giving him an out? Does she think he acted out of lust? That he didn't think things through and it was just a moment of weakness? 

"What do you mean?" 

"Obi-Wan, I'm not the one that swore to an ancient code. You are a Jedi. I can't make a decision on how you will proceed from here. I can make it easier if you need it to be, though. Give you the chance to think about it..."

He cuts her off by kissing her again. She swallows her words, the tension melting from her shoulders once again. When he pulls away he can still see she has some uncertainty. He holds her close, careful not to go near any of her wounds or put too much pressure on her.

"I've had over a year to think about this." He kisses her right cheek. "Frankly, I'm quite done considering it when I've known what I wanted for..." He kisses her left cheek. "over a year now." 

"Really?" There's a tinge of hope in her voice that makes his head feel like it's spinning. 

"Really.

He brings himself to his feet and grabs the cloth to wash her wounds. He's afraid Anakin will come looking for him if he spends _too_ much time down here. He starts dabbing at her shoulder.

"I can't leave the order while this war wages on, though. I need to see this through." He glances up at her face. She doesn't seem surprised by this.

"So for now, we take things slowly. Keep it a secret and continue our duties." 

"When it ends though, I won't continue with secrets. The council can decide to let me stay or make me go but either way, it will be what fate has intended." He places a bacta patch on her shoulder and presses it in place carefully. "I've lost too many to this war to lose you as well." 

It's her turn to steal a kiss. She leans forward, grabbing his hand with her good one and intertwining her fingers with his. She pulls him toward her and kisses him-- a little more desperation behind this one. He cups the side of her face with his other hand, rubbing his thumb over the high of her cheek. He feels like a giddy teenager. He's stuck in this permanent state of smiling and his heart is pounding twice as fast as it usually does. 

He feels free. Freer than he ever felt pushing down his feelings. He spent so long contemplating whether or not he made the right decision leaving Satine so many years ago. He's harbored his regrets in the back of mind ever since they came to a culmination with her death. 

He knows he is not taking the easiest path, but he does not care anymore. The Force brought her to him for a reason. It's about time he listens.

Obi-Wan convinces himself he really needs to check on Anakin now. He first grabs her a change of clothes and then stops in the fresher to check his own appearance. 

His hair is disheveled, his cheeks are flushed, and his lips appear a little swollen, but he can hide that enough if he combs his mustache down. He tries his best to fix his hair, but that he suspects he can blame on the battle. 

The red cheeks may be more of a tell, but Anakin probably won't notice... 

"Is she okay?" Anakin asks as soon as Obi-Wan enters. 

"Blaster wound to the shoulder. Nasty but it's a flesh wound." 

He sits down in the co-pilot chair. His exhaustion is more prominent now than ever. He thinks he could fall asleep right then and there. 

"You look like crap, too. Do you have a fever?" 

Or maybe Anakin will notice his rosy cheeks. 

"I'm fine. Truly." 

More than fine. He's tired but he feels on top of the galaxy. 

"The council called while you were tending to her. The next battle is being delayed due to supply shortages. We have permission to stay on Coruscant for two rotations while they load a cargo. We will escort it back out to the Outer Rim." 

"I suppose you do get your short break back home," Obi-Wan says, noticing a smile of relief and excitement on Anakin's face. He subdues it when he notices Obi-Wan watching. 

"I'll take what I can get." 

Obi-Wan wonders if Anakin will ever tell him about Padmé. He's likely afraid that Obi-Wan will have to tell the council. 

If he only knew the secret Obi-Wan is hiding. 

He'll tell him eventually. Before he comes clean to the council, for sure. He owes his friend that much at least. 


	12. What Happened on Escarte?

The debrief was fine. They tried to chew her out for the methods that were employed to capture Thal K'sar, but she stood her ground and argued against the faulty information they gave her in the first place. 

One moment did catch Obi-Wan's ear. One of the Republic Intelligence officers was reading through the initial debrief transcript of Thal K'sar, who explained what had happened from his point of view.

"...then the Jedi helped me into the ducts and took out all the battle droids before joining me. We crawled into the other hallway and escaped into the hanger..."

Anakin's look of surprise confirmed that Obi-Wan hadn't heard it wrong either. He glanced over at her. She had a blank look on her face. Didn't even flinch.

 _The Jedi helped me into the ducts and took out all the battle droids._ Interesting. Obi-Wan wondered what "took out" was referring to and how he concluded she was a Jedi. He's absolutely sure she did not introduce herself as such. He _has_ noticed she seems to have a fair grasp of the Force. It is rudimentary, but more than the average Force-sensitive. 

"Did she tell you what happened on Escarte?" Anakin asked while he and Obi-Wan flew from the Senate building to the Jedi Temple for their council meeting. 

"Do you mean the part about K'sar calling her a Jedi? No, she did not go into detail." And she hadn't. On the ship, they just caught up on the highlights of the missions of the last few months. To Anakin's knowledge, they went their separate ways after landing on Coruscant but... he saw it fit to escort her home at the late hour and she insisted he needed sleep immediately and was too tired to return to his quarters. Even in spending the night, they spent the entirety of the time actually sleeping. 

Oh, the sleep he had. It was blissful. He could smell her on his clothes even after he left. 

"You haven't been teaching her a few tricks have you?" 

Obi-Wan looks at Anakin incredulously. "Ah yes, when I wasn't fighting at your side I was commuting back and forth to train a spy in the ways of the Force."

"Master, I'm surprised you're not more worried about this. She's using the Force and making people believe she's a Jedi. It could be dangerous."

"I hardly believe she's trying to impersonate being a Jedi, Anakin. Plus we are not the only Force-users in the galaxy. K'sar made an assumption." 

Anakin eyes Obi-Wan. "Does it not bother you that she's not being trained but seems to be improving her skills? She's stronger than she was a year ago, I can sense it."

Obi-Wan nearly bursts out laughing. "Are you really trying to imply that someone could be training her?"

"You run into a criminal on the streets. She saves your life during an isolated Separatist attack and turns out she's Force-sensitive. You give her a job, she turns her life around as a spy for the Republic. She faces Maul, a former Sith Lord that nearly killed _you,_ and he lets her go. She obtained plans to a secret Separatist weapon while you were unconscious. And now she's apparently skilled enough in the Force to take out a group of battle droids single-handedly? Obi-Wan, I hate to say it, but you can't tell me that it isn't a little bit suspicious." 

"You're generalizing things, Anakin. Maul was weak and injured and nearly killed her. If she were a Sith, as I assume you're trying to imply here, why would she give us a vital piece of intel about their weapon? And why would she be as careless as using her powers? I understand what you're trying to say, and when you spell it out in that way yes, it does look incriminating, but it's purely circumstantial." 

"I don't want to believe it either but--"

"But what evidence do you actually have?" Anakin opens his mouth and then closes it. "This is a dangerous road to go down. One we should not go down again." Obi-Wan knows referencing the absolute nightmare Ahsoka's trial was is a low blow, but Anakin needs to hear it. The knight settles down a little bit. 

"You're probably right. I'm just... on edge."

They exit the shuttle and walk into the front of the Temple.

"Anakin we are in a war. We deal with betrayal and lies every day. You're not wrong to be hyperaware of those around you. You should just remember there must also be solid evidence to back it. I suspect she's been utilizing the Force for years without truly understanding what she's doing. She's quite intuitive and knows enough about the Jedi way from just being around us to figure some things out for herself."

"Like how I used the Force during pod-races." 

"Precisely. I'll talk to her, find out exactly what happened on Escarte." They reach the council room. Anakin knocks softly on the door. "Plus," Obi-Wan scoffs. "I'd like to think we'd be able to clearly sense being in the presence of a Sith." 

The door opens and they walk in to see a hologram Chancellor Palpatine finishing up a conversation with the masters. 

Obi-Wan takes his seat. As he sits, a dark feeling washes over him. It's cold, tingling at the back of his neck. He brushes it off.

All this talk of Sith lords has him at wit's end. He hates that Anakin's theory actually made a lot of sense even though he knows it's not the truth. She shows control, but nearly enough control to be an apprentice. Her disposition is too selfless. Plus, she's provided enough intel to the Republic over the course of this war to prove her loyalty tenfold. If she's a Sith, she's extremely bad at her job. 

It still worries him, though. If Anakin is putting these things together what is preventing others from using the rather questionable ways in which things have gone down against her? She could end up like Ahsoka, and he wouldn't be able to stand that. Not after how hard she's worked to get herself off the streets. He didn't do nearly enough for Ahsoka. He should have pushed against the council harder. He won't make that mistake again if it comes to it.

Obi-Wan felt strange throughout the meeting. At first, it felt like some sort of disturbance in the Force. The hairs on the back of his neck were standing on end and he felt colder than he usually does. Considering a room full of Jedi weren't reacting to it, he figured it must just be him. He probably just needs sleep. 

They're sending him and Anakin back out into battle in the morning. He thought they might get at least another day. He was hoping to get to see her... maybe indulge in the opportunity to sleepover once again. However, Anakin likes to grab breakfast before early departures, and there's no doubt he would get away with not being in his quarters. The boy doesn't always knock either. He'll com her later. Try to see her after breakfast. 

Obi-Wan looks at the room of Jedi before him. Many of them are holograms, reporting in from their respective places of battle. It feels different sitting there. Especially with his mind fixated on her. He almost feels guilty for blatantly defying the code. Almost. 

He discussed this with her in the morning-- how ironic to be talking about the stringent Jedi codes Obi-Wan held in the highest regards for so long while laying in the arms of his secret girlfriend. He was telling her of the classic line of how fear leads down the road to the dark side. 

_"Did that belief change?"_ she asked in response.

_"Well, I'm laying here with you, so you could say that. It's quite backward actually. I spent a good part of my youth fearing what my life would be like if I failed to become a Jedi. Hell, I nearly wasn't if it weren't for Qui Gon taking me as his padawan at the last minute. So I pushed away anything I thought would get in my way of being a Jedi. And yet-- how is the fear of my own future different than the fear losing those I love? Fear is fear in the end."_

Obi-Wan honestly had not expected the words he said to leave his mouth. His own opinion was sort of a surprise to him. His own voice still echos in his head as he continues to process. It's incredible to him how the words were there he just couldn't see them whilst bottled up in his head. Maybe her calming presence played a party as well.

_"It's a natural thing."_

_"And I know how to compartmentalize it on a mission or in battle. The very concept of having to take on a padawan and watch them grow and work alongside you is the very definition of forming a bond and having to learn to work through the personal feelings that may arise in precarious situations. We are literally trained to be selfless and put the common good ahead of our own personal biases, yet making unsanctioned connections with those other than your padawans and masters are forbidden."_

She seemed surprised by his words. Surprised, but with a hint of a knowing smile. Like she could just imagine him lying sleepless in his bunk, as he did often in the year they were apart, just trying to sift through these things on his own."You've _thought about this a lot, haven't you?"_

_"This war has opened my eyes in many ways. I have found there can be a balance in places that gray areas were not thought to be possible. I intend on finding that balance."_

Balance. The bloody word has been tossed around so much in his lifetime. Mostly in reference to Anakin. _The Chosen One_. Sometimes he feels it's lost its meaning. How is he supposed to bring balance to the Force? Did Obi-Wan prepare him enough? 

Would things be different if Qui-Gon had gotten to train him like he wanted to? 

Obi-Wan tries not to think about these things. Especially imagining the what if's surrounding Qui-Gon. If he succumbs to the what-if's of life, he will forever be dwelling on the past to predict a nonexistent future. That leaves little room for the present. 

The balance that Anakin is prophesied to bring is now up to him. He'll always be Obi-Wan's padawan and brother in his head, but he's a knight now. Soon to be a master, Obi-Wan hopes. Anakin certainly deserves it after all he's done in the war. Sure the boy is impulsive and reckless, but somehow _it works_. 

The balance that Obi-Wan is looking for is more personal. It will be a testament to his training to figure out the best way to balance how to actively form an attachment-- something Obi-Wan hasn't ever really deliberately done before-- while also remaining true to his Jedi duties. Hopefully when the war ends the Jedi will revert back to peacekeeping and diplomacy. That would be easier to find a middle ground with than being on an active battlefield. 

"...aster Kenobi. Obi-Wan?" Obi-Wan tunes back into the meeting at the sound of Master Windu attempting to get his attention. 

"Yes? Apologies, my mind seems to have decided to run a little." 

Windu seems skeptical but he goes on asking his questions. 

The meeting finally ends. Obi-Wan slips on his cloak, relieved when no one seems to stick around to question him on why he was so zoned out through the meeting. He will definitely have to shape up in that aspect.

He blames this on the lack of sleep as well.

* * *

Obi-Wan goes to sleep as soon as he reaches his quarters after dinner. His body is still angry with him, urging him to take advantage of his final night back on Coruscant. A storm has rolled in over this sector of the planet as well, making his room extra dark and the pitter-patter of rain soothing him into a quick and deep sleep. 

He awakes to knocks at the door. At first, he thinks it's just his imagination, but when he reaches out with the Force he realizes that _she's here_? He quickly slips out of bed, grabbing his cloak as its the closest article of clothing he can throw over his shirtless body and opens the door. When the door opens her fist is raised like she's going to knock again. His eyes run over her. She's soaking wet, the water dripping down her face and creating a trail down the hallway of the temple. 

Then he notices the look in her eye. Fear. Uncertainty. Something is wrong.

"What are you doing here, darling?"

"Obi-Wan," she replies, her voice breaking as she musters his name. He feels his chest ache at the sound and immediately escorts her into his quarters, glancing down the empty hallways. 

"What's wrong?" 

She doesn't answer for a long time. Long enough that Obi-Wan is beyond the point of holding back his concern. She looks so small wrapped up in her oversized cloak, shivering as the rainwater continues to soak her to the bone. 

What is he doing, he should be getting her a cup of tea and some warm clothes. Before he can offer she finally speaks.

"Maul," she says softly. "Maul came to see me." 

Suddenly the strange feeling that Obi-Wan had all day clicks. And suddenly he feels like crumbling to the ground. 

"What?" He asks, but he knows what she said. He looks away from her staring out the window. The last time he saw Maul... well, it was when he murdered Satine. When he held her in his arms as she died by his hand and he watched sadistically. The last time he saw Maul he swore if that damned Zabrak had the gall to raise his saber to Obi-Wan he would make it the last time. And yet he fled the planet of Mandalore. Broken. Satine was his first love. The woman who made him realize that maybe there is more. He didn't choose her back then, and while he doesn't regret his decision he can't deny she was the crack in his foundation that led him to who he is today. Holding her in his arms one last time, watching that vibrant life drain from her eyes was the wake-up call he needed. He looks back at her. Tears are brimming in her eyes but she's waiting for him patiently. "Did he hurt you?" 

"No. He just..." She reaches into her pocket and pulls out a dark blue piece of metal. "I woke up wearing this," Speaking of Satine... she holds out one of the Duchess's headbands that she used to wear. A simple blue one, encrusted in blue jewels. He can remember the occasion in which she wore it too. How lovely it looked with her hair done up in that updo style. He couldn't stop staring at her. "That's her--"

"Yes. It is. It... was." he interrupts her, hoping that speaking will keep him centered. His fingers rub against the smooth Mandalorian alloy.

"I'm so sorry." 

He's holding a piece of Satine in his hands, but her memories don't flash through his mind like traumatic flashbacks in the way they used to. He feels a deep ache in his chest, but he has already grieved the loss of the Duchess to a great extent. She will forever be a special part of his heart and he will always feel her with him, but his mind fleets from Satine to the woman standing before him in a dripping wet cloak. 

Maul visited her. And for whatever reason, she's standing her before him. Alive. Obi-Wan steps forward to close the distance between them, hugging her tightly. 

"No, I am. I should have made sure he was dead over a decade ago." 

"You cut him in half. That's usually sufficient." 

Somehow she always seems to find a way to make him smile. Even when he's struggling to maintain his calm and holding the artifact of his dead love. Even holding her close to him makes him feel better. It makes him feel whole. If she weren't wearing a heavy wet robe he's sure she would bring a lovely warmth to him as well. 

Stars, he has fallen for this woman. Harder than he ever thought possible. He finds it unfortunate that he gets these bursts of emotion when it's nearly too late. Maul could have killed her, or taken her. He promised himself he wouldn't let himself repeat his past transgressions with talking about his feelings. _Love_ sits at the tip of his tongue but against his emotional judgment, he suppresses it. It would be cruel to say it before leaving in the morning.

Obi-Wan settles with matching her lighthearted switch in tone. 

"One would think." He finally pulls away, holding her at an arm's length. "Are you aware that you're soaking wet?"

She looks down at her heavy clothes and then glances at the massive wet spot that has appeared on the front of Obi-Wan's pants and his cloak. "Funny, I hadn't noticed." 

He leans forward and presses a kiss to her forehead. "Allow me to get you some tea, my dear. And a change of clothes." He walks over to his closet and pulls out a tunic and a spare pair of night pants. They'll be big on her but it'll work for the time she's here. He also slips his cloak off and puts on a nightshirt instead. 

"Here," he hands her the clothes. "I'll be right back. You can put these on." 

He slips out of the room and walks down the hallway to the small kitchen area. He takes two mugs from the cabinet and sets the teabags into them while the kettle begins to heat up. Leaning back against the counter Obi-Wan takes a deep breath in and out. He had wished he would get to see her and spend the night with her but... not like this.

If he had any doubt deep in his mind of her not being who she says she is, it's entirely gone now. Seeing that look in her eyes-- the fear and confusion when she first entered and the pure sympathetic sadness when she pulled out Satine's headdress-- was evidence enough. He never doubted she was telling the truth, but this just reinforces things.

He also noticed the way she moved stiffly. How she tensed when he hugged her and his hands pressed into her back. Maul definitely didn't keep his hands off her entirely whether she'll admit it or not. 

Blast it, how could he be so stupid as to ignore his feelings? He _felt_ a strange presence he just chose to ignore it. 

"Master?" a voice cuts through the dark. Obi-Wan looks up to see Anakin walk into the kitchen looking quite confused. 

"What are you doing awake?" Obi-Wan asks, glancing at the late hour on the wall and hearing the pitter-patter of rainwater dripping off the bottom of Anakin's robes. 

"I could ask you the same question." he follows Anakin's gaze down to the two cups waiting for hot water to be poured into them. Busted. 

"Maul attacked her," he says as-a-matter-of-factly, trying not to expose the bitterness in his tone. He turns to pour the boiling water into the cups as Anakin sounds like he's choking. 

"Excuse me? Maul was here on Coruscant?" 

"Apparently so." 

"What did he want?" 

"That's what I'm about to find out," Obi-Wan says, taking a mug in each hand. 

"Is she okay? I can come and--," 

"No," Obi-Wan says firmly. "She's shaken. Could barely speak when she got here. I appreciate your willingness to help, Anakin, but I've got this under control." The boy looks into Obi-Wan's eyes. Much to Obi-Wan's surprise, he only nods instead of pressing the issue further. "I'll tell about it tomorrow at breakfast." 

He leaves his padawan in the dimly lit kitchen. The sound of dripping water echoes down the hall as he returns to his room. 

She tells him about how she answered the door and he forced his way in. How he seemed to just be there to talk but she could sense he had other nefarious motives beneath the surface. How he specifically told her he wasn't going to kill her. 

Goosebumps shot up Obi-Wan's arm when she told him that part. Maul's own words to him when he was on Mandalore echo in his head. He wasn't trying to kill Obi-Wan then, either. He just wanted to watch him suffer. 

Maul's actions are confusing here as well. He didn't try to summon Obi-Wan as he did on Mandalore. If she hadn't told him he paid her a visit, he wouldn't even know it happened. 

He staged her in Satine's headdress, too. He's taunting him. Trying to make him feel powerless. 

She assures Obi-Wan of the opposite. 

"It won't work." 

"I wish it didn't," He looks down at the headdress sitting in his lap, his thumb tracing the raised edges of the stones. "But I've seen Maul kill in cold blood, and I'm afraid that isn't something I can witness again." 

"You mustn't be afraid because of this. That's what he wants and you know it." 

She's right. Obi-Wan walked into Maul's traps not once but three times. All three times have resulted in the death of the people around him. People's close to. He can't let this keep happening. 

"You are right though. I'm not acting like myself."

"You're acting like someone who watched a woman he loved for years get murdered. Like a general who's watched a war go past its expiration date. Obi-Wan. You are rightfully _exhausted_. What you are feeling is justified and you need to let yourself mourn." She slips her hands into his. 

"These... feelings I'm having are not the Jedi way." 

"Must I remind the _Jedi Master_ what he once told me about meditation? I do believe it was something along the lines of _meditation is a time to process the emotions so you can overcome them."_

An involuntary smile appears on his lips. "The council really ought to knight you at this point." 

"I'm serious. I can't have you going back into that battle worrying about me. The 212th needs the full capacity of their General and I need you on top of your game so you can come back to me in one piece." 

And the moment comes again. He looks at her sitting across from him, holding his hands in hers, and reminding him of the duties he has sworn himself to. Duties that prevent him from showing his affections to her outwardly. Duties that she has chosen to respect. 

That pesky L-word pokes at his ribs. 

"You truly are one of the most incredible people I've ever met," he says softly. She mirrors him and leans forward to kiss him lightly. He restrains himself from pulling her into his lap and truly showing his appreciation for her. 

"I do believe I should leave you to your meditating... and before anyone finds me sitting in your bed wearing your robes." 

"It would make for quite the scandal." 

Obi-Wan finally tells her that he is leaving in the morning. She tries and fails at masking her disappointment that she will be remaining on Coruscant. He assures her he will be back. 

She changes back into her wet clothes despite his assurances that she could wear them home. She's stubborn, though. Stubborn enough that she insists he doesn't have to wait in the hallway while she changes and that turning and facing the wall will suffice. 

Obi-Wan would be lying if he didn't take a bit of a peek. 

She hugs him tightly and he kisses the top of her head.

"Be careful... but also kick some ass."

"I will do just that," he replies, brushing his fingers through your hair. She leans back, probably taking a good look at his horrendous bed head. When her stare lasts a few seconds longer than he expects he cocks his head to the side curiously. "What is it?" 

"Nothing... I just have this weird feeling. Like when you left after Canto Bight."

He kisses her forehead softly. "I'll be back. You can't get rid of me that easy." 

She leaves and the room already feels emptier than before. The rain seems to have lightened up outside, only a light shower remaining. 

Obi-Wan picks up his cloak that he lent her, pressing the fabric to his face. 

It smells like rainwater, munition powder, and a faint hint of cinnamon. It's a familiar smell to the last time he loaned her his cloak to use as a blanket. It lingered for days and he was disappointed when it finally disappeared.

Obi-Wan is pretty sure it's become his favorite scent. 


	13. Anakin is Good.

Mustafar grows smaller as Obi-Wan flies away from it.

Silent tears stream down his face. 

The shock has set in and he just feels an eerie numbness spread over him. Like his body can't quite process what just happened. In fact, he thinks his body is having trouble processing anything. Burns are scattered about his body from the flying embers. Or the sear of Anakin's lightsaber when he got a little too close. He knows these are there but he feels no pain.

Obi-Wan winces at the name of his padawan. That was not Anakin Skywalker. That was someone else. 

Anakin is good. A reckless force to be reckoned with, but he's _good._ His heart is in the right place. He cares deeply. Goes out of his way to help others. Anakin is good. Anakin is _good._

Those words repeat over and over in his mind. 

Anakin is good. 

It's so clear it sounds like it's echoing through the ship. 

Anakin is good.

Oh, wait. He's saying it out loud. The mantra is tumbling out like a balloon with too much gas. 

"Anakin is GOOD." he bellows, his breaking hard and shakey. The words bounce off the walls, feeling like a smack in the face. He's a Jedi. A brave knight. A general in the Grand Army of the Republic. The little boy on Tatooine they picked up. Obi-Wan's padawan. 

"Anakin is dead," he whispers, his breath hitching into a high squeal like when he was fourteen. 

His body is shaking. He can hardly hold the controls. 

He needs to go back. He needs to bring his body back. Why in blazes would he leave his brother on that fiery hellhole? He deserves a proper burial. A Jedi burial. Anakin is still a Jedi no matter the shimmering gold of his eyes or the hate that was etched across his features. That was someone else, using the body of his best friend for whatever wicked scheme was followed through.

And he left him there. 

Obi-Wan so desperately wants to go back. He wants to hold the body of his best friend out of the dirt in the same way he did for the others he loved. Qui-Gon Jinn. Satine Kryze.

Anakin Skywalker. 

But he puts the coordinates in the navicomputer. His body has separated from his mind and it's doing what Obi-Wan knows he must. He must get Padmé the help she needs. 

_Padmé._

The holo of Anakin striking down the younglings flashes through his mind as he looks over his shoulder at the unconscious figure of a very pregnant Padmé Amidala. The irony is painful and Obi-Wan tries to think about something else.

Anything else.

Naturally, his mind falls to her. His lovely criminal turned spy. 

He can see her in his head. Her eyes twinkling at him, creased in the corners when she's smiling. Her fingers gingerly tracing the contours of his skin, entangling in his hair, and smoothing the out of place hairs in his beard. Her lips pressing against his. The little gasps she makes when he pulls her closer. 

The way she says _I love you_ by fixing the collar of his tunic or surprising him with a cup of tea. The way her cheeks grow warm and red when he says _I love you_ by going out his way to bring her favorite pastry from a tiny café near her old housing unit, or squeezes her hand. 

He can feel that she is still alive and safe. She's clever. He worried about her for a split second after he resurfaced from the water in Utapau, but her words of comfort washed over him. 

_"I can't have you going back into that battle worrying about me. I need you on top of your game so you can come back to me in one piece."_

He knows she took care of herself. Found a place to hide. 

He can feel it. 

How did things go wrong so fast? How did a scouting mission to Utapau turn into all this? The fall of the Republic? The turning of Anakin Skywalker? The death of the Jedi Order? 

Obi-Wan rifles through the events of the last few rotations. He and Anakin were recalled to Coruscant. Dooku had taken the Chancellor hostage, and Obi-Wan and Anakin had to get him out. Obi-Wan was injured, knocked unconscious. When he awoke he was being carried on the back of his young padawan. 

Now that fond memory of pride his former student is laced with pain. 

They got back to Coruscant. Anakin landed half of the burning ship by the grace of the Force. Palpatine was safe and Anakin went off with the senators. 

Obi-Wan tried to call her, but the transmissions weren't going through. He figured she must be in a locked-down room. Low and behold he found her as her boss was kicking her out for working too hard. He couldn't help but see himself in her frustrated yet exhausted state. He's been shut down many times by those around him telling him to stop being stubborn. What a stubborn pair they make. 

Just thinking about what happened next is the quickest way to bring a blush to his cheeks. He thought about it the entire way to Utapau. Cody seemed quite vexed after having to call out his name for the fourth time when Obi-Wan had descended into day-dream land.

He never saw himself doing things like that. Going into an empty conference room and passing the time with wandering hands and feverish kisses was _never_ at the forefront of the way Obi-Wan expected his life to turn out. It put him in a fantastic mood, though. Especially when Anakin chose not to point out his swollen lips and ruffled hair. 

His mind wanders back to Anakin. That was the last time he saw him. Like, truly saw _him_. 

Then came Utapau. The fall of Grevious and what Obi-Wan thought would be the end of the war. 

And then Commander Cody-- someone Obi-Wan considered to be a close colleague and even a _friend_ \-- ordered his execution. 

Obi-Wan remembers falling. It was an extremely large height and he lay suspended in that air for what felt like a full minute. In that time he just felt as though he were surrounded by darkness. There was a horrible disturbance in the Force. His head was buzzing and it felt as though his heart were breaking, but he had to focus and slow his descent. If the water weren't there he wouldn't have survived. 

He returned to the Temple. Found Yoda. He found out the fate of his apprentice and went through every stage of grief in a matter of seconds. His young friend had turned to the Dark Side. 

Obi-Wan still isn't truly sure what happened. He knows Palpatine was the Sith Lord, and the clones were programmed to kill the Jedi upon an order from Darth Sidious. He kicks himself at not realizing that the particular attention the Chancellor paid to Anakin was more than just a mentorship that grew too close or a plot to spy on the Jedi. 

Selfishly, Obi-Wan prays that the hatred Anakin showed for him on Mustafar was misguided. That lies and manipulations were whispered in his ear by the Sith and weren't the reflection of his own feelings. Obi-Wan was well aware that Anakin felt the Code was restrictive and his master could be strict. But he also gave him a lot of leeway with his wild antics and tried his best to keep the council off his back. Hell, he practically raised the boy and Obi-Wan knows that Anakin knows this. He knows that while they fought at times there was still deep respect between them. 

Which is why his betrayal hurt that much more. Whether it was Palpatine in his ear or Anakin actually hating Obi-Wan, Obi-Wan still can't help but blame himself. His only student turned to the dark side. Qui-Gon gave him one job-- train Anakin to be the great Jedi he is meant to be. And he failed. 

He failed. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this one is short, but I feel like this moment needed its own chapter for the obvious reasons. It's so difficult to even conceive what was going through Obi-Wan's head.   
> I started reading the Jedi Apprentice series, which is the junior novel series about Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon's adventures and holy cow it just makes everything about the prequels hurt so much more despite not technically being canon.


	14. This is Goodbye

The medical droid looks up at Obi-Wan and shakes its head. The steady blaring of Padmé's heart monitor echoes through the room. Obi-Wan looks down at the newborn baby he has cradled in his hands. A girl Padmé named Leia. The other medical droid is tending to the boy. She named him Luke. 

Obi-Wan wonders of Padmé and Anakin ever sat down and talked about names. What to name a girl and what to name if it were a boy. Apparently they didn't have to choose. 

But it doesn't matter anymore. They both are gone. 

Leia is screaming. Her eyes are squeezed shut and her face is red. He can feel Luke becoming unsettled by his sister's discomfort as well. Obi-Wan sends waves of reassurance and comfort through the force. To his surprise, the infant calms down, settling into a light sleep. 

Blazes, they're force-sensitive. 

Not surprising considering their father, but that makes things much more difficult. They can't let Sidious find the children. 

Bail Organa decides to take Leia. Obi-Wan will take Luke to Tatooine to live with his family. It's the perfect hiding space: Sidious won't ever suspect Anakin's son to be hidden on the very planet he grew up on. Luke Skywalker will be hidden in plain sight. 

Hopefully, they won't ever be found, though. They will take all the proper precautions to make it seem like Padmé _and_ the twins died. 

"Bail," Obi-Wan says as they begin to prepare to leave. Bail will go back to his home on Alderaan and Obi-Wan will travel to Tatooine to drop Luke off with his uncle. "There's something I must do. I need to return to Coruscant." 

* * *

Obi-Wan remembers the first time he came to her old housing unit. It's still just as dark and dreary, though now it seems abandoned. He hopes he's right about her being here. He's had to close himself off from the Force in order to come back here. It's too dangerous if he were to be sensed. 

He walks up the stairs and stands in front of her door, taking a deep restorative breath. 

Then he opens the door. 

"Darling?" he says carefully, taking a step into the apartment. He hears movement around the corner and then her head peeks out. He feels as though his heart might burst with relief. "Darling," he says again as his voice breaks and the door shuts behind him. 

Her blasters drop to the floor with a hard _clank_ and tears immediately form in her eyes. "Obi." 

They run to each other, meeting in the middle with a tight embrace. Feeling her in his arms is the greatest relief he's ever experienced. He squeezes her tightly like she might disappear if he isn't careful. Though Obi-Wan has cried more in the last few days than he has in his lifetime he bursts into sobs. These are not the silent tears that stoically roll down his cheeks though. These are violent sobs that cause him to wail into the fabric of her tunic and feel like he needs to roll into a ball. They drop to their knees and he practically pulls her into his lap just to hold her closer.

"He's gone." 

"Who?" 

"Anakin. He's gone. I-I-"

"Shhh, it's okay, it's okay. I'm here." she soothes him

"The clones. They--they murdered,"

"I know. I know."

Everything is hitting all at once. The betrayal, the feeling of failure. The loss. It bombards him in waves of anguish. Suddenly those burns that covered his body are on fire again. The heat travels up his cheeks and makes his face feel hot and his head go lightheaded. For a moment he feels like he's back on Mustafar with the hot dry air hitting his cheeks and the fabric of his tunic melting into his skin. 

But he feels her fingers brushing through his dusty hair and he remembers that he's not there he's on Coruscant. He's safe. She's safe. 

"They think I'm dead," he says after a long while of crying. 

"They tried to... Cody..."

"Yes," she interrupts him. He can feel her tense up. She was so close to Cody. To all the men. "I don't understand." 

"I do not fully understand it either."

"How did this even happen?" 

"Sidious," he says softly. "Palpatine is a Sith. I don't know how we could have missed it..." 

"It's not your fault. Palpatine had us all fooled. He has the galaxy fooled now. But you can't blame yourself." 

"It's my job to know, though. To be able to sense that there's a Sith Lord in the fucking room." 

"Did Yoda know? Windu?" 

Hearing Windu's name brings another pain to his heart. He didn't make it either. "No."

"I know you're right. It doesn't feel that way right now, though." 

"It's a fresh wound, Obi. It will take time. It'll be at the forefront of your mind for a long time. But eventually, you'll realize you haven't thought about it in a few hours. And then it doesn't come to mind for a few days. And then you go for a few weeks. A couple of months. Maybe even a year in due time, but that's just it. You almost died. You watched some of your closest friends die. The entire life you know is changing. This is not something you're going to get over right away."

Her words are so thought out he can only guess it's the mantra she has been working her way through for years. She's lost everything just as he has. She knows exactly what he's going through and even in the darkest of hours she can't help but make him feel a little lighter. She gives him hope where he never, ever, could have found it on his own. This is why he loves her. 

He looks up at her as the realization washes over him. He's known of his feelings for weeks, yet he's held his tongue and for what? 

Obi-Wan looks into her eyes, brings both his hands up to cup her face in his, and kisses her. It's not a sweet, romantic kiss, or an intimate fiery one. It's just desperate like there's a chance it could be the last. He won't let it be the last, though. 

"I love you," he says, barely louder than a whisper. "I love you so much." 

When she looks at him she smiles and he feels his heart swell at the sight. "Stars, I love you too Obi-Wan." 

For a moment the world around them is silent. There are no Sith or Jedi; no Republic or Empire. There's just Obi-Wan and the person he loves, sitting on the floor of a ratty housing unit deep under the surface of Coruscant. The only light is artificial and both of them are dirty and exhausted, but the moment still has a glow around it. He will cling to the warmth that is spread through him forever. 

Just as fast as it happens, it fades away with the sound of clone trooper boots walking down the streets. Their time is up.

"We need to go. Now. There's a ship waiting for us." Obi-Wan says, pulling himself off the ground and standing up. He helps her up and she immediately gets to work. She throws on her cloak and shoves a few blasters on her belt. Obi-Wan even takes one, not wanting to pull out his lightsaber and reveal himself as a Jedi in this new galaxy where Jedi are to be killed on sight.

Oh, how the galaxy changes.

She throws a bag with a few rations and a canteen onto her back and nods to him that she's ready. They sneak down the stairs to the speeder Obi-Wan used to get there. The troopers aren't on the street yet, but they're nearby. They climb on the speeder and take off to a ship waiting on a nearby landing dock. 

By the grace of the force, they aren't seen. She walks into the ship, but Obi-Wan stops and gazes onto the horizon. A cloud of smoke still rises from the Jedi Temple in a twisted cloud that curls in the upper atmosphere. He looks up the city that has been his home since his childhood. He grew up wandering these streets. Learning the shortcuts and best ways to get around. Hell, he even speaks with a distinct Coruscanti accent. 

His life here is over now. The Temple continues to burn and inside Obi-Wan's chest, he feels his own heart burning with it. 

"Obi?" She stands at the top of the ramp, worry laced in her features. He looks up at her and admires her beauty before looking back at the sunset forming in the distance. Swirls of pink and orange and purple fade into the bright blue sky. It's offensive how beautiful it can look when there is nothing but darkness that remains on this cityscape. 

"Do you know what Coruscant means?" he asks her without looking back up at her. 

"No, I don't." 

"It means sparkling. Glittering. Something vibrantly beautiful." 

She walks halfway down the ramp and looks out at the picturesque scene. "It is beautiful. On the surface at least." 

And she's right. Coruscant was never perfect. The underworld was dreary and not enough attention was given to the poverty and suffering that happened down there. At some point, darkness had to reach the surface. He never believed it would emit from the Jedi Temple, though. 

"Obi-Wan, are you okay?" she asks. He lets out a deep breath. 

"Yes. I'm just saying goodbye." 

He turns, meeting her halfway up the ramp to snake his arm over her shoulders, and they enter the ship together.

The ship takes off and Coruscant shrinks beneath him. He's flown into this planet to know what it looks like as nighttime settles over this hemisphere. The lights glow a fabulous yellow, juxtaposing the darkness around it. From the upper atmosphere, it looks like the entire planet is sparking, emulating its namesake. 

Obi-Wan doesn't look back though. He doesn't need to. 

* * *

She decides to go with him to Tatooine. Obi-Wan figures this is better than his original plan. She can just drop him off and take the ship to wherever she wants to go. He can't leave Tatooine anyways, and not having a ship will allow him to not give in to any temptations. 

Of course, she does not know of his plan yet. As far as she knows he's leaving the sand planet with her. 

He's not quite sure how to bring it up. He knows for a fact she will try to convince him otherwise, but his mind is made up. He must protect Luke, and in doing so he must let her go. She would never want to live on Tatooine. Not considering her past with the Hutts. 

He nearly made it entirely through their journey when she figured it out. She reacted about as well as he would have expected. 

"You didn't think to tell me?" she said, irritation evident in her tone. 

"I didn't know how," he says, sounding much more pathetic than he intended, but it seems to cool her down in an instant. He still can't look at her. She will see how broken he is. She doesn't allow him the privacy to hide his shame, though. She slips out of the copilot chair and kneels in front of him. She holds his hands and looks up at him with gentleness. 

"Obi-Wan. I'm not going to let you spend the rest of your life on that dust-bucket." 

This is exactly where he thought this would go. She is going to try and convince him not to stay.

"I've already--"

"Not alone at least." 

For a moment he thinks he's heard her wrong. The words soak in but he's still stunned. 

"What do you--"

"This ship would sell for a fine price at Mos Eisley. We could easily purchase the materials to build, or find a foreclosed property and maybe even a speeder or rust bucket ship to fix up. You're good with ships, aren't you?" 

"Yes, but--"

"I always liked the fashion on Tatooine more than the Core Worlds. Much more comfortable even if you're always covered in sand." 

"You can stop interrupting me now, I think I get your point," he says, a small smile cracking on his face. His stomach flutters at the way she's looking at him. "But why? You don't have to." 

"I _want_ to. I stared at that door for days hoping you'd walk through it. Praying you'd be alive and the screaming Jedi I heard through the Force didn't include you. I'm not about to drop you off in the middle of the desert and turn my back on you. You were always there when I needed you, and now, I'm here for you." 

Stars he loves her so much. Once again, hope blooms in his chest, spreading through him and pushing away the pain he's been stewing in for most of the ride. She makes him feel himself again, even it's just fleeting moments. 

"I can't believe I threatened to have you arrested so many years ago." 

"I can't believe you never followed through with having me arrested." she fires back, and he can't help but chuckle softly.

You were far too beautiful to go to jail." 

"Oh _really_ now? You sure I didn't just have you beat?" 

"I'm sticking with the stunning beauty story." 

"Smart man," she says, standing and wandering back to check on the sleeping baby. He follows her movement, watching as she gazes down at the child with such curiosity and tender care. Her eyes flicker to his and she smiles when she realizes he's staring. "What?" 

That same smile is what he thought of after Mustafar. It's like deja vu he will get to keep reliving over and over again. 

"I just... I'm so lucky. The Force kept bringing you to me and I ignored it for so long instead of trusting the process. It took a literal bomb--"

"And me getting shrapnel to the side."

He will never hear the end of this one. 

"Right, maybe if I listened earlier I could have avoided that." 

She shakes her head, trying her best to maintain the deadpan expression. "I probably needed the wake-up call of a near-death experience if I'm being honest. Nothing like the cold embrace of blood loss to make you realize you're making the wrong life choices." 

"That's... one way of looking at it I suppose." 

The monitor beeps indicating they are reaching Tatooine. Obi-Wan turns back to the controls. "Coming out of hyperspace."

The bright lights of hyperspace fade away and the planet appears before them. It's twin sons shine behind it, casting a shadow over where they are entering. He glances over at her looking down at the planet with a strange look on her face. For a moment he fears she's changed her mind. If she has he won't fault her. Tatooine isn't exactly the nicest place to retire to. It must also bring back many painful memories for her. 

"My old enemy becomes my new home," she whispers, looking at him. His doubt fades away. He takes her hand in his and smiles at her lovingly. She's doing this for him. For them. And he will spend the rest of his life protecting her from the Hutts and making Tatooine the best home he can manage. 

They land in the late afternoon. As soon as the ramp drops Obi-Wan can feel the hot, dry air hitting him. He curses the thickness of his robes but knows he'll need it in case of a sand storm and in the cold of the night. He tells her he will take Luke to his uncle. She agrees. 

"I'll work on seeing what we can get for the ship. Buy us some food and supplies." Her gaze scans over him and she steps closer, cupping his cheek with her hand. "Are you sure you want to give him to his uncle?" She asks carefully. 

"Are you saying you want to raise an infant?"

She smiles nervously but doesn't answer his question. "You have this look on your face. Like you aren't ready to let him go."

How does he tell her that he _isn't_ ready? That holding this child-- Anakin's child-- in his arms knowing he will have to let him go is the most painful thing currently occupying his mind. Luke deserves a normal life, though. He deserves to be loved and to not grow up as a Jedi. Obi-Wan can teach younglings how to use a lightsaber or lift things with the Force. He can protect entire planets and walk through a battlefield without receiving a single scratch... But he has no idea how to raise a child normally. 

Not only does he have no idea, but Obi-Wan is entirely sure he physically wouldn't be able to. Not if he has to look into the eyes of his padawan or his senator friend every single day and be reminded that he watched them die. 

Partially by his hand. 

How can he be a surrogate father to a boy when he was the one who left his biological father alone to die? How can he show the love and compassion needed to raise a child when he's drowning beneath his outwardly calm demeanor?

Obi-Wan would love to be able to take Luke into his home and do things right. To raise him the way he wished he would have raised Anakin-- not grief-stricken and distant. But that isn't possible anymore. He failed with Anakin and he doesn't deserve the second chance with Luke.

"Owen Lars is his family. He deserves to be with his family." 

She gazes into his eyes with a sad look on her face. One that says _you are also his family._ Yes, he knows this. But if he loves Luke as much as he loved Anakin, he must let him go.

Obi-Wan takes young Luke out to the Skywalker moisture farm just as the suns begin to set. It is incredible to him how different the sunsets here are compared to on Coruscant. Instead of an endless view of skyscrapers and neon lights, there is just the limitless expanse of sand that seems to fade into the warm hues of the sky. While the sand usually is beige and dreary it now seems to hold an indigo shade that strikes Obi-Wan as actually being quite beautiful.

"Don't worry my dear, Luke," he says to the infant as he slips off the eopie he rode there. "I will make sure you are safe. I looked after both your father and mother in my day, and now I will do the same for you. One day, when you're ready, I'll tell you about all the adventures your father and I went on." 

Memories flash through his brain. Memories of Anakin jumping out and off of things on impulse. The two of them coming together in battle as one efficient unit, the blur of their blue sabers moving so quickly there seemed to be ten Jedi fighting instead of only two. The little sarcastic quips they shared in the midst of conflict because as much as the world was burning around them they still managed to find dark humor to keep them going. The mortified look on the young knight's face when Obi-Wan cut Anakin's hair into a mullet, and that smirk on Anakin's face when Obi-Wan saw him weeks later and realized that he was keeping the silly hairstyle just to spite him. All the pranks he and Ahsoka played on him over the years that he acted like were too childish and unprofessional, but he couldn't help but smile. All the times spent sitting on the floor of his quarters talking about random things over a cup of tea. Or the times he would wordlessly drag his sleeping mat to Obi-Wan's room after they were apart for a long time just so they could catch up until falling asleep midsentence. 

Tears form in Obi-Wan's eyes. He takes a deep breath, trying to push them back. 

"I'll teach you about the Jedi and the world before this... Empire." His voice cracks a little. Obi-Wan pulls a lightsaber out of his pocket and holds it in front of the baby's view. Luke reaches out with his tiny hand toward the weapon. "And I'll hold onto _this_ until you're old enough to know it's power. Your father would have wanted you to have it. I'm truly surprised he managed to hold onto it as long as he did." He puts it back in his pocket, leaning down and placing a soft kiss to the baby's head. "Anakin would have loved you, Luke. He would have been a wonderful father, too." 

Owen and Beru Lars walk out of the house, looking upon Obi-Wan's slow approach. He takes one last look down at Luke.

"May the force be with you, young one. Always."

He hands the infant to his aunt-- his new family. With a forced smile and a nod, he retreats back to the animal, hiding his forlorn face under the hood of his cloak. 

This is goodbye. For now at least. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that is the end. Thank you so much for reading! It's been a wild ride getting to write in two perspectives, but I've enjoyed the challenge. It's been lovely to get to see the same people coming back and commenting over and over again. It really motivates me to keep writing. 
> 
> How a one-shot turned into not one, but, two multi-chapter stories is still beyond me.
> 
> If you have a prompt idea or request my inbox is always open!
> 
> <3


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